Mike_Rophone Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 I guess this would be a good place to ask, because its a little more about attraction then demisexuality. I have had this crush for about a year, and although I have masturbated to them before(They have an appealling body, but I like it aesthetically, I don't fantaize about them sexually), recently I've been having more of a strong urge to masturbate to them. We don't really talk, and I am still going through pueberty, so maybe I am developing. Can anyone relate,is this temporary, or does this sound like me developing sexually.(Sorry if you saw this somewhere else, I'm just very confused on this topic). I'm anego, just in case that helps anything. All answers are helpful, thanks for reading. Link to post Share on other sites
SkyWorld Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 Moved thread from A/romantic Orientations to The Grey Area. SkyWorld A/romantic Orientations Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
Snao Cone Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 You could be developing sexually, yes. I think that's fairly common among people still in puberty. Don't fight how you might be changing. Don't force yourself to stick to identifying as one or the other based on how you felt initially. We all grow and learn more about ourselves as we go along. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 So... masturbating to someone isn't sexual? If someone was like "hey skulls, I've been jerking off to you but no worries, it's platonic" I'd be like... you have no idea what platonic means. Link to post Share on other sites
Snao Cone Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 I think it's a common misconception that people think sexual attraction is about intending to have sex with someone or picturing themselves having sex with that person. In Mike's case here, I think he just didn't have his sights on actually having sex yet. That doesn't make it asexual; it just makes it about not being ready to have sex. Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Jade Cross Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 Considering the little education that there is on sex/sexuality, its not surprising these misconceptions, as well as others roam about so much Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 Jade, if you don't mind a brief derailment... you have quickly become one of the most interesting people on AVEN in my eyes... so now I want to apologize for being such a bitch earlier :D Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Jade Cross Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 I wasnt exactly being the most open minded of people and a rather arrogant jerk to boot. I apologize too. Link to post Share on other sites
butterflydreams Posted February 5, 2016 Share Posted February 5, 2016 So... masturbating to someone isn't sexual? If someone was like "hey skulls, I've been jerking off to you but no worries, it's platonic" I'd be like... you have no idea what platonic means. I'm sure there are varying degrees of this, but generally speaking, is "masturbating to someone" something people commonly do? I guess I always kinda heard people saying that was a thing that they did, but I thought they were just trying to be cool. Link to post Share on other sites
Vixrotre Posted February 5, 2016 Share Posted February 5, 2016 So... masturbating to someone isn't sexual? If someone was like "hey skulls, I've been jerking off to you but no worries, it's platonic" I'd be like... you have no idea what platonic means. I'm sure there are varying degrees of this, but generally speaking, is "masturbating to someone" something people commonly do? I guess I always kinda heard people saying that was a thing that they did, but I thought they were just trying to be cool. I'm pretty sure it's a sexual thing. I've never masturbated with someone in mind... Even though I'm demi and have been attracted to people before, I can't imagine myself having sex with them or them just being naked etc. It repulses me. Link to post Share on other sites
nanogretchen4 Posted February 5, 2016 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Most of the time I am not attracted to anyone. I don't get aroused thinking about sexual scenarios involving myself and anyone I'm not attracted to, in fact the thought is repulsive. So usually I imagine scenarios that don't involve myself or any recognizable real people. I can get a little aroused remembering actual sexual experiences with people I was attracted to at the time, but I can only make up new fantasies about someone I'm currently attracted to. Even when I'm attracted to someone I don't necessarily think about them the entire time. Sometimes I fall back on tried and true scenarios. But my mind does always go to the person I'm attracted to immediately afterwards, and I keep thinking about them for hours, so I guess the bonding chemicals kind of work even if they aren't in the room. Link to post Share on other sites
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