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I am not sure if I am asexual....


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Hello, my friend.

I would be really thankful if you may help me with my question.

I am 20 years old, female. I had a boyfriend when I was 18. I found one really weird thing, he was definitely suggesting to have a sex together, but my mind was so blind, I couldn't see it. When he was talking about sex, I was assuming that this is just simple chat, without anything underneath. He was suggesting so many times....poor guy. But my mind didn't really think of sex with him, even I really liked him. After a significant effort he just asked for a kiss. 

I did enjoy it, but I really often was paying attention to the sound of sucking, which annoyed me. I also couldn't understand how he knows what to do, and how to take a pleasure from it. So I literally started repeating it, from what he did. We didn't go any further than petting.

Obviously, eventually we broke up.

I masturbate and I enjoy it. I have sex fantasies. I can like/love someone. But I never understood the passion male or female has to have a sex. I never looked at anyone with a desire of sex. 

I am assuming, that this is because I am virgin, and I just don't know how it feels, or this is a thing person needs to practice. But after some research, I am thinking, maybe it is not a reason. 

Thank you for reading it :) 

 

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By sex fantasies, are these of yourself with other people?

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13 minutes ago, Star Bit said:

 

By sex fantasies, are these of yourself with other people?

Yes, usually myself with other. But other people are mostly fictional characters, or even creatures. (From Games , comic books and etc.)

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Hi!

You don't need to have had sex to know you don't desire it. It's like saying, you have to hug a cactus, because how else would you know, if you enjoy that.

I feel like the term asexual fits you, though in the end that is for you to decide of course.

Also, welcome to AVEN! :)

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28 minutes ago, TinyZapp said:

Hi!

You don't need to have had sex to know you don't desire it. It's like saying, you have to hug a cactus, because how else would you know, if you enjoy that.

I feel like the term asexual fits you, though in the end that is for you to decide of course.

Also, welcome to AVEN! :)

Thanks ! :3 

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On 3/24/2017 at 1:27 AM, Iruya said:

Yes, usually myself with other. But other people are mostly fictional characters, or even creatures. (From Games , comic books and etc.)

So then you only desire sex with fictional characters? That's not asexual, but it it under Gray-A where you'd effectively be asexual due to the aforementioned.

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