Repulsed by sexual attraction?

[pinky-who]

Is there anyone else out there who's not repulsed by sex itself but by being on the receiving end of sexual attraction?

I identify as somewhere between sex neutral and sex favourable but when someone tells my they find me (sexually) attractive I freak out. I also dislike the portrayal of sexual attraction in TV series and the like. It makes me really, really uncomfortable. Even writing this post and thinking about it makes me cringe.

Does anyone experience similar things?

[damage_case]

Ive made threads which despised the oversexualized TV/movies. Not only do they seem illogical... but sex has become so explicit in it that its like everything around us is porno.

Umm.. Im a man so women generally do not speak up about whether they find me sexually appealing or not. But I do talk to certain women on cam and they do comment about my muscular physique and looks etc. I do feel awkward about it... but hey... gotta deal with it. Im greysexual who wants to be in a relationship.

[UncommonNonsense]

I'm sex repulsed, but also can't handle the idea of someone thinking of me as sexually attractive. It makes me feel way too vulnerable, sullied, and even a little angry when someone says that he finds me attractive.

Maybe part of that is because I just plain ol' don't like being noticed. I relish my ability to be nearly invisible, to pass through a group of people and have no one recall my being there. Being noticed goes against all the effort I put into being unnoticed. Being unseen is a big part of my job, and I know I do it well.... But someone noticing me makes me question whether I'm good at it at all.

I kind of wish, sometimes, that I lived in an era where good manners dictated that no one ever told the person they were attracted to that they were 'sexy' or 'hot'.

[Malyco]

I have very similar feelings. Before I really knew I was asexual (I'm sure I knew on some level), I had a very sweet, loving, long-distance boyfriend. We would talk about all sorts of things (non-sexual), and I felt very connected to him. We hit a rift, however, when he, a heterosexual male, decided it was time to open up about his sexual feelings. I didn't know it was even possible to feel the way I did, but I felt vulnerable and angry when he told me about his attraction. It seemed silly at the time, but part of me felt like I was being objectified. I really enjoyed our time together when he valued me for other things-- my mind, my ideas, personality, etc. (all the other parts of a relationship), but when it turned to sexual attraction, I couldn't move past it. I didn't realize I was upset by his attraction to me, despite to the fact that we're told that it is the utmost privilege and triumph to be considered sexually attractive.

I consider myself generally sex-positive-- I always say that what is done between two consenting adults in the privacy of their own home is their business. But this attitude, I've discovered, does not extend to sexual expression directed at me.

And I definitely agree with UncommonNonsense: I wish we lived in an era where it wasn't appropriate to shout your sexual feelings for the world to hear.

[Fire & Rain]

I'm very sex-positive but I feel icky when someone is sexually attracted to me. Many times even my own partner.

[sindi]

I wouldn't say repulsed, but highly annoyed most of the time. I feel like they ignore all the parts about me that I myself actually consider worth anything, and focus on something that I can't appreciate. It feels like... they don't see me for who I am, but as something that they prefer to see me as? So, kind of objectifying and "othering", I guess?

Not to even mention how annoying it is, if there actually are hints that they would like to have sex with you... (I'm, sex averse)

[pinky-who]

Hey guys, thanks for all your answers. I feel less alone now and understand myself a bit better. :)

[aona]

It's just my opinion, but is it possible that it could me fear more than disgust? You could be scared of the person being attracted to you sexually because since you don't know what this is, you don't know how intense their feelings for you are?

[pinky-who]

It's just my opinion, but is it possible that it could me fear more than disgust? You could be scared of the person being attracted to you sexually because since you don't know what this is, you don't know how intense their feelings for you are?

That's definitely possible and for me I think it's true. I wouldn't say I'm disgusted by sexual attraction, it simply weirds me out and makes me uncomfortable. That also goes for romantic attraction directed at me. I think not knowing and not being able to relate to such intense feelings in general scares me.

[DragonflytotheMoon]

Since I'm somewhat disabled & work from home, I'm online quite a bit. So, I get those types of comments more online than in person. If it seems like a sincere compliment, then, it's ok. If it's definitely crass, where I know it's about their urges & I could be anybody, I'm not at all flattered. Though, in either scenario, I'd prefer they acknowledge my intelligence, humor, kind heart, creativity, etc. I know it's difficult to do, as they haven't interacted long enough with me to discern those things. Still, that's what I want them to recognize & appreciate.