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So What Do You Think? Am I Asexual?


LadyMisty

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So, I am a bit confused. I found this website a long time ago and thought, "Yeah, this really fits me, but it can't be right. I was married for 17 years. I had sex a lot to please my partner. I CAN'T be Asexual."

Here I am, back again. lol I actually joined up this time too! I have NEVER really been interested in sex. Especially after I had sex. Ugh. And I have even had an orgasm on occasion and didn't like sex. I have spent every sexual encounter I have ever had wishing it would be over so I could do something that was fun or go to sleep. :unsure:

I was divorced in 2005 and although I was sad that my family was no longer going to be "together", I found myself so relieved that I didn't have to have sex anymore that I also felt giddy with happiness! I do think people are attractive. I just have no desire to have sex with them. Never have. So I am asexual, right?

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Yeah, that sounds like asexuality to me.

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The only requirement for asexuality is not desiring sex with anyone.

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Thanks. I thought so.

Recently my sons are hinting that it's been over 10 years since the divorce. "Aren't you interested in dating again?" I just laugh. I haven't known what to say. I have never shared my true feelings with anyone before because I sorta thought something was wrong with me.

Guess it's just the way I was made.

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Thank you for the welcome!

I am still wrapping my head around this and am not sure if I should "come out" to others. I was at work recently and someone asked me if I was dating anyone. My reply was, "No. I'm asexual." The people around us laughed, like I was joking, so I laughed along and the topic changed. I think that's the biggest reason I am back here on this site. My subconscious must have been thinking it for awhile now - I mean it was a completely spontaneous reply. But the laughter that followed caught me off guard too.

It will be nice to have people to talk with that understand what I mean, as I plod my way through understanding this. ;)

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By saying "no I'm asexual" to "are you dating anyone" it sounds like you have the misconception that asexuality includes aromanticsm. As I said, asexuality strictly applies to sex. Most asexuals are romantic. Not getting crushes/desiring a relationship is called aromantic. Short hand for being both is aro ace.

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