Misinterpreting emotional attraction as sexual arousal? Is that a thing?

[Something in Nothing]

Hi there. Im new to this...well...whole thing. Not sure if I am asexual or not. I check off on all the lists. It sounds right. Im just confused about attraction vs. arousal. 

 

Let me explain. I always thought my sexuality was fluid because the "signs" that you are aroused by a certain person occurred with all genders. I would be able to tell their facial structure was symmetrical so they were pretty/handsome. I would have butterflies when we became lost in deep conversation so therefore i must be having a crush. Meeting someone new, any person, would leave me feeling elated with my heart racing because I was just glad someone gave me their time and consideration (its a long story of low self esteem). Anyways, I thought i was a little "turned on" by everyone. On the other hand, nudity did nothing for me because their body was more interesting covered by their style choice in clothing. As far as all the bases of having sex go, they were sloppy and superficial to me. I only got stress release from it but i could just go for a run or eat some ice cream or listen to a favorite song for the same effect. It was like making the bed. I dont see the point but its what is expected so you mumble as you tuck it in. 

 

My point and rather question is what i was feeling about people of every gender that were logical estimations or inspired by an emotional connection...were they really just platonic appreciation that i mistook as sexual in nature? 

 

Thanks for reading. This is all so confusing but i want to right about it before i accept any orientation. What do you think about all this? Any comments or insights would be greatly appreciated. Thanks again.

[FeralGenie]

I would say that's definitely a thing! I feel very related to what you're describing, actually, but I didn't realise what was going on until this year. I think it's very hard to get clear about what you're really feeling when society is telling you what you should be feeling all the time. But for me it sounds that you have it pretty clear : ) 

[ItWasNiceKnowingYou]

You're definitely not alone in this. Before i even knew asexuality & platonic attraction were "things", i was always confused by when i realllllllyyyy wanted to be close to a squish. I would imagine us in situations i wouldn't be in with anyone else who wasn't close to me (like cuddling & sharing each other's space). I confused me being emotionally close with these individuals with other attractions that didn't fit....but i had no other words to explain them at that time.

 

You seem like you've already come to a conclusion, but of course it's up to you