Can sexuality change?

[123cosmo]

Its been a while since i've been on aven. I thought my dreaded phases of questioning and sexual confusion were over, but life isnt that simple i guess😅 Im not sure what my sexuality really is now, but i know i was ace. I used to relate deeply to a lot of the threads and topics on this site. I knew i had not expierienced sexual attraction before, i felt the negatives and positives of being ace. i always thought people in general looked nice but i never payed much attention to it. But i feel my aesthetic attraction has sky rocketed, and i think i have even felt sexual attraction! Ive only felt this sexual and aesthetic attraction to females (so i guess im shifting towards lesbian?) but im still feeling romantic attraction to both men and women. I know its not important to label every little aspect of my life but it sure would be nice if i were sure of my sexuality! People ask me about it all the time (people seem to sense im not straight but they cant quite figure out exactly what theyre sensing, kinda like a gaydar i guess?) i know i want nothing to do with male genitals! And im not particulary ecstatic about female genitals (though not repulsed). So i guess im just wondering if anyone can relate on really any level :l

[Emery.]

In my politically incorrect opinion, sexuality can change. It's natural. Chemistry in your body changes, you constantly become a diffrent person, constantly change through experiences (like everyone else), and hence so can feelings.

[Blondbeard]

To me you look more lesbian than asexual.

Regarding sexuality changing, I am of the opinion that sexuality is much more complicated than people in this site ot in the street tend to believe, there is one thread of a woman who thought she was asexual but experienced sexual attraction at 44.

Some people can figure their sexual orientation at 13 years old, but not everybody blossom at the same time, I also noticed that sexual orientation in women is more complex than in men

[Blondbeard]

In my politically incorrect opinion, sexuality can change. It's natural. Chemistry in your body changes, you constantly become a diffrent person, constantly change through experiences (like everyone else), and hence so can feelings.

Well, I can tell myself that my sexuality orientation changed, although according to my ex, I never was a true asexual I just was somebody with health issues, she maybe was right and I never was a true asexual but it depends on the definition.

I think sexuality is an spectrum and depends also on the person you are related too, so sexuality is more like an area where you can move, for some people that area goes from ace to gray, for others from sexual repulsed to ace, etc..

[mikeman7918]

Sexuality can indeed change, it has happened to me. Starting at the beginning of my teen years I did feel sexual attraction towards girls to an extent, although I have never actually wanted sex so I suppose that puts me somewhere in the gray area. Over a few years my attraction slowly but steadily became less intense until eventually it hit rock bottom, and now I just identify as full-on asexual because currently I am. The same thing could very well be happening to you but in reverse.

[fissiparity]

I'm of the opinion that latent sexuality cannot change only how we perceive our sexuality. For example someone might be confused about their sexuality so tell themselves they're asexual for whatever reason but eventually arrive at the understanding later in life they are lesbian etc. and probably were all along.

[Star Bit]

Yes, some peoples orientations can be fluid, but it's rare. However, how old are you? If you're under 20 your orientation could've still been developing. Other things can also impair sexuality development such as genital/body dysphoria or negative self perception.

And you wouldn't be gay, cross-orientations exist, so if you do desire sex with women it'd be biromantic homosexual. Being disgusted by genitals is also normal, but sexual arousal can momentarily fog this over and is what ends up letting sexual people pursue sex.

[Guest]

I honestIy don't think sexuaIity changes (except under extremeIy rare circumstances) ..I think what's much more common is we Iearn more about ourseIves.

Something that has never happened before happens to us, and it doesn't mean anything has changed, we just Iearned something new.

I was identifying as asexuaI (in the grey area) but I've Iearned that I am indeed capabIe of desiring very sexuaI interactions with the right person (virtuaIIy at Ieast, we stiII need to see what happens in person) ..That doesn't mean my sexuaIity has changed, it means I probabIy wasn't asexuaI to start with and now I'm Iearning that :3 (I have aIways said very openIy on this site that the moment I desire sex with someone is the moment I stop identifying as asexuaI - though that doesn't change my definitions or my ideas of what makes someone asexuaI/sexuaI in the Ieast)

..So yeah, I think we just Iearn more. Discover things that have aIways been there but hadn't had a chance to come to the surface yet. Just my personaI opinion.

[iff]

I honestIy don't think sexuaIity changes (except under extremeIy rare circumstances) ..I think what's much more common is we Iearn more about ourseIves.

Something that has never happened before happens to us, and it doesn't mean anything has changed, we just Iearned something new.

I was identifying as asexuaI (in the grey area) but I've Iearned that I am indeed capabIe of desiring very sexuaI interactions with the right person (virtuaIIy at Ieast, we stiII need to see what happens in person) ..That doesn't mean my sexuaIity has changed, it means I probabIy wasn't asexuaI to start with and now I'm Iearning that :3 (I have aIways said very openIy on this site repeatedIy that the moment I desire sex with someone is the moment I stop identifying as asexuaI - doesn't change my definitions or my ideas of what makes someone asexuaI/sexuaI in the Ieast)

..So yeah, I think we just Iearn more. Discover things that have aIways been there but hadn't had a chance to come to the surface yet. Just my personaI opinion.

i'd be in agreement. it is an increase in our awareness of our own feelings. for me personally for a time i had used a definition to express my own sexual attraction bordering on demisexual as well as heterosexual, this continues until i started to identify as asexual. nothing in me changed but what changed for me was an awareness factor.

[R_1]

In the early years, I was heterosexual, and while I tried ways to explain that off, every other explanations other than I used to be heterosexual are inconsistent. Inconsistency with explanations other than your sexuality has changed is the key verification for sexuality changes. I looked back to my earlier posts, and I think my former sexuality wasn't really strong until late puberty, and it started dying after the end of puberty. Almost as if it was like it accelerated and then I lost fuel. I really wanted sex back then. My aesthetic attraction to females has been dying, and I can feel that. Probably dead by the end of this year.

[eorion]

In my politically incorrect opinion, sexuality can change. It's natural. Chemistry in your body changes, you constantly become a diffrent person, constantly change through experiences (like everyone else), and hence so can feelings.

Well, I can tell myself that my sexuality orientation changed, although according to my ex, I never was a true asexual I just was somebody with health issues, she maybe was right and I never was a true asexual but it depends on the definition.

I think sexuality is an spectrum and depends also on the person you are related too, so sexuality is more like an area where you can move, for some people that area goes from ace to gray, for others from sexual repulsed to ace, etc..

Even if the reason you dont feel sexual attraction is due to physical health issues, mental health issues, past abuse or age, There is no way to be a 'true asexual' aside from identifying as asexual. An asexual who only started identifying that way because of depression or abuse or anything else are still valid and 100% ace.