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Gender IS NOT Entirely A Social Construct


Chardog

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Don't really ask me how I identify, definitely not as FtM (because obviously I'm not female to male, I'm just a strange person) ,it doesn't really matter beyond knowing where this strange feeling comes from . If you have something like this in your head, you're curious. I'm being half-joking about the whisper in my ghost, because I really have no more sensible words to put it.

How do they know if they're trans without something to indicate it?

There are a lot of things that indicate, that's how intuition works.

Well, watch the video, and you'll get what I mean by the whisper in my ghost and the tone in which I say it.

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For those that feel no "wrongness", how do they know they're trans?

You mean like me? It was a long, meandring, complicated and draining thought process to come to this conclusion. I rather felt like ... Just a whisper in my ghost...

I've watched Ghost in the Shell to death :D

But that gut feeling, that... I don't know what to call it. Unease? No. Something in the back of your mind that your body should've been, what, different? Words fail me :P I sort of understand what you mean, and I'm not one of these people who knew they wanted to be the opposite sex as a child, but I always knew that something wasn't quite what I expected. Maybe it's just a matter of articulating the explanation, I don't know.

I don't know what it feels like to be male, just as I don't know what it feels like to be female. This body that my beautiful, brilliant mind (joke) got shoved into is biologically female, but I'm not, and that's all I know. That's the explanation that I usually use, and other trans folk give me a weird look and say, "no I definitely feel like a guy/girl" (delete as appropriate). Is that because they assume there are only two options, and that if they aren't one, then they must automatically be t'other? Who knows.

I want ice cream.

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butterflydreams

But that gut feeling, that... I don't know what to call it. Unease? No. Something in the back of your mind that your body should've been, what, different? Words fail me :P I sort of understand what you mean, and I'm not one of these people who knew they wanted to be the opposite sex as a child, but I always knew that something wasn't quite what I expected. Maybe it's just a matter of articulating the explanation, I don't know.

I have a hard time explaining it too, so I think I know what you mean. There's a lot of stuff I notice in retrospect though. I remember wishing there was some way I could be a girl when I was a kid. Right before puberty, I thought if I just closed my eyes and wished hard enough there'd be a popping noise and I'd open my eyes and be a girl *sigh*

There's one woman I know who is pretty interested in what I'm going through and has asked me if I "always knew". I have to say no. It wasn't until later, until I'd had more experience with life. But again, it was because young me didn't have the ability to articulate that, and my parents gave absolutely zero space to explore that kind of thing. I spent almost all of my time desperately trying to please them and live up to their expectations.

But hey, you know when you know, when you're ready to accept it. I just thankful that it didn't take me longer. I'm in my mid-late 20s. I figured it out at a very good time. I'm still young enough for things to work really well, but I'm old enough to be relatively established, and independent.

I want ice cream.

Samesies. I'm planning on getting gelato later :)

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Especially in retrospect. I think I knew, but didn't understand. I genuinely couldn't believe that someone would want to be a girl and existance of trans women blew my teenage mind. In my head, everyone would be boys if not for patriarchy... It was more than obvious in my mind. Mistake, I'm a boy and they are girls :P I began writing stories about emancipation from this stupid social system. I wrote a story about a tomboy whose name was Alex :P She smoked, always sounded like she (?) had a cold because of this, was witty borderline rude, had short hair and dressed like a man (almost). She was a stuntswoman. He he. There were a couple more like this ;)

And I want some chocolate.


I've watched Ghost in the Shell to death :D

I almost know it by heart :P

"Akira" was awsome as well, but I watched it just one time so far.

In the back of your mind, that's well put.

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

See, to me, the ideal body is that of a trans woman. We have (or the potential to have) all of that feminine beauty and graceful forms, but without the obnoxious menstruation or any of those nuisances of being FAAB. I personally am glad I am not a cis woman, but I still want to be a woman (in some vague sense of the word), ya know?

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butterflydreams

Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

See, to me, the ideal body is that of a trans woman. We have (or the potential to have) all of that feminine beauty and graceful forms, but without the obnoxious menstruation or any of those nuisances of being FAAB. I personally am glad I am not a cis woman, but I still want to be a woman (in some vague sense of the word), ya know?

