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Another 'Am I Ace?'


transistor_radio

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transistor_radio

I’ve done as much research as I can to figure out if I fall under the Ace spectrum, but I think I need a little help or some advice. I don’t even know where to begin, so this post will probably be a giant mess.



I’ve been on anti-depressants since I was about 10. So that’s 19 years on medication (give or take a few. I was off medication for a while). I know those can have sexual side effects, and I’m not sure if that has attributed to this.



Growing up, I watched my older sister and her relationships. Which weren’t always successful, but for the most part she picked awesome guys. I saw the fights thought, and I think that turned me off of relationships and made me more guarded towards people and relationships.



I had quite a few crushes in middle school and high school, but I never thought about sex. I wonder about it, but it’s not something I’m 100% interested in. Maybe one day, but I don’t foresee it happening.




I feel that at my age, I should have this figured out already. Which I know isn’t true at all. I’m overthinking this. And it probably doesn't make any sense at all.



Thoughts? Those of you who take anti-depressants, do you think this is part of it? And how do you go about meeting other Aces in your town?



Thanks for any and all advice you can give.


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I think you are over thinking it too.

If you are asexual now, and it is due to medication, then you are still asexual for the here and now. Whether or not it is caused by medicine is unimportant. If you stop taking medicine in the future and you become sexual, then at that time you are sexual. If you stop taking it and remain asexual, you remain asexual.

It's rare and doesn't happen for most people, but one's sexuality can change over the course of one's life. Tomorrow a hetersexual person can wake up and find that they have developed attractions to the same sex. So no one can ever be 100% sure of their orientation at all times, there is no way to know that there is not something affecting ones thought, the only thing you can really know is the here and now.

If you feel the label fits you currently, use it. If it stops fitting in the future, drop it then. Your identification is ultimately a tool and not something you can ever be wrong about. It is simply your way of telling the world something about you that you feel is important.

Don't worry too much about if it is the medicine or not, just focus on your own private truth.

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I'll chime in and agree with Lost. It's very much about what makes a comfortable fit for you. It could even end up that you look at all the terms, definitions, labels and whatnot, finding none of them gel or align with your own mental landscape.As Lost says, we don't stop evolving and growing as people unless you take an active stance in stagnating your mental landscape (which I wouldn't recommend). I'm on a fairly potent cocktail of meds right now, yes they can make a difference. Even outside of my current regime I've never felt a sexual attraction to anyone. You may find as the medication changes so too does your libido and tastes, flipping this statement around you may experience no change, even off your medication.

The trick is to be comfortable in your skin, everything else can fall by the wayside.

-PJ

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I also take an anti-depressant, but my sexuality always felt the same even before it. But, everyone is different, so I am not sure. I do not know any aces that are at my school, so I have no one to really talk to them about asexuality. Identifying yourself as asexual means you have no sexual attraction. Or, you could possibly be I the gray area, like graysexual.

http://www.asexuality.org/wiki/index.php?title=Gray-A_/_Grey-A

I hope this helps a little bit

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