Deleted8888 Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Hey. I'm new to AVEN, I actually just made an account a few minutes ago. I'm 13 years old and I think I am asexual, I asked a few close friends and they said I was just young. Is it possible for a 13 yr old to be ace ?? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WinterWanderer Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Hi, welcome to AVEN! It is possible to figure out you're asexual when you're younger. Of course, things can change over time, so it could be that you'll realize that you're not later on. But that's okay, and even so, it's okay if you identify as ace for now. :) I think if I had discovered what asexuality was when I was in high school (gosh, this makes me feel old - I'm 21), I would have known I was ace then. So no, I don't think you're too young! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
verily-forsooth-egads Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Unfortunately, as far as I can tell, there's no way to know for sure. Plus, AVEN is far from unbiased in terms of anecdotal evidence. Go with your gut for the time being and keep an open mind, that's my advice. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
booksaremysexlife Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Hi fellow 13 year old! I don't think that either of us are too young. Even if you end up not being asexual, it is part of the journey that you take. If you want to change your label later, you can :) Welcome to AVEN!! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ValleyGirl102 Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I am a 14 year old Ace who has always known my orientation since the first time my parents had the talk with me. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Deleted8888 Posted January 11, 2016 Author Share Posted January 11, 2016 Ok thanks guys! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Hobbes! Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Identify how you like, by all means. But bear in mind that thirteen is young. You may find that asexual is a label that still fits at twenty-five ... however. Honestly, this isn't meant to be patronising, but at thirteen you've got a lot of growing up ahead of you. So don't get so invested in the identity of being asexual that you end up tying yourself in confusing knots if you find, three, four, five years down the line, that you start to feel differently. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Elluna Hellen Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 You're not too young to identify as whatever you feel is right. BUT. 13 is very, VERY young and it is definitely possible that it will change for you. Identify as ace if you so wish, but do keep an open mind. :) I definitely did notice something different about me when I was thirteen (though that was more on the aromantic side of things), but I kept telling myself I was too young until I was 23 xD. I wasn't in any rush to identify myself, I suppose :P Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SirEl Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I think that since sexuality is fluid and we all have a minor possibility of changing, you can't ever be too young to identify your orientations. If you discover you're not asexual at 18 years old, or 30 years old, there's really no difference. Of course you could be asexual your whole life. So don't worry about it. :) Welcome to AVEN! I hope you enjoy your stay. ^_^ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 well, as some other people have stated, your sexuality can change over time so i's important to be aware of that and accept that if it that ends up happening. Also your just starting puberty so you may find yourself experiencing unwanted changes to your libido, libido is different from sexuality so if you do notice that your libido goes up, that doesn't indicate anything about your sexuality. Also, yes 13 is definitely a young age, but as long as you keep an open mind there is no problem with identifying as ace even if it's just a phase, and also if you wait until people will be validating of your beliefs based on your age, your going to be waiting a long time. from what i've read around these forums, when your young people will to tell you that your just to young, if your middle aged they will tell you your just going through a middle life crisis, and if your old they will just tell you your just experiencing low libido. people typically have some sort of invalidating thing ( based on your age) to say about you identifying about your sexual orientation, irrespective of what age you are, unfortunately. it's the whole, "how do you know you don't like sex if you haven't tried it" spiel, then if you say that have had sex, people use that as a reason why you cant be asexual. all in all it's perfectly fine to identify as asexual, just make sure to keep an open mind, and it would probably do you some benefit to read around and find out what doesn't mean that your asexual. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
LenaLuthor Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 No, you're not too young. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ShadowKat Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 I was 13 when I discovered asexuality, I'm 19 now and still identify as such :) However when I voiced my thoughts on identifying as ace I got the "you'll find the right person one day!" speech. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Scooty Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 Your sexuality is YOUR sexuality. It's like asking someone else if your hungry; only you know for sure! Welcome to AVEN, by the way! have any questions, concerns, need to talk, just ask! We're all here to help! Peace (and cake), Scooty Quote Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 the thing about identity is that you grow and learn and change over time. it's never too young to find stuff out about who you are. and if some time later you do find out something different, that doesn't mean you were necessarily wrong. I mean, if you haven't felt sexual attraction in your life, then saying you haven't felt sexual attraction in your life is a correct observation, isn't it? :) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
deltaX Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 I think the issue of whether or not 13 is too young to know depends a lot on the individual person. I think some people might be able to know enough to identify at that age (I know I probably would have if I knew about asexuality at 13), while others might need more time to know for sure. People age and develop at different rates, so there isn't one set age that's always "old enough" for someone to know they're asexual. My suggestion would be to identify as asexual if that's what feels right to you, but also be open to the possibility that it could change as you get older. It think this is important to keep in mind anyway, because no matter how old you are, sexuality can be fluid and change. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
