Autumn24 Posted May 17, 2016 Share Posted May 17, 2016 So I posted an ad on the "strictly platonic" section of craigslist and found a great guy who I get along with really well. We both discussed how we're just looking for friendship, but we've been texting a lot about how much we enjoy each other's company. Well, apparently I was a little too enthusiastic, because now he's talking about wanting to kiss me. We've literally only met in person once, and so I hadn't even gotten a chance to explain about my asexuality. (Maybe I should've brought it up really early?) Is there anything I can do at this point to salvage our friendship without making things super awkward?? I'm seeing him tomorrow for dinner... Link to post Share on other sites
Pi(e) Posted May 17, 2016 Share Posted May 17, 2016 That sounds like a challenging situation. I would say since you met through the "strictly platonic" section, it is very reasonable indeed not to want sex or romance and this guy should be understanding. You could just remind him that that was how you met and you are just not interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with anyone right now (which is why you were looking under strictly platonic in the first place) but really value his friendship. Link to post Share on other sites
Briar_Witch_Hazel Posted May 17, 2016 Share Posted May 17, 2016 I think your friendship has a better chance of being salvaged if you be honest sooner rather than later, at least about not being comfortable kissing him. If you don't feel ready to say you're asexual you could say that it's too soon and that you aren't looking for anything romantic at the moment. Hopefully, being straightforward from the start will help you two get over any awkwardness faster since it's a bit of a given considering mixed up intentions between you and him. Plus, like Pi(e) said, your being in the strictly platonic section is an easy and true fall back that he should be considerate of. Good luck with everything. Link to post Share on other sites
GreyWanders Posted May 18, 2016 Share Posted May 18, 2016 If you're comfortable explaining your asexuality you could do that, but regardless you should definitely tell him clearly what you want out of the relationship (friendship) and what you don't want (kissing or romance). Do not use phrases like "it's too soon", because that suggests that later you might be okay with those things and he should ask again later, which is not the message you want to send. Link to post Share on other sites
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