I certainly see what you're driving at, but I'd take all of it. No hesitation. When I was very little, childbirth used to scare me, but it doesn't anymore. Having known people who were pregnant helped. And while I won't be able to have any of that myself, transitioning has showed me (rather clearly) that being a parent...being a mother...is something I really do want.

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Funny, I had the exact opposite thought in the other direction.

Its really an eye opener in this whole process to realize the subjective existence of others.

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Funny, I had the exact opposite thought in the other direction.

Its really an eye opener in this whole process to realize the subjective existence of others.

"This fucking beard" - "Fuck you penis, you're in the way... why do I have to die of haemorrhage if I cut this thing off?" - "Oh, great, now my voice is coming from the void empties of space, nice one body, well played."

And let's not talk about the hormone storms Random Rage because of testosterone levels. Those are the best parts of living as a male teen and I always chuckle when FtM people panick with things like "I'VE GOT SO MUCH RAGE GOING ON, I NEED TO RELAX, WHY IS THIS HAPPENING, I'M SUCH A CALM PERSON" and I'm like "dude, at least you are over 18 and are not told "YOU'RE TOO YOUNG TO HAVE REAL PROBLEMS", dude. pls."

God, I think I was a mysoginist in my previous life or I was probably born girl and cursed my body, I understood the lesson. I swear. Stop having fun and middle-fingering me and give me a girl body, thank you, I promess I won't curse you once a month (again) and I won't curse your family if I get easily fat. 'k?

P.S. aside jokes, I swear that I'm convinced that everything is better on the other side and I glances a lot when someone says "WOOO, BEARD, SO COOL" ... jesus. That thing is a punishment, even without society roles, it F*CKING ITCHES and irritates the skin, for frog's sake.

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Except from what I hear transwomen don't get all that because they don't have a uterus nor are they able to get a period x-x

Speaking on a semi unrelated note there is a transman named Joji Grey who used to be on youtube but is an artist on DA these days. He started taking hormones recently(or to my knowledge anyway and one picture he posted on his instagram is that he has a "happy trail" now. Now being that I'm AFAB I wonder if its too unusual to say that I have one ... o_o I get it and have had that since I was a teenager but all my hormone tests are normal otherwise.

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Except from what I hear transwomen don't get all that because they don't have a uterus nor are they able to get a period x-x

I wasn't suggesting they did, I just don't understand why anyone would want to be a woman or enjoy being a woman because I'm not, yet I'm stuck with the body of one.

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butterflydreams

Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Except from what I hear transwomen don't get all that because they don't have a uterus nor are they able to get a period x-x

I wasn't suggesting they did, I just don't understand why anyone would want to be a woman or enjoy being a woman because I'm not, yet I'm stuck with the body of one.

I think it's important to remind ourselves though that some people do enjoy being ____. My brother for example. I have to remind myself that he likes his beard. He likes his short hair and gruff-ness. And presumably, he likes not having boobs. But for me, it's all flipped around. When I was talking to my friend about facial hair removal, she said she could imagine how I felt because if she started to get that kind of facial hair, she would freak out. Exactly.
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I personally don't care one way or another with body. I just hate lack of shape and impracticality if anything. The irritating thing for me is period and body hair.

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Except from what I hear transwomen don't get all that because they don't have a uterus nor are they able to get a period x-x

Speaking on a semi unrelated note there is a transman named Joji Grey who used to be on youtube but is an artist on DA these days. He started taking hormones recently(or to my knowledge anyway and one picture he posted on his instagram is that he has a "happy trail" now. Now being that I'm AFAB I wonder if its too unusual to say that I have one ... o_o I get it and have had that since I was a teenager but all my hormone tests are normal otherwise.

What's a happy trail?

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Except from what I hear transwomen don't get all that because they don't have a uterus nor are they able to get a period x-x

Speaking on a semi unrelated note there is a transman named Joji Grey who used to be on youtube but is an artist on DA these days. He started taking hormones recently(or to my knowledge anyway and one picture he posted on his instagram is that he has a "happy trail" now. Now being that I'm AFAB I wonder if its too unusual to say that I have one ... o_o I get it and have had that since I was a teenager but all my hormone tests are normal otherwise.

