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pissed off, fed up...opinions?


butterflydreams

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butterflydreams

I've not been in the best state lately (mentally or physically), and I've refrained from posting here in the past week. I still feel I need to keep a low profile for a while, but this one thing has come up and is upsetting me, and it's relevant here.

 

I, like many people my age, have student loans. Obviously, the account is under my birth name. Every year they send me a 1098 form that lists the interest paid for the year, because it's tax deductible. It's the only deduction I get, so pretty important.

 

The loans were federal, but they are serviced by a third party company. This company has a website. I log in and manage the account, get my tax forms, set up auto-payment, etc. When my name changed, I logged in to update my name, so it will be correct on my tax form. They let you update your last name easily through the web form on your account. You cannot update your first name this way (my first name is the only thing that changed). I read their FAQ. Says I need to supply a court order faxed to them to change my first name.

 

Clearly they allow simple changing of last name because people get married a lot. No documentation or proof required. That's fine, but if you're going to do that, first name should be the same thing. I've always hated that government, society, everybody seems to cater to marriage in every way possible. Gay marriage was always a red herring. If one group of people is entitled to the laundry list of legal benefits afforded by marriage, everyone (gay, straight, or Gelgamek) should be able to get them if they so choose, even if they're single (where applicable), just BFFs living together, or whatever. I cannot stand this pedestalization of marriage bullshit.

 

I wrote emails to the loan servicer company asking them why I was being asked to meet a higher burden of proof. They waffled the first time. I pushed harder. They finally told me that the rules on this weren't their own, but those of the federal government that they have to follow. So I filed a complaint with the feds on their site. They got back to me fairly quickly with a non-answer and a link to their FAQ which says NOTHING about name changes.

 

Now I'm pissed. I know this might seem like a minor quibble, and having my old name on this form hopefully won't affect my taxes at all, but it's principle now. Once again, preferential treatment is being given to marriage and I'm sick of it. I am NOT going to fax these assholes a copy of my court order. It's none of their damn business. Unless they force married people to submit equivalent documentation to change last names. This is an asinine policy, and being jerked around by the feds and the loan servicer on my question of "why?" has only made me more upset. Obviously I could easily fax them the court order, but it's not about that anymore.

 

I wrote to GLAD.org's answers line to see what they say (haven't heard back yet). I've talked to friends about it and they agree that it's bullshit, though are more mixed on my reaction to fighting it (90% support). One friend is effectively in a domestic partnership with his girlfriend and is very much behind me, because he runs into this shit all the time because they're not married.

 

Am I overreacting? Should I fight this? What other avenues do I have?

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Anthracite_Impreza

I can't give you any advice but you most certainly should fight this. Marriage is given a ridiculous amount of privilege and it's about time it stopped.

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Dodecahedron314

You're not overreacting, this is total BS. Unfortunately, I don't have much experience or knowledge in this area, so I can't really offer any concrete solutions, but if nothing else, know that you're completely justified in feeling this way. 

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It doesn't seem to me that you're overreacting. Their stance appears to be an unreasonable one that is not even backed up by the government, and they went so far as to lie about that -- which probably means that they know they're doing something unreasonable and were hoping that you would back off after hearing about the governmental angle (good on you for following it up!).

 

I agree that the legal benefits accorded to marriage are rather extreme and find it silly that most if not all aren't extended to other situations as well, for that matter. Were it me, I'd be inclined to fight this on principle for that reason if nothing else, and making you and others in your situation jump through so many extra hoops is completely unreasonable regardless.

 

Unfortunately I haven't got any advice for how to do this. I'm not real up on legal matters. Hopefully GLAD will have something, or there may be some other group you can go to (although I don't know what they would be).

 

 

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Argh, I so feel you about the annoying preference of marriage. It's ridiculous. My (now probably ex) best friend hates to make phone calls, so I made a crap ton of those on her behalf. My first few attempts failed since I foolishly introduced myself with my own last name. As soon as I changed that, everything was fine. Just introducing myself with her last name opened everything, I got access to all sorts of stuff without being questioned even once. Boy did that suck, and as if this was any significant improvement in the safety department...

