Is it normal to be in denial of your gender identity?/Should I give up?

[Was here]

I keep thinking I'm just trying to be some character I imagine. Like it's okay to be a girl and hate my genitals. Like I'm forcing myself to be transgender. Like it's not worth questioning because I can never make myself male.

Spoiler

I feel like it's not worth it because questioning my gender might be a dumb or bad idea. I feel like I'm just imagining a better version of myself. When I imagine a better me as female now, it feels weird. I feel like it's wrong to want to abandon/give up my female body sometimes/most of the time(?).And then there's this thing that happened to me:

Spoiler

I was gonna put how my gender feels to me in a few points or something, but I feel exhausted thinking about it. 

 

I realize that this post didn't really go anywhere and that it's very vague, and I don't expect anyone to read my other posts before looking at this one which I worded terribly. *shrugs*.

[RK800]

Whether or not you're trans would be near impossible for me to determine.

However I'll give you a little of my own experiences:

I'm a transmale, and while I've known I wasn't a girl since I was very young I only recently came to terms with being trans (past couple years). Denial is a normal thing, before I came out I overcompensated like you wouldn't believe. I was so stereotypically "girly" but I was also miserable.

 

And something that always has left me in a state of not feeling "trans enough" is that the ability for me to transition is unlikely due to medical issues.

This was hard to accept, it's heartbreaking, it can make you feel trapped.

But what I'm getting at is that transitioning and gender aren't the same thing. You do not have to change your body to be a "real" man, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

[Guest]

I can relate, it's so hard trying to accept yourself if you're not sure about anything just yet...I've been thinking for a long time if my current gender identity was the right one to go with, I don't hate my genitials but i'm a-ok about them..I also have no issue with my body but can't imagine calling myself trans. To be honest: I've never really been that super girly but i don't really feel like a tomboy either, sometimes it's good to sit back and think if it's right to force yourself into something you are not sure is right for you, been doubting for too long if i wasn't just a trans guy but i'm a 100% convinced i'm not because i don't want to transition. I think you should just give it some time and just ask around, take all the time you need and don't jump into something too soon, especially if you aren't too sure yet

[Was here]

17 minutes ago, Jayce said:

I can relate, it's so hard trying to accept yourself if you're not sure about anything just yet...I've been thinking for a long time if my current gender identity was the right one to go with, I don't hate my genitials but i'm a-ok about them..I also have no issue with my body but can't imagine calling myself trans. To be honest: I've never really been that super girly but i don't really feel like a tomboy either, sometimes it's good to sit back and think if it's right to force yourself into something you are not sure is right for you, been doubting for too long if i wasn't just a trans guy but i'm a 100% convinced i'm not because i don't want to transition. I think you should just give it some time and just ask around, take all the time you need and don't jump into something too soon, especially if you aren't too sure yet

I keep thinking with my posts that i'm rushing into things too fast, heh. I keep going back and forth on,"I'm this" then,"no, i'm this" then,"I'm a girl, what the hell am I doing?" that last one is doubt though. usually.

[Busrider]

On ‎24‎.‎05‎.‎2017 at 0:47 AM, AnonAsker said:

I keep thinking I'm just trying to be some character I imagine

OK? - Is it a project on your backburner or does it feel right while you are trying? 

 

47 minutes ago, AnonAsker said:

"I'm this" then,"no, i'm this" then,"I'm a girl, what the hell am I doing?"

I know close to nothing about gender. - Recently I watched the following video and assume it's essence might apply to your issue(s?) too. 

Spoiler

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skgqeUqIwvA

• Don't pre-define who or what you are!
• Stop thinking about it.
• Live your life,
• Express yourself
• Question all externally defined role models; i.e. "I'm a girl, what the hell am I doing?" is probably the wrong thought, unless you were pondering to beat the crap out of some male boxing champ. 

Sorry, I think in this age there isn't much impossible for women. They surely have their internal picking order among themselves, that I'll never understand but the rest? almost all career choices seem open. - Your final conventional role inside a relationship depends mostly on what kind of partner you 'll find. And you are pretty free to "crossdress" as you like. - I'm tempted to argue that female crossdressing doesn't really exist. 

 

In a nutshell: You have a name; why on earth would you need a gender?

[Alice Woodstock]

23 hours ago, AnonAsker said:

I keep thinking with my posts that i'm rushing into things too fast, heh. I keep going back and forth on,"I'm this" then,"no, i'm this" then,"I'm a girl, what the hell am I doing?" that last one is doubt though. usually.

Time helps a lot, I'm 34 still questioning myself but don't have any hurry, since I started to question my gender this year. I had to throw away all the comcept of gender to became happy, any gender I try to impose to me feels like a prision (trying to act like a man was killing me inside, thats why I start questioning) and the first thing I learned when I stopped trying to be something is: it doesn't metter, or at laeast shoudn't metter. If somone born as a man go out with a dress and makeup people still make jugements, but at least no one have to act like a man or woman to live. PS: I was always considered crazy anyway because of my style and ideas, but this is what makes me unique.

[Zoningout]

It's not impossible to someday transition that's what you choose to do in your future it might not be able to change everything but it works differently for different people and It may end up working very well for you. We're never going to be the best looking even cisgendered people are not always happy with their appearance or looks and it's good to sometimes Recognize that whatever you can do to make yourself feel a little bit more comfortable is exactly what you should do if it makes you happy. Weather that's transition 

or just simply getting clothing you like wearing. 

 

What it sounds like is you're going through doubting because we are brought up in a certain way or if we're not brought up this way we often hear it from other people around us that we should be a certain way think a certain way act a certain way according to our gender given at birth and because of this problem as adults or young kids it creates a lot of

doubting and fears it's possible that's where it's coming from. Because questioning is okay, you know you should always question even simple things in life because you may find something interesting or even helpful for your future or happiness. Doubt's won't stay forever and over time they can be worked out and eventually they'll fade, but you're human so i can't say they'll completely leave but they may end up to be not as troublesome eventually. 

 

I used to feel the same about if I gave up my body I should feel ashamed but it's my body my life and even though that can be selfish selfish is not always something negative

it can be positive if done for the correct reasons. I know for me I was so concerned with how my family would perceive me changing my body that I was too nervous to do it or even consider making that a possibility period but I came to terms with the fact this is my body not their body and if this is my body than that means I'm not betraying anybody not hurting anybody . nobody is attached to this body I am attached to this body because these parts on me our mine nobody else's other people don't need to be concerned about what we do and don't do to our bodies and it doesn't mean that we are doing anything bad.

 

On our body we have parts they grew because of whatever hormones got into us while we were in the womb or developing or whatever . that's nature to do with how we developed doesn't have to do with anything else if the brain doesn't like it if we don't like it and so be it we don't like it and we don't need to have it on us if we don't want to. Family friends parents they'll learn the hard way eventually that our body parts don't make us who we are there just parts what makes us, us is our personality's and if you're not happy how can that personality shine? So i say, do whatever you please and if you're concerned that's normal if you're doubting that's normal but don't let things get to your head 

you know you more then anyone in the entire world because you are the one carrying around your own brain so last i new nobody can say they know you more then you.