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Does asexuality run in families?


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EnigmaticAnomaly

I highly doubt there are any genetic ties to asexuality, all of my family (cousins, parents, aunts, uncles) ages 12+ are definitely just the normal heteroromantic/heterosexual human being.. I'm an aromantic (partly demiromantic, I've only felt a strong emotional connection of that type to one person) asexual, unlike the rest of my family.

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If asexuality were uncorrelated to family (genetics are only part of the influence family has), then every family member of an asexual would have a 1/100 chance to be asexual themselves. So for instance only every 100th asexual should have an asexual mother. I've read from far too many people with asexual mothers here to find that to be plausible.

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It doesn't seem to run in mine. Nobody else here that I've ever suspected of being ace.

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My mother would never identify as ace. However I would definiantly classify her as demisexual.

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Not much studies have been done on the topic. I think it's a partial "nature vs nurture" approach.

On one hand, I grew up with just my brother and my mom. No dad and mom didn't seriously date for MANY years after. Mom was never interested in sex much or talked about it, looking back on her behavior. I didn't watch anything weird on tv till early high school. Sex was just not involved in life much.

I'm asexual. My brother isn't really interested in sex or that stuff, judging on his attitude. But he still finds women attractive on rare occasions and even has a girlfriend. We lived in the same household and grew up with similar life situations.

Genetics could play a part in low-sexual interest or asexuality. Or it could be how life was structured. Or just luck of the draw.

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Storm Lantern

Genetics could play a part in low-sexual interest or asexuality. Or it could be how life was structured. Or just luck of the draw.

Well said.

My family generally accepts that my grandfather was asexual1, but got married because his only brother was killed in combat before having children. His asexuality may have been the main reason he and my grandmother were separated.

My grandfather died several years before I realized I was asexual, so I never got a chance to talk to him about it, but he was a big influence on my life before that, so maybe there was some influence on my sexuality that none of my family were aware of at the time2.

Aside from that, I believe that two of my siblings may be on the asexual spectrum, but we were raised in a sheltered christian home2, so it's hard to be sure.

1. Genetic

2. Circumstance

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There's my two aunts. One of them insists she's straight because she had a relationship back in the mid 80s and she's very offended by the asexual questions. I think both my grandparents on my mom's side. My mom...she's SO freaking inhibited and uptight. I wouldn't even want to approach the subject because asexual has the word "sex" in it. She's very religious, but her sex hangup isn't religious. She just has some REALLY bizzaro ideas about how people decide who they are attracted to.

I think that there may be something that may be biological to it. while you say the asexuals aren't likely to reproduce, remember that it's fairly recent in our history that people had much in the way of choices when it came to marriage and stuff. You may not have known that you were asexual until the wedding night because almost nobody had sex before marriage. And after marriage? You probably just assumed it was a chore like taking out the garbage. The sexual partner is in the mood. Time to start staring at the ceiling.

I'm sure my grandmother has no idea that she's asexual. But when she talks about growing up and how she relates to people, yes. But in her day, you waited until the wedding night. And then... well .. from what I hear from family members, as soon as my grandparents had the kids they wanted, they didn't bother with sleeping in the same bed. My mom thinks this is what all married couples did before the birth control pill. Yeah. Sure. My grandparents had amazing tenderness and devotion to each other that was very obvious when my grandfather went to the hospital every time my grandfather got sick and would just camp out by his bed from open to close visiting hours. And she wasn't sitting around worrying. She would do exactly what they did together at home. Read a book and just sit next to him.

I think they were a romantic too. It came off as a weird obsession with being practical. My grandfather bought my grandmother a garbage bin for Christmas. She was very help, smiling and looking at it. "Now that's a good gift. Something useful!" They were just super best friends who did everything together.

Anyway, I think is kinda weird that I have all these asexual family members. I do think there's biology involved because. I don't think I was trained to be this way. I always felt like this. I was surprised that my daughter was all girly and pink before she was two. I have no memories at all as identifying female as a kid. I just assumed nobody really felt their gender kick in before puberty. But my daughter just constantly started craving the pink and the princess and all that stuff.

And as a kid, my crushes were pretty asexual characters. I loved Christopher Robin --non Disney. I especially loved him in those little frilly dresses boys used to wear. I loved the idea of a boy in a dress because it meant that he was not really a boy or a girl! loved Linus and Marcie. They just seem pretty asexual to me... especially Marcie. I loved Linus because he was smart and Marcie, because she was Marcie... sir. Yeah!

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  • 3 weeks later...
Julius the Demigod

I'm demisexual and have a hunch that my mom is demisexual. I also assume her sister is demi. So this is hardly proof but it's likely physiological and recessive from my experience. I also have an ace friend who thinks her dad could possibly be ace but he had three kids (I then introduced her to this model because I thought it may have been based upon secondary desire.). I think that asexuality, demisexuality, and other grey-A traits are genetic but I'm hardly a geneticist.

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I have two uncles who are in their 40s and have never married or even, to my knowledge of the past ~20 years, dated anyone. My sister is also fairly uninterested in relationships.

As far as the mechanisms of inheritance, there are a few possibilities. One would be epigenetics where asexuality could arise from ancestors' traumas (since we know that trauma can influence sexuality for some people). Another would be related to prenatal hormones- genes either coding for their absorption during fetal development are passed on from parents to child, or the actual way the mother's body releases hormones is passed on genetically (I dont think the second way is plausible because it would make asexuality exclusively matrilineal if it's the only way of inheriting asexuality). I have a feeling that if asexuality is heritable, there multiple factors.

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whimsical_dragon

I have recently come to identify as gray/ace (not sure where I fall in there yet). I have three (teen/adult) kids, one is pan/demisexual and panromantic, one is gray ace/pansexual and panromantic, and one is ace/aro.

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