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Teen Vogue: Being Asexual is Totally Fine


Éadweard

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I'm always pleasantly surprised by the amount of socially progressive content in magazines like Teen Vogue or Seventeen. For one, I'm glad they're including more than just mindless drivel about dating/sex/fashion, or whatever like they used to.

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NerotheReaper

I just don't see what's so hard to understand, sexuality isn't that hard.

Some people are straight, some are gay, some swing both ways and some of us just want to draw dinosaurs in peace.

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For example, if you have experienced a past trauma or mental illness and don't experience sexual attraction as a result, then this is not the same as asexuality.

^ Important, but I already know a few people who will hate that.

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Representation in the media is always so cool!

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For example, if you have experienced a past trauma or mental illness and don't experience sexual attraction as a result, then this is not the same as asexuality.

^ Important, but I already know a few people who will hate that.

Actually, that may be more accurately described as sexual aversion. Most people aren't "asexual" and sexual orientation is consistent for most people, therefore, most people who experience trauma or mental illness will still experience a desire for sex with others. It may be that they choose not to act on that desire because of prior unpleasant experiences or because they've developed an aversion to sexual activities.

I don't believe a history of trauma and/or current or former mental illness necessarily invalidates someone's identity as an "asexual" person (just as people who identify as "homosexual" aren't invalidated if they have a history of trauma and/or mental illness). Of course, people can temporarily experience a lack of desire for sex with others, however, that's not the same thing as "asexuality." Just like any other sexual orientation, the desire or lack of desire for sex with others is an enduring characteristic for that individual person. Sure, I believe sexual orientation is fluid for some people, however, those people are a small percentage of the population. I think some of this also falls in the more grey area of the sexuality spectrum.

With that said, I don't think all "asexual" people are necessarily born "asexual" as nature and nurture work together to shape us and our lives and identities. It's highly likely that a large number of factors contribute to our sexuality and that no one individual experience or event (or even set of events) can be pinpointed as a sole cause. Also, it's not helpful to know the origins of any given person's sexual orientation except for curiosity's sake. Unless, of course, someone wants to try and change that person's sexuality or invalidate them, and that's just unacceptable to me. It doesn't really matter how we came to be the way we are, whether that's our love of a certain type of music or our desire for (or lack of desire for) sex with others. It only matters if it helps us understand and accept and love ourselves more.

Also, the article states it's now scientific fact that "asexuality" is a sexual orientation and I followed the link to the research paper and that's an incorrect interpretation of the research (the authors suggest it as most likely, however, encourage further research to support that stance).

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WhenSummersGone

Hopefully more and more doctors and therapists will know this or look into this so Asexuality will be more seen as an orientation, and less a disorder. I still notice a therapist on YouTube still seems unsure if Asexuality is a disorder or not.

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For example, if you have experienced a past trauma or mental illness and don't experience sexual attraction as a result, then this is not the same as asexuality.

^ Important, but I already know a few people who will hate that.

The thing is that definitions and the fact that there is zero evidence that sexuality should be considered immune to brain changes allows for the potentials for people to become asexual, heterosexual, homosexual, and so on provided major changes to areas dealing with sexual orientation. There's sexual aversion to be considered. This is one of those thing one must assess on a case-by-case basis. For example, that guy who had 2 strokes and then lose all interest into the same sex to go with the opposite sex, and he was uncomfortable with that and prefers to call himself bisexual, there's a good case to be made that his sexuality has literally been shifted. And then, we have individuals like myself who don't had medical problems whose sexuality slowly changed on it own, and I absolutely see zero evidence that my sexuality is there or it'll be back, and I have waited just to know that it is verified that my sexuality is gone with no evidence it is there. You have people who tries to pass off as ex-gay, and they are in denial. You also have people who are confused by definitions. So, in short to say, I think this is one of those thing where you need to look at people case-by-case basis because it could be denial, sexual aversion, or their sexuality has really shifted.

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  • 3 weeks later...
Ms.Frankenstein

So, so happy to see this in a place like teen vogue! I dearly wish this sort of awareness had been around when I was growing up.

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  • 1 month later...

I got a cousin that is a model and writer for teen vogue. She's not the author if you are curious.

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