Chihiro Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I read this Facebook conversation where a guy claimed that he loved Scandinavian countries. So his friend commented that he should get his girlfriend from those countries to which he replied, 'Never. Women are usually taller in those countries'. Then I realised that in a couple a man is most of the times taller or atleast the same height as a women. Most of the movies too portray couples in same way. What do you Avenites think? Does your partner's height matter to you? Is it a deal breaker in allosexual world? Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Height means nothing to me. I am on the shorter side though and all of my love interests have been taller than me so far. But if one does end up being shorter that really makes no difference to me. I thought men are more often taller than women. I thought that was just like part of how the bodies were made. But I'm not sure if that's true. I'm starting to believe that the man taller than woman thing is a societal construct as well. Like, taller = superior. That the man is the "superior" and should therefore be taller, and the woman should "look up to the man" or something like that. But I've never looked into it, so I don't know. Link to post Share on other sites
Baam Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I have no idea what the whole obsession around height is all about. I've heard a lot on social media that girls tend to like their boyfriends taller?? Apparently it's really hot or something? I don't get it. Makes no sense to me. So to me, no, height doesn't matter. But then again gender doesn't matter to me either, so maybe that's just two things that I'm in the minority about? Link to post Share on other sites
SithLord Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I remember in 9th grade my class was asked what we looked for in a partner. I don't remember why, it was an English class, but 100% of the girls agreed that they wanted a boyfriend who was taller than them. About 60% of the boys agreed they wanted a girlfriend shorter than them. Not sure why, but it was the only thing I agreed with them on since I wasn't interested in boys and still am not very interested in dating in general. Now I don't really care since I've gotten more confident and like being dominant, and being taller than a partner would mean I can be the bigger spoon more comfortably. ^_^ Link to post Share on other sites
.,. Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 A friend told me about a common friend of ours, that she had said she really like liked me, until she realised I was shorter than her. It was literally the deal breaker. I'm not saying I would have been interested, I wouldn't have been. But height definitely matters to many. It seems males generally want shorter partners, while females generally want taller ones. I guess it's about protecters, and protectees? Deviations: of course they exist, in large quantities do people not adhere to this. Myself, if I'd want a partner, which I don't, height would never have been a deal breaker (I've only been involved romantically with women who were at least 10 cm shorter than me, by coincidence I reckon, but my guess therefore isn't that qualified as to how I'd react to a taller woman and whether or not the factor of her height would break the deal). Link to post Share on other sites
levelskid Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Taller/shorter. Wouldn't matter to me. Physically speaking, they have their perks, but I would be more comfortable if the girl is comfortable in her own skin. Males are generally taller, so media and stuff often show the man being taller and this seemingly gets into peoples' heads. There are reversed situations and they should be good too, but because of this expectation, much like how some sexuals feel bummed out about dating some asexuals, a lot of relationships end without a good reason. Link to post Share on other sites
Davehat Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I like really tall women. I also like really dinky short women. I guess I'm just a person of extremes. Have to say though that my ex was 6 foot tall same as me and it was awesome as she was a total tomboy and I could borrow her clothes Link to post Share on other sites
Light02 Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I don't really understand why so many girls like tall guys, I've personally always been very attracted to short guys. Maybe it has something to do with me being incredibly short and totally loving it? (I'm 5'1) Idk. I just like shortness, being short and other short people. Link to post Share on other sites
RoseGoesToYale Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 The way I see it, if I get a partner who's taller than me, I'll get to receive bear hugs. If I get a partner who's shorter than me, I get to give bear hugs. Either way, a win-win situation. :) Then, I'm on the short side, so most people are taller than me. Link to post Share on other sites
arthurh Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 No height doesn't mean as much as people like to say it does. Some people prefer a certain height but that doesn't mean their partner has to be that specific height. Believe me from the things I have heard some of the people around me say as long as they are attractive in their eyes they could care less about height. Even then im sure their standards are lower than they want to make you believe. Personally I am 6 foot 4 and I would be perfectly ok with a girl taller than me because we would intimidate everyone and it would be funny. Link to post Share on other sites
