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How do I know?


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Hello and welcome, geewhiz! :cake:

 

That is a very fair question and not the easiest one to answer.

 

Honestly I'm still questioning some things; I'm not 100% that I lean towards romantic, but I'm reluctant to let it go completely.

 

Anyways, my advice is: don't wait!

 

Explore, find things, ask questions, talk to people, see what works best for you. If your question had more to do with time (;p)... ehh that's not possible to answer. Sorry. 

 

Good luck and have fun!

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Aside from asexuality just being no desire for sex, a few things can still effect this.

 

 

1)      Age; most people realize their sexuality as late as 17, but a minority are at 20. So if you're under that age it could still be developing.

2)      Masturbation; things may not be 'linked up' if you haven't, or being unable to may reflect health problems (low hormones, tumor).

3)      Making out/foreplay (perhaps specifically with a crush or someone trusted); if you desire to but never have then you may end up having responsive sexual desire (where arousal or foreplay is required to trigger sexual desire every time) like a majority of women and a minority of men do, i.e. half the population.

4)    Medication; some can lower or kill libido, as well as impair arousal/orgasm intensity.

 

 

 

What makes you unsure of your orientation?

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How long should you wait?

Until you feel comfortable with whatever orientation you choose to identify as. There's no rush, take your time. You don't ever have to decide if you don't want to; some people prefer to live their lives without labels. There is no set path for discovering your orientation. We all make our own way, so don't worry if what you're doing/thinking/feeling isn't the same as everyone else. You just do what's right for you, and don't worry about the rest of us.

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I wouldn't put it down to a length of time to wait. Things can change tomorrow, or a week from now, or 10 years from now or never. I'd be more open to things being able to change, rather than when.

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On 17/01/2017 at 2:41 AM, Fox6 said:

How you identify yourself is a personal decision, and no one can tell you how long you should wait.

This is absolutely correct but absolutely crucially you mustn't ever false represent. Many people have been duped into a commitment of marriage, had children and lost 2, 3 or even 4 decades of their lives on people who hid their true asexual or gay identity. There's nothing wrong with being gay, nor is there anything wrong with being asexual but there sure as hell is something wrong with lying or 'failing to disclose' something that will most likely have a huge impact on the longevity of a relationship.

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3 hours ago, James121 said:

This is absolutely correct but absolutely crucially you mustn't ever false represent. Many people have been duped into a commitment of marriage, had children and lost 2, 3 or even 4 decades of their lives on people who hid their true asexual or gay identity. There's nothing wrong with being gay, nor is there anything wrong with being asexual but there sure as hell is something wrong with lying or 'failing to disclose' something that will most likely have a huge impact on the longevity of a relationship.

I think that the case with asexuality is different from homosexuality. An asexual doesn't need someone else to satisfy their needs. Besides it's not like their partner won't notice a lack of interest in sex, and if it's a deal breaker they wouldn't be marrying anyway. Unless you lie about not having sex before marriage.

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