What partner enacted fetishes can an asexual have before it starts getting Gray?

[Star Bit]

(include purpose of fetish; sexual arousal, emotional satisfaction)

[Guest]

consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreating

[borkfork]

I don't see why emotional satisfaction should be an issue. Kink practices are mental as well as physical. If someone finds an activity therapeutic for instance, how is that a qualifier? The satisfaction (and rarely high) I get from taking someone into subspace only varies in intensity between a platonic play partner and my actual partner. I would be surprised to go to a dungeon on a Saturday night in LA and find maybe eight people who are in it purely for physical gratification. Take away emotion and there's no kink community.

[The Mechanic]

I agree with @borkfork, there's a lot of fetishes someone can be involved in without any sexual gratification or even arousal.  Even for a lot of sexual people the fetishes can be exciting just for the emotional gratification.

[GistOfSpirit]

4 minutes ago, CBC said:

Erm, if you're wanting to share sexual acts of any sort with a partner, wanting them to participate (whether there's a fetish or not involved), IMO that means you're not asexual. 

How is a sexual act defined though? Is it any act that physically arouses you? Only those that involved touching another person's genitals?

[GistOfSpirit]

13 minutes ago, CBC said:

I would say that it's any act that you're engaging in with someone else for the purposes of sexual pleasure. Whether you're touching that person or not wouldn't be the deciding factor in whether it's a sexual act. If Joe says he's really turned on when his boyfriend masturbates in front of him, but he doesn't touch him, I'd have a hard time believing that wasn't truly partnered sexual activity.

That makes sense to me

 

To test the limits of that though: If Joe said he's turned on when his bf combs his own hair (all kinds of fetishes might exist) would that also be partnered sexual activity?

Would it make a difference whether Bob (Joe's bf) finds the act arousing as well, or he's only doing it for Joe's sake?

[Star Bit]

On 12/8/2016 at 6:46 PM, skit` said:

consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreating

Either way your comment doesn't apply to what i was asking. If an asexual is just having sex to procreate that's not a fetish nor makes them Gray. Though some sexual people do have a pregnancy fetish (in terms of the person already being so or having the intent to get them so), but as i said they're completely sexual.

On 12/9/2016 at 3:41 AM, MrZ said:

That makes sense to me

 

To test the limits of that though: If Joe said he's turned on when his bf combs his own hair (all kinds of fetishes might exist) would that also be partnered sexual activity?

Would it make a difference whether Bob (Joe's bf) finds the act arousing as well, or he's only doing it for Joe's sake?

Yah, there's a really gray area on what is and isn't sex. But my point was more so on sexual fetishes done for non-sexual reasons (so emotional gratification); like licking breasts. It's not being done for anyones sexual benefit but its too common of an arousal spot to not call it sexual even if its desired for non-sexual reasons.