m4rble Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I had a friend in high school who was around 5'9 or so and said she wouldn't date a guy shorter than her. Personally, I don't think it matters. Link to post Share on other sites
anodyneinsect Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I am short so all of my dates have been taller than me. I will say that because I believe in fantasy play where I am an insect or a virus I would never even notice that my partner is taller or shorter. I do not care about what people look like I just care if they are good at roleplaying, having fun and compassionate. Link to post Share on other sites
Raina. Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I like it when a girl is about the same height as me? It's cute. But that's cause I'm 5'1 and everyone is always taller than me. But I honestly couldn't care less! Link to post Share on other sites
Arethusa Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 When I was growing up (assigned male), my parents wanted to go to serious lengths to address the fact that my height was consistently in the bottom decile, largely because they were worried that I would have trouble finding a girlfriend as a short dude. At one point, there was even discussion of putting me on hormones to delay my puberty so that my body would have more time to grow. I resisted and fought hard against it at every step, and ultimately they and the doctor listened to me, gave up, and let me grow to my natural height of 1.65m (5'5"). I suspect that one reason why I fought so hard against it was that I subconsciously 'knew' I was trans and didn't want my body to become super-masculine. Personally speaking, I have no preference over height, but I guess it's so ingrained in the way relationships are portrayed and the gender expectation that the man's job is to protect the woman that many people, girls especially, internalise it without really thinking it through. And then it becomes self-enforcing: it's always an uphill battle to speak out against the majority, so many people who might not really care, if all else were the same, go with the flow. Link to post Share on other sites
Vivaldi Ives Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I'd prefer my partner to be within a few inches of my height. I really like hugging people close to my height, so we can more or less put our heads on each other's shoulder. I wouldn't care if a guy is shorter than me. I think short guys are cute. :) Link to post Share on other sites
SkyWorld Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I honestly don't even understand why height would matter for anything. It's kind of sad... not just for tall women, but also for short guys. I don't see anything wrong with a short guy and a tall woman. I don't think it's odd and they just seem to be just like another couple. I don't see what's the big deal and why height (something that you can't really control much) gets in the way. It's pretty confusing... Link to post Share on other sites
Mermaidy Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Height doesn't matter to me, but rather how capable someone is of defending/protecting me. Height may mean someone is more capable of that if they're bigger than me maybe, but there are more factors. In my ideal relationship I want it to entail each of us protecting each other (physically, mentally, etc). I do what I can myself to make me strong for myself as well as for others, and I'd feel safest with someone else who's the same in that regard. As for sexuals, I think a lot of (regarding heterosexuals i guess) the women prefer taller men because wouldnt that mean, generally, that the men are more capable of taking care of the women? (that primal aspect of everything). maybe its a subconcious thing like that. plenty of people of all sexualities don't care about height. It seems to me that the huge focus on height is a trending thing atm. Link to post Share on other sites
EmilyDora Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 It depends. At first, when I just meet someone or see them, their height is something I probably notice only if they are obviously taller or shorter than average, comparing to others around them. But I'm usually not thinking about that as a good or bad thing, and I'm often not thinking about that, just aware in the sense that I might be able to pick them from a lineup of different-heighted people. It's a relative kind of preference, and I don't have one that takes any priority over finding a SoulMate. There are so many more important qualities to notice about someone. The person who gives me a smile or is patient with another or is endearing in some way, does something kind, shares a joke with me,.... Perhaps if I met a wonderful man who was invisible, it might be a challenge; I really would miss not having touch. But if his voice stayed with me, that would be some consolation, but I don't think I would be happy about that. Like if Horton fell in love with a Who: not a good match. On the other hand, when I realize that I don't like someone, it doesn't matter any of their other qualities to me: I don't like them - no height would be a perfect height for them in my eyes. Link to post Share on other sites
