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Have you ever falling in love with someone but you know deep down you two will never be a couple?


CakeMonster64

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CakeMonster64
Last year I met my long distance best friend/love interest on an free therapy site. I never thought I would ever meet someone that means the world to me on a site that was strictly  anonymous. We weren't suppose to give each other our personal information.   
I guess our first encounter made us feel like we want to be more than strangers. 
We've stayed in touch for a whole year via text, we've also skype a few times but mainly we text each other daily. Like we were good old friends. She knows of my feelings for her. She doesn't share the same feelings but she was willing to get to know me in person to see who we are offline. She told me "We could have a potential relationship in the future".
I'm 29 going on 30. I never had a relationship personal choice. Last year I had to end many close friendships with people I knew since we were teens. Those ex friends took advantage of my friendship. They emotionally, mentally and narcissistic abused me. I was too naïve to notice that those friends only wanted me for their personal needs. I was too kind hearted to let these people go cause I feared of abandonment. 
My long distance friend was only one that truly cared for me. I didn't feel like I was a burden, I didn't feel like she was using me, I didn't feel that she would abandon me. Yet I feared she would someday. 
My insecurities and trust issues took a toll on me last year that I didn't want to get too close with her. She was the one that made the effort to stay in touch. To truly be there for me when I felt like no one even cared how I am.  She capture my heart but I had to let her go for the sake of our friendship. I told her that we should remain friends (and we always were) because I dont know when we'll ever meet up. I want her to find herself and learn to be independent. She's going to be 20 this year. The only relationship she ever had was with her abusive ex a few years back. She is a smart woman to take care of herself first and choose to being single until she is ready to commit.
 
 As for me I know I'll always be in love with her. We have a emotional connection that we both don't want to lose. I love her too much that I fear of losing her.  It is hard for me to picture myself with anyone cause I am so use to being single. If she ever felt she wanted to be more than friends. I still want us to be platonic,  go slow and take our time. To be honest, the distance will destroy us. I rather be present than distance.   Because I don't want my first relationship to be long distance. Its already difficult for me to be so far away from her. I hope one day I'll meet her face to face. We still stay in touch I hope it'll continue. This year I need to find myself, stop dwelling about the past and learn self love.
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Well, I think it happen to everyone.

Once I thought me and a person I was friends with would make a nice couple, but then I realized, nah, I don't want to ruin this friendship, I wanna love somebody else.

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CakeMonster64
2 hours ago, AVEN #1 fan said:

Well, I think it happen to everyone.

Once I thought me and a person I was friends with would make a nice couple, but then I realized, nah, I don't want to ruin this friendship, I wanna love somebody else.

Well, the problem is I know I'll always love her and it maybe impossiable for anyone to replace that. Who knows...

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12 minutes ago, CakeMonster64 said:

Well, the problem is I know I'll always love her and it maybe impossiable for anyone to replace that. Who knows...

Babe,  your love drunk.

It took me like 7 months to fully get over the attraction I had for an ex BFF of mine, I think that's bc we rarely talk by now as friends. Right now, I even question if what I felt was romantic love.  I was such a fool, like she had a bf, was straight and lived far away, we would never be together.

Now I see her in a different way. I guess I'm better alone or with somebody else.

 

Women are hard and painful to forget.

 

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Given current circumstances (he is currently in a relationship), yes. 

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CakeMonster64
10 hours ago, AVEN #1 fan said:

Babe,  your love drunk.

It took me like 7 months to fully get over the attraction I had for an ex BFF of mine, I think that's bc we rarely talk by now as friends. Right now, I even question if what I felt was romantic love.  I was such a fool, like she had a bf, was straight and lived far away, we would never be together.

Now I see her in a different way. I guess I'm better alone or with somebody else.

 

Women are hard and painful to forget.

 

It isnt easy when she always stays in touch. 

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5 hours ago, CakeMonster64 said:

It isnt easy when she always stays in touch. 

Maybe you should lose touch.

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CakeMonster64
3 hours ago, CBC said:

Yeah I do agree, if it's too painful to continue communicating, perhaps you'd be best cutting ties. Which also isn't easy, but it may increase your chances of moving on.

I don't need to cut ties with her. I'm fine being in love with her and living my life apart. I have my reasons. She'll always be my best friend. I hope to meet her someday. 

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Don't know about the "falling in love with" part, but this definitely happened to me with people I was falling in like with. 

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WhenSummersGone

Yes, mostly from not having the feelings returned which really sucks. :(

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Yes. I love someone who lives in another country and she loves me. When we visit each other, our relationship is amazing. In the long term, though, the chances of either of us moving closer to the other person are extremely slim. Our friendship is deep and will be long-lasting; I just wish we could be recognized as a couple, too.

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Yes, I fell in love with a guy my age who I just knew I wouldn't end up with. But still I liked him, now it's been like a year since I've seen him and I think I'm over him. 

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