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On 11/13/2023 at 9:28 PM, AroAceCake said:

What's your overall mood/thought with make-up?

I never wore make-up at all (spare some coverup in middle-to-high school) but never learned how to put on seemingly simple stuff like eyeliner. As a result of politics here in the USA, I got sterilized and from that I went and had this weird sort of moment where I went and got permanent make-up immediately afterwards - almost like a middle-life crisis.

4 sessions for eyeliner and then the artist convinced me to get my eyebrows done (2 sessions). Still not sure if this all means I wear make-up (technically it's a tattoo) but I thought it was fun since I kinda got a high pain tolerance for tattoos and piercings. I mostly did the eyebrows because the artist was nice and I felt they could of used the income.

I just know some might consider make-up as a fulfilling, interesting sort of hobby while others might head in the opposite direction entirely and be happy they don't put any money into it at all. I'm more of the middle, being a tomboy who never learned makeup to eventually doing this on whim to kinda "fit in" in a small way, I guess.

My overall review? Fun if you like tattoos in general, but make sure you find someone who has great reviews and will show their work to you first. Only real downside is every ~2 years I'll have to get it redone, but the ink that was used was a sort that fades well so if I don't go back then it'll just disappear. Not all ink is made equal in that regard.

I don't wear it, never bothered to learn, and I don't own any make up products (besides an impressive collection of claire's lip balms from when I was a kid). The one time I let some girls do my make up I had a mini-breakdown in the bathroom afterwards because I couldn't recognise my face in the mirror. So yeah, I'm giving it a hard pass.

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I've had this nagging background anxiety I've been trying to ignore but keeps pestering me. I'm mildly afraid my best friend will randomly decide to stop being friends/cut me out of her life because she suddenly thinks I have a crush on her and am trying to "niceguy" my way into her life or something. I've lived my whole life having to endure these situations where I befriended someone, then they revealed to me they wanted to be more than just friends. I'm so grateful I've had this person as my friend for this long, and I hope they feel relaxed around me knowing I will never do that to them cause I do. Not. Want that. With anyone.

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LucyInTheSkyWithDiamonds
On 11/13/2023 at 3:28 PM, AroAceCake said:

What's your overall mood/thought with make-up?

I never wore make-up at all (spare some coverup in middle-to-high school) but never learned how to put on seemingly simple stuff like eyeliner. As a result of politics here in the USA, I got sterilized and from that I went and had this weird sort of moment where I went and got permanent make-up immediately afterwards - almost like a middle-life crisis.

4 sessions for eyeliner and then the artist convinced me to get my eyebrows done (2 sessions). Still not sure if this all means I wear make-up (technically it's a tattoo) but I thought it was fun since I kinda got a high pain tolerance for tattoos and piercings. I mostly did the eyebrows because the artist was nice and I felt they could of used the income.

I just know some might consider make-up as a fulfilling, interesting sort of hobby while others might head in the opposite direction entirely and be happy they don't put any money into it at all. I'm more of the middle, being a tomboy who never learned makeup to eventually doing this on whim to kinda "fit in" in a small way, I guess.

My overall review? Fun if you like tattoos in general, but make sure you find someone who has great reviews and will show their work to you first. Only real downside is every ~2 years I'll have to get it redone, but the ink that was used was a sort that fades well so if I don't go back then it'll just disappear. Not all ink is made equal in that regard.

I only ever wear lipstick, and not daily. I can't do eye makeup to save my life, but I wear glasses anyway, so I already have something going on there anyway and that might be too much regardless. 

But yeah, I enjoy it! Some people like to read way further into makeup at large, but in my case? I just like the colours... lol 

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On 11/19/2023 at 7:59 PM, ColdMirror said:

I don't wear it, never bothered to learn, and I don't own any make up products (besides an impressive collection of claire's lip balms from when I was a kid). The one time I let some girls do my make up I had a mini-breakdown in the bathroom afterwards because I couldn't recognise my face in the mirror. So yeah, I'm giving it a hard pass.

same

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I'm a female substitute teacher, and for whatever reason, students ALWAYS ask female teachers if we are married/dating/mothers/mothers-to-be. It's inevitable really. Now, try telling a bunch of pre-teens in a conservative state that you don't need a relationship to be happy. Explain that living alone with no partner or even pet can be nice and relaxing. I try to shrug off their follow-up questions on what my sexuality is because I'm never sure if talking about those things will get me in trouble and put my job at risk. However, I can't bring myself to lie if a student specifically asks if I'm ace. Outright lying is just unthinkable to me. Fortunately, I always have the out of reminding them to work on their assignments. However, the students who absolutely refuse to work can really get on my case about those things, even without going into really inappropriate topics which would earn a discipline.
I don't particularly mind if they're curious, but there will always be those that completely reject the idea, assume I'm miserable, and attribute all my justified responses to their misbehavior to that misconception. It's frustrating because answering one student's innocent question which they then accept and stop talking about can be latched onto by kids who only like learning if it's gossip.

