Coming out tips????

[athenahono]

I have just recently discovered I am a heteromantic asexual and I'm terrified to tell my parents. My close friends I told took it well and were happy for me. My crush/best friend, whom I tell everything (who likes me too and everyone ships us but we aren't ready to date yet) was completely okay with it and was very encouraging! about it! I feel so much more comfortable in my own skin now. So that's all and well but I grew up in a Christian household, while I'm no longer a Christian, my family is. I'm 17 so I'm still living with them. I have divorced parents with different views on various things. I'm literally terrified to tell them about being asexual. I'm scared they will get mad because "I want grandkids" or "Are you ok?" or "What's wrong with you?" or whatever degrading-feeling statement. 

 

Specifically I'm gray-asexual. I do have fleeting sexual attractions and I'd be okay with doing it with a loved one but I don't desire it or see the appeal other than a form of affection to my partner. I'm terrified to tell my parents and I don't know how to explain all that without it getting awkward. I honestly don't know if they even know what it is!!! I'm terrified of rejection. 

Anybody have any tips? If so, it's much appreciated.

Update: 

 

My mom and I discussed asexuality and her reaction to it...does not make me feel confident telling her I'm gray-asexual. She wasn't against if but one thing was "I'd look at their life situation before deciding if they need help, because it could be a sign of mental issues." And another thing said was "They just haven't met the right person yet."

Please help. 

[ReyGraves]

First and foremost your safety is priority. It doesn't sound like any physical things will happen but if you don't feel safe then I wouldn't recommend it. I understand wanting to tell someone, especially parents. But on the bright side you're 17, so you can be independent and not live with any toxicity. 

 

I can't judge your mother's character. Some people will say things like that but once they see someone close to them is completely fine and normal then they come around. Those words are sometimes born of ignorance. Does she truly understand what asexuality is? Instead of trying to explain it yourself maybe try to give them some resources to read. Or write a letter (which if they aren't willing to learn (which would mean they'd avoid any resources you send) then they'd probably be more willing to read a letter from their daughter.)

 

I'm not sure if any of this helps really. But I hear you, and I'm in a similar boat with my own mom over my gender. I thik she's avoiding the topic.

 

Anyway, I wish you luck!  

[athenahono]

Thank you for the advice! I will keep it in mind!!!

[carbomb]

Number one piece of advice that I can give is just don't do it if it'll put you in any sort of harm (physical / emotional / etc).

[nerdperson777]

Just one thought.  You don't have to come out about it.  Someone at my school that I met once at an ace meeting said that she told her mom that she's a lesbian, even if it's specifically homoromantic asexual.  The idea is that the only person that has to know whether you do or do not have a sex life would be your partner(s).