Asexual or just not that into sex (newbie)

[Norhelle]

Hi

Newbie here, so I don´t know if I’m posting this in the correct forum. I´m not an English speaking person, so my English is thereby, sorry about that.

I´m a 23-year-old girl, never had a boyfriend and never had sex. I don´t like the thought of never had sex (embarrassing in the social world we live in now), and I don´t like the thought of having sex with another person. Actually, human contact with a person that I don´t trust 100% is hard, just a hug is awkward. So, it´s hard to imagining myself in bed with another person. When I kissed the few persons that I have kissed, I thought it was really awkward, and didnt like it at all.

When I walk through the city, or meet new guys I always think about how they look, if I think they look good or not, but that’s it. I never have a sexual thought about it.

People have said to me that I´m asexual, but they have taken that conclusion by the fact that I never had a boyfriend, and that I never actually cared about boys. It is wrong to say that I have never cared, because I have. But I never had a sexual attraction to another person (never wanted to have sex with another person)

Being asexual is something that nobody talks about, so I don’t know what it is, or how it is to live with. Is it possible that I could be asexual, or is it that I just don’t care as much as the people around me?

[touching-not-so-much]

Hello and welcome! There are a few mental health issues or conditions that have asexuality as a component but are typically able to be sorted from asexuality as a natural inborn lack of preference. You sound like you have the potential to be asexual, but it's not like it's something you have to decide and label yourself with and then get a test where you're graded. Just look around, talk to people a bit, see if other people's posts sound similar to your own experiences and feelings and ideas. =)

[tgif]

I clicked on this actually because I posted a topic about an hour ago and when I read this, I realized my situation is nearly identical. I don't know for sure, but we both may be asexual. At least it's nice to know someone's like me. :)

[rehearsed-madness]

I'm sexual but have struggled with mental blocks on my sexuality for many years. In my experience, the feelings that arise during moments of sexual contact may not always be the best indicator; I'm sure I'm sexual, but I've experienced aversion, fear, anxiety and discomfort in consensual situations, even during kissing. I've attributed these feelings to my insecurities because I fantasize about sex, love researching about sexuality and have greatly enjoyed a bunch of sex I've had. Ace people correct me if I'm wrong, but I think mostly desire is where you draw the line between asexual and low libido sexual. You don't seem to take sexual interest in others, so that might be related to asexuality. I'd suggest you research other asexual people's experiences and see if in any way you identify with them.