What's a happy trail?

A happy trail is the line of body hair that goes from the bottom of someone's navel and down to their pubic hair.

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Except from what I hear transwomen don't get all that because they don't have a uterus nor are they able to get a period x-x

Speaking on a semi unrelated note there is a transman named Joji Grey who used to be on youtube but is an artist on DA these days. He started taking hormones recently(or to my knowledge anyway and one picture he posted on his instagram is that he has a "happy trail" now. Now being that I'm AFAB I wonder if its too unusual to say that I have one ... o_o I get it and have had that since I was a teenager but all my hormone tests are normal otherwise.

What's a happy trail?

A happy trail is the line of body hair that goes from the bottom of someone's navel and down to their pubic hair.

I've seen those before, but I don't personally have one. To my knowledge cis men and cis women can get them. Maybe testosterone might increase the chance of having one because testosterone increases body hair in general, idk.

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Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Except from what I hear transwomen don't get all that because they don't have a uterus nor are they able to get a period x-x

I wasn't suggesting they did, I just don't understand why anyone would want to be a woman or enjoy being a woman because I'm not, yet I'm stuck with the body of one.

Yea I understand what you mean xD I was just thinking out loud a little :p

Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Except from what I hear transwomen don't get all that because they don't have a uterus nor are they able to get a period x-x

I wasn't suggesting they did, I just don't understand why anyone would want to be a woman or enjoy being a woman because I'm not, yet I'm stuck with the body of one.

I think it's important to remind ourselves though that some people do enjoy being ____. My brother for example. I have to remind myself that he likes his beard. He likes his short hair and gruff-ness. And presumably, he likes not having boobs. But for me, it's all flipped around. When I was talking to my friend about facial hair removal, she said she could imagine how I felt because if she started to get that kind of facial hair, she would freak out. Exactly.

Yea I always have to remind myself of that too, although if I don't then my brother will xD He always complains about clothing nowadays and saying that they are trying to make everything so gender neutral. I thinking like "gee I wanna know where you're shopping so I can find these gender neutral clothes !!"

Oh yeah, I remember meeting a trans woman for the first time and thinking, why on earth would anyone want to be a woman? :huh: it sucks. The breasts and the menstruation and childbirth... And then I reminded myself that I was trans in the opposite direction :D

Except from what I hear transwomen don't get all that because they don't have a uterus nor are they able to get a period x-x

Speaking on a semi unrelated note there is a transman named Joji Grey who used to be on youtube but is an artist on DA these days. He started taking hormones recently(or to my knowledge anyway and one picture he posted on his instagram is that he has a "happy trail" now. Now being that I'm AFAB I wonder if its too unusual to say that I have one ... o_o I get it and have had that since I was a teenager but all my hormone tests are normal otherwise.

What's a happy trail?

A happy trail is the line of body hair that goes from the bottom of someone's navel and down to their pubic hair.

I've seen those before, but I don't personally have one. To my knowledge cis men and cis women can get them. Maybe testosterone might increase the chance of having one because testosterone increases body hair in general, idk.

I didn't know that females get that, I'm constantly told only guys get that and that I "shouldn't" have that. Of course after that is the suggestion that I have a hormone problem and pretty much everything else.

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Don't worry Nylocke, I have a happy trail, my mom does, her sister does...

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I did when I was younger (before taking birth control to regulate my broken reproductive system). It has been surmised that I have PCOS, which does tend to increase body hair (and one of the contradictions to me and transition- I dislike body hair on myself!).

