Maiflower Posted January 7, 2017 Share Posted January 7, 2017 It depends on the person. For some, I would try to avoid answering. If they'll get confused about what it means, I'll just simplify it all the way to bisexual, or pan if they know what that is. If I know they know about asexuality, then I'd explain the whole thing. Link to post Share on other sites
cato Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 My sexual orientation doesn't come up too often in polite company I don't typically talk about my (lack of) orientation; it feels like TMI and unnecessary information. It's not that I'm ashamed of it or disapprove of non-hetero people doing it; I just don't see a point in announcing non-news, I guess. The only time it would feel appropriate is if someone was hounding me about being in a relationship, but that's never happened anyway, family or otherwise. On the very, very rare occasion I have mentioned it, I've only mentioned the sexual orientation part. For one, most people don't differentiate romantic and sexual orientation anyway, and two, I sound like a sociopath if I really drive home the point that I really just don't care about having romantic relationships. Link to post Share on other sites
WhenSummersGone Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 I would probably say both since they are different from each other. Link to post Share on other sites
EnterCreativeName Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 I usually just say my sexual orientation, it's easier to explain and for others to understand. If they further ask, or the conversation continues, I might bring up my romantic orientation too. Link to post Share on other sites
MarieIsEatingTacobell Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 To be honest, if it's just anyone I'll tell them I'm "LGTB+" without specifying. To family say that I'm Pan. I don't hide being Demi but- I don't explicitly point it out because they were weird enough about the Pan thing to begin with. My best friend and my online friends all know I'm Pansexual and Demisexual. I have a certain group of friends that also know I'm Fictosexual. Yeah, I know I'm all over the place, haha. Link to post Share on other sites
XYZ96 Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 I say I'm either hetero or nothing (together, as in I say I might be hetero, but I might also be nothing), I haven't been asked that often, only once or twice or so.... Spoiler I remember someone in my class actually asked that me in 10th grade, because she thought I was lesbian.... other then that, a similar question I've been asked/told three or four times was if I'm asexual, to which I usually just shrugged... Link to post Share on other sites
anzu2snow Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 I don't think people have actually asked me yet. Definitely not since I've realized I'm aro ace, that wasn't that long ago. Most people have assumed I'm straight. Official forms that I've filled out in the past didn't have ace as an option, and certainly not a romantic option. Since I've realized I'm aro ace, I've been very open about it. So, if someone were to ask, I'd probably tell them aro ace. If it was a total stranger off the street, I probably wouldn't say anything and just go back to whatever I was doing. Link to post Share on other sites
Nidwin Posted January 13, 2017 Share Posted January 13, 2017 On 06/01/2017 at 9:47 AM, Skycaptain said: I'll say both, as an aro-ace it's nice and easy Same here but I've never been asked, or yet. Link to post Share on other sites
cheericrochet Posted January 13, 2017 Share Posted January 13, 2017 I really depends who I'm talking to. I'm not really out as ace so I usually just tell people my romantic orientation. Or I just try to avoid answering altogether. Link to post Share on other sites
TheCatBehind Posted January 14, 2017 Share Posted January 14, 2017 I have been asked a couple of times if I was gay/bi. Every time I said "no."... And that's usually the end of that. I'm not lying! I'm not saying what I am tho. Link to post Share on other sites
Sisky Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 On 6.1.2017 at 10:36 PM, borkfork said: People don't ask. They speculate and make assumptions. ^ Otherwise I'd just say I'm not interested. Link to post Share on other sites
sindi Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 I only announce being asexual, if even that (I might also just explain, that I'm not interested in sexual things), because being biromantic could be "controversial" to some xP Link to post Share on other sites
Nebulous Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 If someone were to ask, I would mention both my romantic and sexual orientations. I don't see the subject as embarrassing or taboo. I'd only get uncomfortable if the other person is bothered by discussion of intimacy or sex, though in that case, they probably wouldn't be asking about my orientation in the first place. Link to post Share on other sites
luzblue Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 People usually haven't heard of asexuality or they confuse it with celibacy--so if I don't know them that well, I'll just say I'm not looking for a relationship and I'm fine being single. They always assume I'm sexual though. Last time a friend asked me I didn't know what I was... if they asked again now I would explain it to them, but probably saving the word "asexual" for the end of the conversation (and completely leave the grey-a and lithromantic stuff out at first... It's just too much for most people to take in in one sitting) Link to post Share on other sites
