Another insecure

[Ascherion]

Some background information: I'm an 18 years old male. I've never had sex, nor a girlfriend. And I haven't been kissed.

I've been kind of confused about me being asexual or a weird heterosexual for a while now. Given how I'm usually kind of repulsed by genitalia in general and I'm moderately touch averse; at first glance, sex shouldn't attract me. And, indeed, I've never thought to myself something along the lines of: ''I'd like to tap that''. However, I've never had sex, so I don't know whether I would enjoy it or not and whether I'd feel attracted to it or not after trying it.

Now, I've read that you don't need to have sex to know you're asexual and I agree that many people don't. But I also feel that, in my particular case, should I try sex and enjoy it, I might suddenly feel sexual attraction. The point I'm trying to make is: even though I feel asexual, I can't be 100% sure until I do have sex.

Now, I currently don't have the possibility or having intercourse. So, to kind of have an idea about whether I would like or not, I've been trying to imagine how it could be.

[The following lines are sexually explicit and descriptive]

And I've determined that penetration, making out, and oral sex are a big no no. However, I do very much like breasts and the female abdomen (my taste here is reduced to a small sample of shapes, looks and textures, though). And I imagined myself touching them and I thought I would like that and it would most surely lead to my arousal, which (I imagined) I'd attend to by masturbating instead of actual penetration.

So, my question is: If, in the end I tried intercourse and I didn't like it, and I kept myself exclusively to this ''breast/abdomen fetichism'', would I still count as asexual?

The fetichism thing is not intercourse, nor sodomy, nor oral sex. But at the same time, it has the end goal of my arousal and consequent ''taking care of it'' so it's kind of sexual after all (or not?). However, masturbation per se isn't exclusive to allosexuals; but when your masturbation is focused on something so particularly exclusive of a certain gender... it kind of looks heterosexual (or not?). But then again I don't like kissing, nor being kissed, nor being touched, nor penetration, nor oral sex (at least in theory) which would make me a very unpractical heterosexual (or not?)... Also, if I didn't have any of this, I'd still be happy having a relationship with little more than some hugging and cuddling (meaning I don't think I'd need to carry this out –unlike an allosexual–) . As you can see, some things point out to heterosexual and others seem to indicate asexuality. I really have no idea of what to think of this.

What do you think? Is it sexual attraction? Maybe a fantasy? Would I still be asexual? Am I asexual at the moment?

P.S: I can also imagine myself trying intercourse but I'm not sure at all whether I'd like or not: I supposedly feel repelled by the moisture and the looks of it and I'm not sure about neither the mechanics nor the smell but unless I try it I can't be 100% sure. Also, I've read and some people have told me that they didn't initially think they would like a bunch of sexual acts, but after trying them, they enjoyed them. So my lack of security stems from this.

[Revlon]

im a noob , but i have similar functions...... im not ( i dont think) asexual.... however we do demonstrate the same style turn ons... and they dont necessarily preclude normal (relatively) relationships.... what you might find is a lower rate of relationsip than your mates but thats fine........ you are young , trust me you will find your niche.

just relax and (subtly) communicate your desires to your partners... kissing is HUGELY intimate for me and i think similar for you..... this is going to be a fair indicator of how your partner feels... i use this as a gauge.. for me if the other cant get around the kissing then i know how the rest of the relationship will go...

sadly we are a minority.. but get happy being you.. and work from there....

sorry i cant be more helpful..

revlon