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Do demisexuals experience arousal toward their partners?


Katerin

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I believe the term I'm looking for is associated arousal? I know that arousal is different for everyone, but has anyone ever experienced associated arousal but only when they formed an emotional bond with someone? 

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My understanding of demisexuality is that this sort of thing is a common experience among them. Demisexuals may not feel any arousal, or at least arousal that translates to sexual desire, for most of their lives outside of specific relationships (or towards specific people).

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As I understand it, that is what demisexual is :P You can only feel arousal towards someone once you have that emotional bond. The emotion bond doesn't guarantee arousal it simply can't exist without it.

 

So I think you a describing a common feeling :)

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TeamYellowUmbrella

I have! I go by demigraysexual, but I know what you mean. When I fell in love with my ex and made an emotional connection, I started having attractions that were sensual and sexual, but it still didn't change my want to not want sex. With normal crushes, it ends at sensual attraction. He is the only person who I have felt this way about, and after he broke up with me and showed his true colors, the attractions were completely gone.

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I tend to identify as demisexual and I'm not sure I could say that I've experienced this? Not to say that this can't be something another demi feels. For me I often experience arousal based primarily on physical responses (certain touch evokes arousal) that is more intense in the context of an emotional connection. 

If someone were to do something that my body finds arousing without that connection it either feels invasive, uncomfortable, or totally not arousing. 

Tl;dr I don't find people arousing on their own but I may want specific people I have attraction for to do specific arousing things? 

 

But maybe thats not demi? What is attraction even tbh?

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