drjohnhwatson Posted January 22, 2017 Share Posted January 22, 2017 I get this a lot at work. Like, they don't generally ask stuff directly, but they talk about sex a lot. Which is always jarring as they're teenagers and I don't feel it's an appropriate place to talk about it nor do I feel like I should be talking to kids about that sort of thing. At one point I was doing something and one of them came up and nice as you please asked me if I like the taste of sperm when I give a blowjob (because they don't! It's so gross!) and I was astonished. I just made a quick joke, they laughed, and I side-stepped out of that one. I've told one person (a co-worker, incidentally) because they casually mentioned they were trying to woo an asexual boy (it did not work out for them, haha) and they didn't feel like they understood it. Then they asked me a bunch of questions. Otherwise, I just let people assume I'm straight. Some of the people I work with think that I'm a virgin, and some of them think that I have a "Normal, Average, Straight Sex Life" and I just let them because I don't need to be the topic of endless gossip. If a stranger just randomly asks me what I am, I'll probably just lie and say I'm straight. It's so much easier lying. It's sad, but it's true. So, so much easier. (As for the poll, I said I just tell them romantic orientation if they ask. "I like guys!!!" is my standby. Not a lie, but not the full truth either, haha). Link to post Share on other sites
C8H7N3O2 Posted January 24, 2017 Share Posted January 24, 2017 Depending on who's asking, I'll either be honest, lie (flat out or by omission), or simply not answer. Link to post Share on other sites
CentaurianPrincess Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 I just say I'm not interested in anyone and don't use the word asexual. Link to post Share on other sites
helana12_03 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 I usually tell people I'm heterosexual. Link to post Share on other sites
Tatsuya Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 It doesn't come up very often, but if people ask I always say "asexual". I guess I assume that anyone who knows what asexual means will automatically assume aromantic too. Link to post Share on other sites
will123 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 Ive never been asked this. I would probably say none of their business. Which to some people would mean I'm gay. Link to post Share on other sites
will123 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 On 24/01/2017 at 5:41 AM, C8H7N3O2 said: Depending on who's asking, I'll either be honest, lie (flat out or by omission), or simply not answer. That pretty close to what I might say If I was ever asked. Link to post Share on other sites
will123 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 On 22/01/2017 at 1:53 AM, drjohnhwatson said: Otherwise, I just let people assume I'm straight. Some of the people I work with think that I'm a virgin, and some of them think that I have a "Normal, Average, Straight Sex Life" and I just let them because I don't need to be the topic of endless gossip. Exactly! Link to post Share on other sites
DayDreamer~ Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 I've not been asked by a stranger before, though the closest I've gotten was when someone asked what the flag was that I put on my 'mental framework' picture we all drew for class. I put an Asexual flag and a German flag crossed over an American flag under my name (since I have blood relatives in Germany, though I'm American). I simply said it was an 'orientation flag,' and they just said okay, satisfied with the answer. If someone specifically asked me though if the topic comes up, I won't hesitate to tell them I'm Ace. Most of my friends know already. Link to post Share on other sites
X86 Posted January 30, 2017 Share Posted January 30, 2017 "Probably asexual", because, you know, they asked for a sexual orientation. This usually results in more questions, so I'll probably end up stating my romantic orientation as well. Link to post Share on other sites
SithAzathoth WinterDragon Posted March 26, 2017 Share Posted March 26, 2017 After being told once that "You'll change you mind, your not ready yet! Do not worry it's ok" I explained my orientation and that I am not hetero and have no desire to even try being sexual. I have only told 3 people, my best friend (former bagpipe trainer) she supports me for who I am, my mom (not blood or adoptive or godmother) I should not have said it to her since she has no interest and no respect, and my cousin who is related to me. I have not told anyone else and I will not since I do not know what others will say, if they ask I'll say what I feel is needed but otherwise I'll remain quiet. Link to post Share on other sites
Dreamer23 Posted March 26, 2017 Share Posted March 26, 2017 Depending on how they phrase the question, I'd probably just try avoiding to answer (as in a friendly / winking "You hitting on me? Sorry, not my type!") Link to post Share on other sites
chair jockey Posted March 26, 2017 Share Posted March 26, 2017 In real life, people just assume that I'm sexless (as in no sexuality) because I'm middle-aged, soft-bodied and partly bald. But if there were ever some strange person who asked about my sexual orientation, I'd be honest and say "I don't have one." Not asexual, because that's an orientation too; I just simply take life as it comes without deciding anything in advance. Link to post Share on other sites
Polygon Posted March 26, 2017 Share Posted March 26, 2017 On 1/6/2017 at 4:36 PM, borkfork said: People don't ask. They speculate and make assumptions. Too true. Link to post Share on other sites
Mezzo Forte Posted March 27, 2017 Share Posted March 27, 2017 I usually describe my orientation rather than outright state it, so I'm essentially describing being aro ace. When discussing orientation though, I'm more likely to state my asexuality than my aromanticism. Link to post Share on other sites
carbomb Posted March 27, 2017 Share Posted March 27, 2017 I'll either say straight, ace, "Straight but without sex" or "Asexual but I like girls", depending on the person. Link to post Share on other sites
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