Jump to content

LGBT+ inclusion (and other things?)


ActuallyAPlant

Recommended Posts

ActuallyAPlant

I thought about asexuality once or twice over the years before now, and today i have thrown myself into research. The what, who, how, and especially IF. I've gone my whole life watching the lgbt+ community from afar, supporting, but never felt a part of it. Now i believe i am asexual, and though i know asexuals are part of the lgbt+ spectrum, i feel strange with this new "title". i myself never felt personally victimized or prejudiced. it isnt something id talk to my parents about, not because they wouldnt accept me but because i dont want to talk about sex with them, or lack thereof. do i come out? it doesnt feel like something big enough to come out over. also, i am someone who often gets irrational fears, and right now its "what if the lgbt community doesnt think I belong? even i dont think i do! what if its just a phase?" i do feel quite strongly with the label asexual. i would love to have a relationship with no sexual expectations, and its just not something that comes to my mind naturally. i long for an emotional and even romantic commitment with physical components, just not sexual ones. im having trouble attatching myself to the lgbt+ community. any advice or similar experiences?

Link to post
Share on other sites
flesh-pocket

my experience is very similar to yours. ive never been made to feel victimized by being asexual, or felt the need to come out to family and all that stuff. i also feel a disconnect with the lgbt community, because much of it is focused on sex and romance. i may want a non-sexual, romantic relationship somewhere down the line, but my lack of affinity for either right now makes me feel just as distant from the lgbt movement as mainstream society.

but the fact of the matter is, that the lgbt community is focused on relationships because thats what most of it was made for. its ok to not feel kinship with it and consider yourself a non-hetero marginalized orientation, and still follow and support them too.

i say asexuals/aromantics should be able to proudly call themselves non-heterosexuals and be recognized as a sexual orientation minority. as for whether or not that makes us intrinsic lgbt+, i cant say. but my advise to you is to not feel like you have to throw your lot in with them 100% if it feels forced.

maybe we can just be our own thing..? im not going to ask the lgbt community to change to fit me if i dont feel a connection to it to begin with.

Link to post
Share on other sites
ActuallyAPlant

my experience is very similar to yours. ive never been made to feel victimized by being asexual, or felt the need to come out to family and all that stuff. i also feel a disconnect with the lgbt community, because much of it is focused on sex and romance. i may want a non-sexual, romantic relationship somewhere down the line, but my lack of affinity for either right now makes me feel just as distant from the lgbt movement as mainstream society.

but the fact of the matter is, that the lgbt community is focused on relationships because thats what most of it was made for. its ok to not feel kinship with it and consider yourself a non-hetero marginalized orientation, and still follow and support them too.

i say asexuals/aromantics should be able to proudly call themselves non-heterosexuals and be recognized as a sexual orientation minority. as for whether or not that makes us intrinsic lgbt+, i cant say. but my advise to you is to not feel like you have to throw your lot in with them 100% if it feels forced.

maybe we can just be our own thing..? im not going to ask the lgbt community to change to fit me if i dont feel a connection to it to begin with.

thank you :) not really sure what i was looking for but i was in a hectic and confused place at that time and just kind of ranted a little. it is nice to just talk to others.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Queen of Wonderland

Here's the thing; there're a lot of ace people who don't identify with the LGBTQIA+ community on here, and that's perfectly okay. Its a personal choice, and you don't have to be a part of the community if you don't want to. Ace people here have their own community, so you don't really have to label yourself a certain way, LGBTQIA+ or no.

And about that whole "new title" thing? Discovering your sexuality is a life changing experience for some people, but it doesn't have to completely flip your life upside down. You don't have to model your life or your sense of self around this new truth. Its a part of you, not all of you.

Link to post
Share on other sites
ActuallyAPlant

Here's the thing; there're a lot of ace people who don't identify with the LGBTQIA+ community on here, and that's perfectly okay. Its a personal choice, and you don't have to be a part of the community if you don't want to. Ace people here have their own community, so you don't really have to label yourself a certain way, LGBTQIA+ or no.

And about that whole "new title" thing? Discovering your sexuality is a life changing experience for some people, but it doesn't have to completely flip your life upside down. You don't have to model your life or your sense of self around this new truth. Its a part of you, not all of you.

Thank you I was just feeling so confused but I'm fine now. I just felt a little strange at first. Thanks :)

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...