 

I think that the offices hold the whip hand in that one, so I'd suggest to fax that goshdarn crap piece of paper before they deny you your money, as much as it may suck. There's no reason not to fight that crap, though. I totally see why it would be annoying, but :(  *trunk hug*

 

The only reason I can imagine for this name changing policy to exist is some kind of fraud prevention. Can't really think of anything else, even though it doesn't make much sense.

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There might, MIGHT, be a reason for the first name nonsensery. In some places (such as where I live), certain punishments and responsibilities can be completely evaded by changing your name. For example...the no fly list. If you've done something terrible enough to get put on the no fly list, it does NOT legally stop you  from changing your name. And this name change is NOT updated in the no fly list database. Therefore you bypass the rules with a name change. I don't think its LIKELY that any one could actually pull off tax fraud simply by changing their name, but that could be why the issues with first name changes. This is still a case of preferential treatment to marriages...since last names change all the time they just wave the due process for convenience sake. But there could be SOME kind of reason for the difficulties in changing a first name, not just nonsense for the sake of nonsense.

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butterflydreams

I did consider that. If the answer is to prevent fraud, they could've easily said that, but they haven't. Besides, wouldn't it be easier to say you're a different person by changing your last name?

 

And to clarify, the servicer is claiming this is a government policy. That's why I feel like I definitely have a leg to stand on.

 

AAA (American automobile association) does something similar where you can update your last name, but not your first. But they're a private organization. Harder to dispute. And I think all they want you to do in that case is call, they probably don't care about proof.

 

And this is obviously different from changing my name at the bank. They require proof for all name changes, whether it be a court order, or a marriage certificate, or whatever. I have no problem with that policy.

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1 minute ago, Hadley167 said:

AAA (American automobile association) does something similar where you can update your last name, but not your first. But they're a private organization. Harder to dispute. And I think all they want you to do in that case is call, they probably don't care about proof.

 

Huh, the first method I tried for changing my AAA information was calling, so I didn't realize that there were other options that only work for the last name. The person on the phone automatically assumed that I was changing my last name rather than my first, so they almost sent me a card with "[Birth Name] [Chosen Name]" printed on it, but I didn't need to provide any documentation at all.

 

In regards to the student loan group, seeing a double standard work against you is definitely a valid reason to get angry. I imagine that this is more a matter of principle than anything else. To be completely honest, if I were in the same situation, I'd probably be more of the type to just gripe and send the documentation their way, but I'm also not so pompous as to suggest that my reaction is right, yet alone the only right option.

 

Regardless, I hope this doesn't scenario doesn't become more of a headache than it already is.

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butterflydreams
7 minutes ago, Mezzo Forte said:

To be completely honest, if I were in the same situation, I'd probably be more of the type to just gripe and send the documentation their way, but I'm also not so pompous as to suggest that my reaction is right, yet alone the only right option.

If they'd given me a reasonable explanation for the discrepancy, or any explanation, I'd have sent them what they wanted, begrudgingly. But the runaround has aggravated the situation for me.

 

At least people are validating my frustration on this. I couldn't decide whether or not I was overreacting. 

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45 minutes ago, Hadley167 said:

At least people are validating my frustration on this. I couldn't decide whether or not I was overreacting. 

I don't see why anyone wouldn't validate your frustration.

 

My assumption is that there are two different levels of surroundings to deal with during transition. The "big stuff" like making decisions about whether or not to go for the physical part, how far to go, all that. And then the "small", everyday kind of thing like dealing with office bs. It's all just minor stuff, but it's not really rewarding and as soon you're finished on one end, another obstacle appears. "Bonus", they're all constant reminders of the Hadley from the past...

 

*hugs* :) 

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Hi Hadley,

 

I would think if it is easy to change the last name on the website, it better be very very difficult to change the first and middle names, don't you think? 

 

I'd be interested to know if they have some other way of verifying last name changes?  People change their last names for reason other than marriage.

 

Did you update the SSA with your name change?  I know they just don't take your word for it.  Would you feel more comfortable contacting the US Department of Education and updating your info there and let them forward it to the loan servicer??

 

Your most important question has to do with whether the IRS accepts the 1098E with the right ssn but the wrong name ... or at least a different name than what you are using on your tax return.  You could give the IRS a call, or a tax specialist who might be volunteering some hours at the public library, etc.  Otherwise, you would know in due time if your filing was kicked out as having a mismatch on one of the forms. 

 

All the best,

Lucinda

 

 

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