LVG Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I'm only 5'1, so the majority of people are taller than me, but I admit, I do prefer a guy on the taller side. It's a protection thing, I guess. I feel safer with a bigger guy. I do have my limits, though. The last guy I dated was 6'4! He gave incredible bear hugs, and I felt incredibly safe walking through town at night with him at my side. But we looked ridiculous standing next to each other, and I couldn't kiss him standing up, even in heals. However, I would never turn down a guy because he wasn't a certain height, especially if we're compatible. Link to post Share on other sites
Philip027 Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 The most common opinion I've found among those for whom height *does* matter is that the female is usually uncomfortable with being taller than the male (or that the male is uncomfortable with being shorter than the female). I'm guessing at least part of the reason for this is the whole patriarchal mindset slyly enforced by society which dictates males have to be the more dominant, protective sort. Personally, it has zero bearing on me. I do kinda admire particularly tall people (of either sex) but it has no effect on how I would feel toward a person romantically, same as with any other physical attribute. Link to post Share on other sites
scarletlatitude Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I prefer shorter men actually... because I'm small and larger people kind of freak me out. But I wouldn't be against loving a tall person. It's never made sense to me either, why everyone cares so much about height. If you really love the person it shouldn't matter. Link to post Share on other sites
Mysterywriter221 Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Personally I would like either a taller partner or a stable step ladder. At least one of us has to be able to get things off high shelves. Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Height doesn't matter to me in a partner. But being 5'11" (about 180cm or so?) I don't encounter many women taller than me. Anyway, there are a LOT of other things in a partner that are more important to me (like intelligence, sense of humor, kindness, etc., etc.), even when it comes to appearance/aesthetics. Link to post Share on other sites
Squirrel Combat Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I actually prefer girls that are a little shorter. Or if there were two women I could choose from and one was taller than me, I would be more attracted to the shorter one, regardless of whether we were compatible. I don't think it has much to do with society or anything, but that's just how I'm wired. Link to post Share on other sites
JAKQ7111 Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I generally prefer partners who are my height or taller. The first two people I dated were both shorter than me by several inches, and I didn't realize just how much I preferred taller folks until I caught my reflection in the mirror when I hugged my second partner goodbye once. She was only three inches shorter, but it still looked like I was towering over her in a way that made me really uncomfortable. Part of this is probably gender dysphoria, and another part is my intense discomfort over feeling/looking dominant and threatening. Link to post Share on other sites
ChainSmokingBob Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Personally I am 6 foot 4 and I would be perfectly ok with a girl taller than me because we would intimidate everyone and it would be funny. I'm 6'7" myself and think this would be a truly hilarious situation. The idea of being with someone who is a similar height and strolling through a crowd is amusing. I don't mind a partner of any height, though I always seem to be interested in people significantly shorter than I am. I don't always like being massively taller than a partner though -- I just feel it could be more natural and comfortable to be with someone of a comparable height. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I don't much care about height but, I can think of a few reasons people do. 1) Women want "strong" men in tradition, so taller. And two is tmi... Certain sexual positions are difficult if the sizes are a bad match. So, if they like a certain sexual position, they will want a proper match. And three is aesthetics Link to post Share on other sites
FerlynnGoldbeard Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I will only ever care about height when I can't reach something. Link to post Share on other sites
Autumn Season Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 I'd prefer my partner to be within a few inches of my height. I really like hugging people close to my height, so we can more or less put our heads on each other's shoulder. I wouldn't care if a guy is shorter than me. I think short guys are cute. :) This! It's also easier to talk with somebody of a similar height. I'm tired of pain in the neck. Not sure how I would react to a guy shorter than me. I'd have to meet one first, haha. When I'm in the company of a shorter girl it already messes with my mind, simply because I am not used to looking down. Link to post Share on other sites
maryjanewatson Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Height is important to me. I don't like being taller than people, for one. But my big thing is feeling protected. I feel more protected by a guy who is taller than me. I would prefer someone 6 inches to a foot taller than me, but I'm pretty tall myself, so it's difficult to find someone significantly taller than me. Link to post Share on other sites
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