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Moon Sprite

I'm finally able to get a breast reduction. My sister was diagnosed with breast cancer and we have a family history of it so I'm getting it done as a preventative measure but it's something I've wanted anyway for forever. It feels pretty awful to have a huge chest as an asexual. I imagine there are sexual women who feel the same but probably a lot less.

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Moon Sprite
On 11/21/2023 at 11:28 PM, confusedbat said:

I've lived my whole life having to endure these situations where I befriended someone, then they revealed to me they wanted to be more than just friends.

I get really suspicious of people like this.

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CaittMarr
On 11/2/2022 at 1:01 PM, CaittMarr said:

As someone who just started to come terms with being Aromantic Asexual, I definitely noticed my womanhood differently now. Growing up I always struggled with being a woman (not in gender dysphoria way), I have never felt like I had the traits that some the girls around me had. I have never been nurturing or comforting. I quite honestly feel uncomfortable when someone is upset, I just give them unwarranted advice and try to leave. Putting me near a child and I will get physically upset. But one of things that really made me struggle with my own definition of womanhood is my lack of interest with people. Where I grew up and just society in general has taught me that women will find most of their happiness from romantic/sexual relationships. Women will not know happiness until they are married and start their family. 

 

Once in high school My lack of interest and lack of attraction was consuming me. I am supposed to be building connections, that's what my high school friends are so obsessed with. Why can't I make progress? For the longest time I have Identified as a lesbian because women are great. I have always had hard time feeling an emotional connection like a friendship with men. I thought women were objectively more pretty. Labeling myself as a lesbian really helped me feel better. I do feel like identify as lesbian helped me a lot and I still have big place in my heart for lesbian community, it just wasn't me. During this time, I really had it out with my women hood. I felt left out and broken. I felt like I wasn't being good lesbian. I just looked at women at distance I never felt anything for them. I never wanted anything form them. What made me a woman? 

 

This internal battle lasted until after graduating high school and I had more time to myself to think. I started to define womanhood for myself. I updated my wardrobe to how I wanted to look. I learn how to use accessories, and I stopped shaving. These are all physical characteristics, but I also changed mentally. I started to love myself and take care of myself. I found my inner beauty and learned what womanhood is to me. How this relates to my identities is through this process I was able to let go of certain traits that felt women had to be. One of them was being into people. Sounds silly but in my mind, women needed to care for someone in relationship and later as family. That our role to give, it's just how I was raised and how I saw the world. Once I let that go, I had realized that I was not into women as I thought. I just loved women on different level. Now I get to love myself and love being a woman. 

Wrote this about two years ago. 

An update is that I now I have finally built the courage to tell my friends I don't identify as lesbian anymore. As I read through this I still stand by what I said. I do feel that I have really come to terms with me being a women and what it means to me. I even have gotten more feminine  things like dresses (you don't have to wear dresses to be women I just was super against them when I struggled with my identity as a female). These last couple of years I have really stayed true to myself. I have not let anybody put me in a box or try to convince me that I am anything but who I am. I still think women are great and I am drawn to them but now I feel confident to let go of lesbian label. 

honestly kind of funny that in the writing it seems that I have accepted myself as aroace and given up the label of lesbian. It took me actually a couple of years after to do  anything. I was confident in myself online but not in person. Shows how far I have come. I am really proud of myself. 

 

I believe that accepting my identity in other ways has really helped be more confident as a women. 

 

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Theoryal

Why are people allowed to strongly dislike tickling even though some people seem to enjoy interacting that way, but they aren't allowed to dislike sexual stimulation?  I was realizing for me the instinctual reaction is quite similar, very quick sensory overload.  Tickling is horrible, it's way too strong a feeling, I don't know how people think it's fun, and yet it's a thing lots of people seem to do as a way to have fun together and play with kids or family members.  It might cause me to laugh but I'm not enjoying myself, same thing with sex it may cause an orgasm but I'm not actually enjoying it.   Can anyone else relate to that?  

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nickolekuebler
On 3/22/2024 at 12:26 AM, Theoryal said:

Why are people allowed to strongly dislike tickling even though some people seem to enjoy interacting that way, but they aren't allowed to dislike sexual stimulation?  I was realizing for me the instinctual reaction is quite similar, very quick sensory overload.  Tickling is horrible, it's way too strong a feeling, I don't know how people think it's fun, and yet it's a thing lots of people seem to do as a way to have fun together and play with kids or family members.  It might cause me to laugh but I'm not enjoying myself, same thing with sex it may cause an orgasm but I'm not actually enjoying it.   Can anyone else relate to that?  

same

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