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ChillaKilla

I have a fuzzy stomach and I love it ^_^ feels very... validating and non-feminine

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I have a fuzzy stomach and I love it ^_^ feels very... validating and non-feminine

I guess some folks are just naturally hairy xD Now if I was born a man I'd probably be like this dude

http://i65.tinypic.com/msbvdf.png

I went there xD

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Rin-likes-rain

Have you ever heard of masculine and feminine energy? It's spirit science. And no, it has nothing to do with religion, sex, or gender. Basically, The world is alive and follows two basic energy flows. Masculine and feminine. Feminine things become curved, creatve, disorderly while masculine things become analytical, strategic, rigid, and angular. The male and female bodies also follow these basic energy rules. Which is why afab are typically curvy and amab are typically angular. I think this has a similar influence over our personalities. Not dictate, but influence. I think everyone is partial to one, the other, a mixture, or a lacking of these two energies which creates our perception of gender. In the case of non-binary people, some don't even realize they are non-binary because they experience at least a partial amount of their biologic energy. Or they experience neither mentally. See, our bodies and our minds almost never sync up completely. Terms like inner black woman, envying features, having a gender that doesn't match our biologic sex, tell me that we definitely don't sync up. And I don't believe that all of it is insecurities. I am pretty secure, but I often forget that I'm not white because I was raised around white people. And I have definitely been told I have an inner black woman. But more importantly, while my body experiences the effects of a feminine energy as well as my personality and demeanor. But mentally, I am fluid which creates discord between body and mind when they don't sync. I don't believe gender is a social construct. I think we put too many fences around what gender is or is not. I think we are all born as we are. Majority rules does not mean majority is all. Besides, I think we all have an energy cocktail. However, I don't think that always means not cis.

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Oh now we came to spirit science. Well, then.... Guess some of you aren't into more academic way of thinking.

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Have you ever heard of masculine and feminine energy? It's spirit science. And no, it has nothing to do with religion, sex, or gender. Basically, The world is alive and follows two basic energy flows. Masculine and feminine. Feminine things become curved, creatve, disorderly while masculine things become analytical, strategic, rigid, and angular. The male and female bodies also follow these basic energy rules. Which is why afab are typically curvy and amab are typically angular. I think this has a similar influence over our personalities. Not dictate, but influence. I think everyone is partial to one, the other, a mixture, or a lacking of these two energies which creates our perception of gender. In the case of non-binary people, some don't even realize they are non-binary because they experience at least a partial amount of their biologic energy. Or they experience neither mentally. See, our bodies and our minds almost never sync up completely. Terms like inner black woman, envying features, having a gender that doesn't match our biologic sex, tell me that we definitely don't sync up. And I don't believe that all of it is insecurities. I am pretty secure, but I often forget that I'm not white because I was raised around white people. And I have definitely been told I have an inner black woman. But more importantly, while my body experiences the effects of a feminine energy as well as my personality and demeanor. But mentally, I am fluid which creates discord between body and mind when they don't sync. I don't believe gender is a social construct. I think we put too many fences around what gender is or is not. I think we are all born as we are. Majority rules does not mean majority is all. Besides, I think we all have an energy cocktail. However, I don't think that always means not cis.

This video is quite fascinating,

I have too much male energy xD On another note I wonder if this personality test is related.

https://www.16personalities.com/

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Oh now we came to spirit science. Well, then.... Guess sone of you aren't into more academic way of thinking.

For the record, all things are made of energy and energy has a frequency (per physics).. I believe one's gender programming follows that to a degree (and that has nothing to do with the video, haven't watched it yet).

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ChillaKilla

Not gonna lie, I lol'ed at Reptilian's comment

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Oh now we came to spirit science. Well, then.... Guess sone of you aren't into more academic way of thinking.

For the record, all things are made of energy and energy has a frequency (per physics).. I believe one's gender programming follows that to a degree (and that has nothing to do with the video, haven't watched it yet).

I have to wonder why do you bother assigning energy to a concept which has no place within the physical world, and the video talks about left/right brain, assumptions regarding genders, and I only watched it for a few minutes to see if it was funny since I had nothing else to do, but it's a load of bullocks to the point where it isn't even funny. And asides, we do not know for sure about the degree of differences of genders since all the evidence is conflicting at the moment, and probably will remain being very conflicting in the future, and whether this supposed gender programming exists. The two sides as I pointed out are valid in their own ways right now meaning you and I aren't exactly wrong, it seems that right now, we can only try to use our own experience since evidences doesn't seem to be pointing to a direction now regardless of how invalid as experiences are compared to rigorous studies.

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