LittleGoody2Shoes Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 I have good friends who are willing to help me move, and supportive of who I am. Link to post Share on other sites
cavalier080854 Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 I have lots of friends, all know me as Ace. 2 gays, 5 straight men, 14 straight women and 3 trans women. Plus 5 other aro/aces, 4 women 1 man. I seem to pick up waifs and strays everywhere. I'll talk to anyone. BTW everyone thinks that the trans are women, also if we go out we are father and daughters as cover, that way no one hits on them. This a secret that I have accepted as their prerogative as to when they reveal themselves, or not. Link to post Share on other sites
turnipqueen Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 I'm an introvert too so it's hard to make friends. I have a few friends but they are all married and I don't trust anyone with my secrets. It's very lonesome though. Link to post Share on other sites
IceKitsune Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 I'm also an introvert so I only have a few close friends or people that I've been close with at certain points in time. I've drifted away from most of them though and only reach out to connect occasionally through the internet since we are so far apart. I like staying in touch occasionally but wish I had someone that I was closer to right now that I could see on a regular basis. I've moved recently so I don't really have any friends where I am right now. Need to work on that I guess. I haven't told any of my friends that I'm asexual. Link to post Share on other sites
anodyneinsect Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 If people consider me friends here that is neat. I did not come with a functioning friendship module so even though I have tried to figure this friendship thing out, things just fall apart. I am very giving and so have been mostly taken advantage of. I am also old, and not attractive according to society standards, have no desire for larva and am not into the things most people my age are so that may be contributing to it. It doesn't really bother me, I am introverted and spend most of my time in my studies and have great professors and family. I am not completely alone. ^_^ Link to post Share on other sites
Gloomy Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 I haven't really had friends since 2013 when I was still in college, and even before then I was a loner on and off for a couple of years. I liked hanging out with my friends during the school day, but after school I needed my alone time. Now I'm fine with not having friends; I actually find it rather peaceful. When I did have friends none of them knew I was gray-ace(even I didn't know until fairly recently). Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 I don't really have friends but that's more because i don't really like being away from home too much. I love being on my own. I do have people i talk to here online if that counts too. Link to post Share on other sites
Min-HaRi Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 Well, I'm an 18 year old college freshman, so I might have an unfair advantage. I still have my best friends from high school and now I have new friends that I made at university. I'm constantly being exposed to people, so making friends isn't difficult. My best friends in high school know that I'm demi (one is demi as well). Link to post Share on other sites
SheWolfGR Posted December 10, 2016 Author Share Posted December 10, 2016 I'd like to come back to this topic and say that I recently started taking courses for a Master's Degree and although I enjoy the classes I really don't feel like talking or hanging out with my classmates in the breaks. I don't want them to think I'm weird but in the breaks they all hang out in the cafeteria and I never follow them or want to but this makes me feel awkward.. Furthermore for our next assignment we have to work on groups of two and I really don't want to ask someone to be my partner I feel like they think I'm a weirdo and don't want to be partners.. This whole thing makes me really anxious. I only talked/hanged out with this one person but I think she dropped the class cause I never saw her again. Just my luck :/ Although I didn't really liked her, I just talked to her to be nice and social.Any advice? PS. Reading this makes me sound like such a douchebag! LOL I swear that's not the case! Link to post Share on other sites
J. van Deijck Posted December 10, 2016 Share Posted December 10, 2016 I have friends here. IRL there's only one person and yes, he knows. Link to post Share on other sites
Sibemarie Posted December 11, 2016 Share Posted December 11, 2016 My best friend is a guy. We've had built a unique, great relationship over the last years, more than one decade. We had great moments together, we had a few arguments, we have been supporting each other, we play, we cuddle, we help each other. He is also my "special person" in a kind of queerplatonic relationship. No romance, kisses or sex ever never. It's actually a truly special and pure friendship and deep connection, and we really need each other, like soulmates (unfortunatelly we are not so much together anymore since i have to work abroad ). I would die inside if something bad happens to him, and he as well. Then i have a few male friends. One of them is even like my little brother i really like him so much as a brother. And a few more, all guys most of time, (very rarelly girls) here and there they talk about girls but is never a main subject and these small group never asked me about "what am i" I love to go around with groups of guys like those with very unique personalities. The fact they are metal/industrial/alternative etc people our conversations are mostly about what we have in common, music, art, philosophy, etc or just go to the garage/studio play music, playing around and joking having fun, drink, etc. I don't fit in common groups of girls. I feel no connection most of times. I dont like to dress up, i dont like beauty product, i hate shopping, etc. Then when i am abroad and there is a group of a few girls i met, coworkers, if sometimes we drink or tell jokes is all fine, but when they talk about love, relationships or sex that's when its really awkward. Thats when i have to do the huge effort and tell half of the story "i dont easily fall in love" or "i like to be on my own most of time" and as everybody here knows, finding ways to escape the subjects that's exhausting. I just dont want to drag attention on me being telling the whole story (i really enjoy to have my personal