PJammaGod Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 Ahoy-hoy Emruss, welcome to AVEN. As other's above have posted, you alone have the hand on the tiller. See how your gut guides you and sail along another river if it has a current you prefer. All the best and enjoy the free cake PJ the rudder stock crafter Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SkyWorld Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 Most people figure out their sexuality during puberty, however there are still plenty of people who are questioning or just haven't figured it out and as sure as some people. Either is perfectly fine. My friendly advice to you though, is that no matter what, just stay true to yourself and don't let anything hold you back or distress you. :) I wish you good luck! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
FerlynnGoldbeard Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 You could totally be ace. The tough thing about gender and sexuality during your early years, is that not only is your body changing, but so is your mind. Your'e open to so much new information, and you're thoughts are viable to change with that information and as you develop. If you feel comfortable calling yourself asexual, then I'd go for it, but you should also realize that you're going to continue developing, and that your identity might change. And change is okay. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Levi Ackerman Posted January 15, 2016 Share Posted January 15, 2016 As far as I'm concerned if you're old enough to question it, you're old enough to know. (This coming from someone who just turned 16 and has been trying to figure this whole thing out for the best part of a year) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kevbot200 Posted January 16, 2016 Share Posted January 16, 2016 It is never too early to discover who are as a person because everybody is learning a lot about themselves. However, you are 13 and tons of events, biology, people, environment, etc will still have influences on you until you are at least 18 or even mid 20s. Those can EASILY change you as a person. When you reach those ages, then you can mostly certain on who are you as a person. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Thranduil Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 I agree with what everyone else has said.Yes, you're young, but the only person who knows how you think and what you feel? Is you. If it seems right, for now, or forever, that's fine. What's important is being comfortable with who you are. :) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Outofthecrowd Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 When I was your age ( now I am 24) I had no idea what sex is all about the whole image was clear for me at 16 lol :3 And defenitly I had no idea about orientitions and at 16 after knowing everything about sex I had unappealing feeling I didn't like it and knew that this is no way a thing I want to do for sure:/ So I think as you can be asexual and know about it at 13 but there are many labels in asexuality maybe you would relize later ... don't worry :) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lost247365 Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 The average age of experiencing sexual attraction for the first time is around 10 years old with a standard deviation of 3.5 years. http://homepage.univie.ac.at/Michael.Berger/lit/McClintock.pdf http://www.education.com/reference/article/development-sexual-orientation/ Assuming a normal distribution this means that ~68% of people have experienced sexual attraction by your age. It is possible you are asexual (and I personally hold that most people do have an innate sense of their orientation from a young age) but there is still a good chance that you could experience an awakening of your sexuality. I would advise, unless you just have an internal certainty that you are asexual, waiting till at least 17 (where around 95% of people would have experienced sexual attraction) before committing to it. Ultimately, no matter your age, your orientaiton is your own and how you identify is a statement you make about what you know about yourself at the present. If you feel it is right do it. if you turn out that you were mistaken, then you were mistaken. There is no penalty for being wrong. It is not like you will be forced to be asexual against your will or anything.Anyway welcome to AVEN! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
A.D.Y. Posted February 7, 2016 Share Posted February 7, 2016 People around my age do talk often about "hot celebrities" and this and that. If we were younger, people will think its weird. If we were older, people will think it's totally normal. That's how i figured I am different, because I am never affected by half naked people like others my age do. But I never thought it was a problem I need to talk to my parents about. I can totally live while being immune to "hot" people. And it's just recently I realised there's actually a word for people like me. So yeah, it's like Lost247365's post. Especially with the Internet nowadays and all that jazz. That is how I realised I am different. (Or it might be that my awakening of sexuality is delayed. I don't know. But if I have a choice I prefer to stay asexual.) I am fourteen, btw. : D Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Hachiko Posted February 7, 2016 Share Posted February 7, 2016 Maybe you are a little too young to know. You will be missing out on some amazingly embarrassing and enormously amusing situations that come with being completely clueless for years. ;) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
HOW DO I DELETE THIS Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 In my opinion: I like to think of it as film certificates (you know, the ratings). Look at the 12A rating (or PG-13 if you're American) - often people over a certain age will find it fine, but everyone is different, so all ages are welcome. Just replace the film ratings with asexuality and boom. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ace_Kat Posted February 10, 2016 Share Posted February 10, 2016 I do not think you are ever too young to know what your sexual identity is. I have been debating if I was asexual around your age, and probably many other individuals have too. If you think you are a different identity later on in life, then that's cool. Identify however that makes you feel like you. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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