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Can I still have kids?


mathmaster12

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Hey everybody,

Okay, so this is still way out in the future for me since I'm currently still in school, but this question has been on my mind since I figured out I was asexual. Can I still have kids? I know there's is always adoption, but I don't think that i would be completed happy going that route. Also adoption can take a long time from what i know about it. Anyone got any thoughts or info on this?

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If you are fertile you can birth children the old fashioned way with sex, you could use a sperm donor or IVF. Or you could use a surrogate to carry the baby for you.

Asexuality doesn't effect your ability to have kids :)

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If your body works, you can have kids. Asexuality is about lack of desire not ability to birth.

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You definitely can I identify as ace and I want a son and daughter some day. Just make sure you find a good partner before you decide to do so lol.

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People who have sex don't do so because they always want kids, and sometimes maybe sex is for kids, and not because of sexual attraction. Or maybe it's for both, or whatever. You can be technical about it, pollen and pistil style, if you want to carry your own offspring babies ( intercourse, IVF, artificial insemination). You can get a donor or "use" someone that understands, if you've got a companion that could reproduce make kids with.

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Just make sure you find a good partner before you decide to do so lol.

IMO it's better to not rely on a partner at all. I'd certainly have been happier if my mother had just left my father to begin with, rather than having drama in the first 3 years of my life and then no father. The years after that with a single mom were just fine, parents-wise.

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As other commenters have already said, you can still have biological children as an asexual. Asexuality is only about not experiencing sexual attraction, but that doesn't mean you couldn't have sex if having children was important to you. In addition, there are other methods (such as sperm donors or IVF) that you could look into if you think that's something that would work for you.

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Asexuality isn't celibacy. Having sex isn't forbidden at all. You can choose any method you want to have kids, even sex. You don't even have to have a partner, you can find a sperm donor if you want.

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Just make sure you find a good partner before you decide to do so lol.

IMO it's better to not rely on a partner at all. I'd certainly have been happier if my mother had just left my father to begin with, rather than having drama in the first 3 years of my life and then no father. The years after that with a single mom were just fine, parents-wise.

I guess but it is situation based. I am the hopeless romantic so I am just hopeful I guess.

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Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion

I think most of it has already been said. Yeah, you can still have kids. Despite what society would have you believe, having babies has nothing to do with your sexuality. People are likely to assume that because you are ace, you don't want kids. But the fact is that aces are like everyone else: Some want kids, some don't mind either way, and some don't want kids.
My own experience is that I want a child, for practicality probably just one though. I want my biological child, but because I am repulsed, I will never have sex. This isn't true of all aces, you can still have sex if you choose, and it doesn't change the fact you are ace. I have no reason as of yet to believe I might be infertile, so I will use my own egg and try artificial insemination with doner sperm when I am financially stable enough to do so. If, and when, I have a child I will be a single mother. It isn't a requirement for aces or aros to be single, but it is what suits me. I am repulsed enough that the idea of someone's sperm inside me, even through artificial methods, is gross to me. However I want to be pregnant badly enough that I will simply deal with it.

Whatever path you take, I wish you luck on your eventual journey to motherhood

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I have a child. I wanted to stay single and I didn't want to have sex so I did IVF with donor sperm. I always wanted to be a mom and was not willing to give up on that.

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TheStarrySkai

Of course. Just cause you're ace doesn't mean you can't have kids.

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  • 1 year later...
On 13/02/2016 at 10:48 AM, mathmaster12 said:

Hey everybody,

Okay, so this is still way out in the future for me since I'm currently still in school, but this question has been on my mind since I figured out I was asexual. Can I still have kids? I know there's is always adoption, but I don't think that i would be completed happy going that route. Also adoption can take a long time from what i know about it. Anyone got any thoughts or info on this?

We are my partner and I both ace. We wanted kids and we took time to have a romantic experience. We have 2 kids. We all have our own rooms, and we are extremely happy 😃 

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  • 5 weeks later...
On 2/12/2016 at 7:48 PM, mathmaster12 said:

Hey everybody,

Okay, so this is still way out in the future for me since I'm currently still in school, but this question has been on my mind since I figured out I was asexual. Can I still have kids? I know there's is always adoption, but I don't think that i would be completed happy going that route. Also adoption can take a long time from what i know about it. Anyone got any thoughts or info on this?

Also their is surrogacy ? Also their is scientific people looking at growing kids artificial human reproductive enclosures see below.

 https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.theverge.com/platform/amp/2017/4/25/15421734/artificial-womb-fetus-biobag-uterus-lamb-sheep-birth-premie-preterm-infant

 

its in the future tho

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It is a huge job to raise a child and can even be hard for two. I would recommend having a quality co-parent. 

 

By the way, the aromantic side of my ace wife is completely not-present while dealing with our kids. This is really great for me to see, as it could easily be interpreted as “mom dont like me”

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