privacy) I have a few friends who are girls, but we rarely talk anymore. They are together with their guys/husband, they have babies or toddlers, and they lead pretty plain lives (i am an eternal youngster/adventurer/amateur musician/traveller, just cannot share much in common with these housewives or whatever. In the other day i agreed to have a coffee with 2 of them (my childhood friends of the neighboorhood) and when they started talking about their babies, i felt like i was in an alien planet. (i dont want children, neither marriage, and i am not a normal adult so to speak). The girl i really get along with around here is a girl who has a boyfriend living abroad, she is like goth/alternative, very out of the box mind, she likes music, art, photography. we never talk about relationships or sex. She never questione me about it. She's very laid back and cool, it is much more enjoyable to go to a museum, a concert or drink some cocktails and make silly jokes and laugh. Then i have other aquaintances in mountaineering (which again i dont go anymore so much, since i became poorer after Euro crisis and have to work abroad) and mountaineering association is awesome in this - the subject is the mountain, adventures, climbing, have fun, go through dangers. The relationship/sex/love never comes around (even though there are couples/married people etc) andclimbing the mountain is a very asexual environment, guys and girls act the same, do the same activities, dress the same. its a very confortable social environment for an asexual! Link to post Share on other sites
Larkaloke Posted December 11, 2016 Share Posted December 11, 2016 I've got at least a handful of close-ish friends, although I mostly keep to myself aside from interacting with my family. Of those, I believe they all know, and probably some of my less-close friends do as well. I don't exactly make a secret of it, but I also don't generally tell people outright (as with most other things about myself, really). Link to post Share on other sites
Sibemarie Posted December 11, 2016 Share Posted December 11, 2016 18 minutes ago, Remmirath said: I've got at least a handful of close-ish friends, although I mostly keep to myself aside from interacting with my family. Of those, I believe they all know, and probably some of my less-close friends do as well. I don't exactly make a secret of it, but I also don't generally tell people outright (as with most other things about myself, really). Sadly i have to keep away from some relatives as well. They are nice, but they're a little narrow minded countryside people, and often comes the question "So when are you getting a man?", "all your cousins are together with someone or married, you still single at 30's??" or worse, if i go to the village only with my best friend (a guy - my very special best friend, but not boyfriend) they dont get that a man and a woman (signed at birth) can be very close with absolutelly only friendship, so they'll will assume he is my boyfriend and then they will talk about it to my mom. To my mom, he is "like a brother to me" (my parents accept me as i am , however we never had any talk about it, they dont realise that something like asexuality exists, they just think i am someone who likes to be on her own, a "modern person"). Then my mom will tell my family, "no he is not her boyfriend" that will make them wonder if i am just taking a random guy home and going intimate with him and they can start rumours about me...then i get angry, and that's why i also avoid some relatives as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Ducklin Posted December 11, 2016 Share Posted December 11, 2016 I've never been afraid of telling people things about myself that others may be opposed to telling. For instance, when I thought I was bisexual (now I realize I am biromantic), I had no problem talking about it with other people, or correcting them if they got my sexuality wrong. When I realized I was ace, I was so happy that I even straight up told some of my friends, out of the blue. Just ran up to them and said "I'm asexual!! I'm so happy!!!" Though things were never as great as they seemed. I lost a relationship that I loved because that person was uncomfortable when I told them I was ace. We've made up and whatnot, but it's still a lesson learned that I need to be more aware of other people's preferences. I also relate to the part where you said that most of your friends would constantly talk about sex. I agree that that can get pretty annoying and hard to tolerate. But I also understand that not everyone is like me and that I can't be the one to ruin the party for everyone else. The friend situation, well, let's just say I've been through a lot. But I've never lost a friend because of my sexuality, not yet that is. All in all, friendships can be hard, and I'm almost always willing to try to make new friends or try to save old ones. If you ever need a friend, I'll always be available to talk to. I really do value friendships and I try to see the value in other people, no matter what their opinions and preferences are. except for donald trump he can go elsewhere for all I care Link to post Share on other sites
.diva plavalaguna. Posted December 11, 2016 Share Posted December 11, 2016 Eh, not so much I think. I talk to a couple people I met in college via social media every so often, but not at any real length. Maybe I have a stricter view of friendship but it's hard exactly to call them friends, although the word friend seems to be the only one that fits. I don't know if any of them know I'm ace, except for my ex of course. I repost/reblog asexual stuff on fb and tumblr (not fb anymore since I took a half-hiatus kind of thing), so it's kind of a question of if they are paying enough attention to my posts to get it. I haven't gone out of my way to tell anyone. Link to post Share on other sites
mikeman7918 Posted December 12, 2016 Share Posted December 12, 2016 I have one IRL friend, afew online friends, and one friend who I met IRL but they moved away so they don't really fit either category. Link to post Share on other sites
Hermit Advocate Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 I have a few friends. The ironic part is that I'm known to be the introverted antisocial one, I can go for weeks without seeing anyone and am perfectly content, and yet at times I feel as though I am the one putting the most effort into those friendships. Link to post Share on other sites
Hermit Advocate Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 Plus I have all of you to keep me company. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.