damage_case Posted May 5, 2016 Share Posted May 5, 2016 This does not go at all with the actual definition of asexuality... But in this modern day and age... an older virgin (probably 30 yrs plus) who hasnt experienced sexual intimacy might be perceived and in many ways can perceive himself/herself as an asexual. The first reaction of someone who hears that this person is old and a virgin is "WHAT?!". But then they say... if you want it you can have it... if you 'really' wanted it you can have it. Although this older virgin might 'desire' sex... which makes him/her sexual... but since they havent acted upon it for SOO many years... dont they come under the asexual spectrum in some ways. Link to post Share on other sites
m4rble Posted May 5, 2016 Share Posted May 5, 2016 Although this older virgin might 'desire' sex... which makes him/her sexual... but since they havent acted upon it for SOO many years... dont they come under the asexual spectrum in some ways. No, but someone on the spectrum might be more likely to be an older virgin. Link to post Share on other sites
HeidiUK Posted May 5, 2016 Share Posted May 5, 2016 Although this older virgin might 'desire' sex... which makes him/her sexual... but since they havent acted upon it for SOO many years... dont they come under the asexual spectrum in some ways. No, but someone on the spectrum might be more likely to be an older virgin. Exactly. Someone may be older and not had sex for a number of reasons, but still want it. That said, I knew I was ace at 22. Link to post Share on other sites
Techie Posted May 5, 2016 Share Posted May 5, 2016 I've never had sex and have known since I was 8 or so that I was somehow different. It wasn't until three years ago when I was 51 that I learned I fit the definition of asexual. The fact is if I wanted sex, I could easily afford to hire a pro and I know someone who could in fact hook me up. But the question always gets back to, why? If I were going to blow my money on sex I might as well blow it on listening to someone read the dictionary to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Jade Cross Posted May 5, 2016 Share Posted May 5, 2016 I think that a person who has never had sex could (its not 100% sure) gradually worry less and less over it until eventually they have little to no concern towards the reality of being an 30+ virgin. It wouldn't make them ace but they could behave as an ace when it came to sex. Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted May 5, 2016 Share Posted May 5, 2016 Personally I would say that age is irrelevant. The most important point is whether the individual concerned has been introduced to the concept of asexuality. I can cite my own experience, where if I knew that asexuality existed at the age of around 18 my life would have been easier. If someone desires sex but hasn't acted upon these desires they may have physical, psychological, or other reasons for not acting upon these urges. As a hypothetical they could be a sex repulsed sexual person who experiences attraction but don't wish to act on these urgesy Link to post Share on other sites
firestring Posted May 5, 2016 Share Posted May 5, 2016 I think you make a good point. Society says that you're a virgin for different reasons at different times of your life, e.g. teen-18 : Most people are virgins so it's fine; 18-22 : it's a bit weird you're a virgin, so you're probably a prude; 22-30 : you're pathetic if you're a virgin; 30+ : you must be asexual because you would have lost it by now otherwise. When really you could be a virgin by choice at any age, whether you're allo or ace. Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Jade Cross Posted May 5, 2016 Share Posted May 5, 2016 The big question is, why is it anyones concern whether a person is a virgin or not and what does not being a vigin even give you? Link to post Share on other sites
Calamity Jim Posted May 6, 2016 Share Posted May 6, 2016 The big question is, why is it anyones concern whether a person is a virgin or not and what does not being a vigin even give you? The only intrinsic upside to not being a virgin is that you can't be used a human sacrifice. Link to post Share on other sites
firestring Posted May 6, 2016 Share Posted May 6, 2016 The big question is, why is it anyones concern whether a person is a virgin or not and what does not being a vigin even give you? The only upside to not being a virgin is that you can't be used a human sacrifice. I hate it when I go on holiday and they put me in a wickerman. :( Link to post Share on other sites
Calamity Jim Posted May 6, 2016 Share Posted May 6, 2016 The big question is, why is it anyones concern whether a person is a virgin or not and what does not being a vigin even give you? The only upside to not being a virgin is that you can't be used a human sacrifice. I hate it when I go on holiday and they put me in a wickerman. :( I hate it when there is an eclipse and my friends leave me tied to the alter all night Link to post Share on other sites
El-not-so-ace Posted May 6, 2016 Share Posted May 6, 2016 Nope, not at all. I've known picky people or those that just didn't have relationships going to that stage or if they're religious and holding out for marriage. So while asexuals might have a chance to be virgins later, there's not that much of a relation. If anything, I've heard that many experimented to see if they'd like it so they're definitely still asexual but aren't virgins anymore! :P Link to post Share on other sites
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