Aporagender and other genders

[Wallflowerbaby13]

Ok. I just found this term like a week ago,

and a couple other terms with gender that I had never heard before, and it made me so happy and excited! Since the end of middle school and highschool I have struggled with gender. What it means, what it means to me. So much so that I was much more concerned with that than my sexuality(or Asexuality) in highschool. Now the definition of Aporagender that someone coined a few years ago is "someone whose gender is separate from male, female and everything in between, while still having a very gendered feeling." now I really like this a lot except for the fact that they use male and female in terms of gender. I see male and female and intersex as just that, a sex. What your chromosomes and physical genitalia look like. While gender is what you feel like you are and identify with. More about your mind and spirit. Does this bother anyone else? Am I wrong in my understanding? now I also came across the term Maverique.(which I almost forgot about) defined as "characterized as autonomy and inner conviction regarding a sense of self that is entirely independent of male/masculinity,female/femininity or anything that derives from the two while still being neither without a gender nor of a neutral gender" whew! That was a lot of text! Sorry! I think they are very alike, but I think maverique is much better worded and I think I identify most with this! I also saw the terms gray gender, pan gender, and poly gender. Which having known them in a sexuality sense I can't believe I never thought about them for gender! Not sure what I was getting at, but I hope maybe these new terms will open eyes and help others as it has done for me!

[ItWasNiceKnowingYou]

I agree that i see the words 'male' and 'female' referring to one's birth sex.

That makes so much sense!!! I haven't been able to define my gender (even though I have one). It doesn't fall on any masculine or feminine scale. I just used kaigendered/genderweird because I haven't seen a better term for it.....until now!!! Maverique sounds amazingly perfect!!!!

I'll have to look deeper into it...Thanks for sharing!! :D

[AVEN #1 fan]

Well I think genders works in 3 ways, being masculine or being feminine or not being able to be called either, that last option opens a variety of concepts like having no gender identity (agender), wanting a blank (neutral) gender identity (neutrois), wanting to be btw masculine and feminine (intergender), and wanting to have 2 gender identities simultaneously (bigender, polygender, pangender, 2-spirits).

We also have people that sometimes have a gender, but at the majority of times doesn't (graygender).

People whose genders change when they feel like (genderfluid).

And people who identify partially with a gender identity (demigender).

Also we have epicene, a gender that displays male and female qualities, yet is neither.

And of course we cannot forget about the cisgenders, the Transgenders and the amalgagender.

Sry but believing in a third gender in my opinion is kinda stupid, bc we already have a variety of genders and I don't believe there's anything that can range outside from all those terms, no offense to third gendered persons.

I think maverique is like "I have my own gender", seems like a synonymous for third gender.

Your thoughts about genders are right anyway, nothing is related tbh, gender, sex, body appearance, chromosomes, orientations, none has to do one with another, u can't relate anything or call it exclusively masculine or exclusively feminine.

We also have theorical genders like cis-genderless, people with this gender follow their gender identity however they wouldn't care if they woke up as the opposite sex or anything besides their sex.

[Ricki]

Quite interesting, though my issue is I don't have the foggiest how one determines which gender they identify as. How do you know if you 'feel male' or 'feel both female and male'?

maybe I'm just being dense :D

[AVEN #1 fan]

Quite interesting, though my issue is I don't have the foggiest how one determines which gender they identify as. How do you know if you 'feel male' or 'feel both female and male'?

maybe I'm just being dense :D

Well u like to act like them and do things that are usually related to them, like gender roles, u also like to be viewed as both, and likes to be referred with both pronouns. U don't rly have to follow all those prerequisites.

[Wallflowerbaby13]

Wow! That is amazing to hear SimplyAce! I am still not used to sharing these types of things, but I am so happy that it may help others as it has me! Perhaps you may make a post as well after researching to share your feelings on the subject? Seems maybe these terms are pretty unknown still!

[Certified Cake Decorator]

I id as Maverique. And i loved when i first found the term on QueerAsCat's youtube channel :)

And aporagender is nice too. Like the umbrella above Maverique

[Qwerty321]

In my opinion, there are only two gender markers: masculinity and femininity, and their absense is gender neutrality. All genders is about distribution and intensivity of those markers. It's like a triangle, that have three angles: male (close to 100% masculinity), female (close to 100% femininity), neutrois (close to 100% gender neutrality, about 0% of masculinity and femininity), and many other variants, that lie on the sides of the triangle or inside of it: androgyne (close to 50/50 masculinity and femininity),demiboy and demigirl (close to 50% masculinity or femininity and 50% neutrality), demiandrogyne (masculinity, femininity and neutrality in rather equal amount, the center of our triangle), and everything in between. Another thing is a connection between a person and their gender: from a very strong ("my gender is very important for me" to zero connection ("I don't care about my gender and don't feel it at all").

I don't understand, how there can be another genders and gender identities that not related to masculinity or femininity or being free of them. It's like say: "My hair colour is my gender" or "my profession is my gender". There are many identities beyond gender identities, why people want to mix them?

[Emery.]

Quite interesting, though my issue is I don't have the foggiest how one determines which gender they identify as. How do you know if you 'feel male' or 'feel both female and male'?

maybe I'm just being dense :D

Yeah, this is a major issue with gender identities... I don't know either :P Not that I haven't given to it much thought, but gender is blurred, relative and confusing in its essence.

I guess that following a whim is the best way to choose your gender ;) No, really, the identities serve comfort, so just follow what feels best, or what makes most sense to you personally.

[AVEN #1 fan]

Quite interesting, though my issue is I don't have the foggiest how one determines which gender they identify as. How do you know if you 'feel male' or 'feel both female and male'?

maybe I'm just being dense :D

Yeah, this is a major issue with gender identities... I don't know either :P Not that I haven't given to it much thought, but gender is blurred, relative and confusing in its essence.

I guess that following a whim is the best way to choose your gender ;) No, really, the identities serve comfort, so just follow what feels best, or what makes most sense to you personally.

Ain't there a gender to who has no idea of their gender?

[Emery.]

Quite interesting, though my issue is I don't have the foggiest how one determines which gender they identify as. How do you know if you 'feel male' or 'feel both female and male'?

maybe I'm just being dense :D

Yeah, this is a major issue with gender identities... I don't know either :P Not that I haven't given to it much thought, but gender is blurred, relative and confusing in its essence.

I guess that following a whim is the best way to choose your gender ;) No, really, the identities serve comfort, so just follow what feels best, or what makes most sense to you personally.

Ain't there a gender to who has no idea of their gender?

Maybe *shrug*

[AVEN #1 fan]

Quite interesting, though my issue is I don't have the foggiest how one determines which gender they identify as. How do you know if you 'feel male' or 'feel both female and male'?

maybe I'm just being dense :D

Yeah, this is a major issue with gender identities... I don't know either :P Not that I haven't given to it much thought, but gender is blurred, relative and confusing in its essence.

I guess that following a whim is the best way to choose your gender ;) No, really, the identities serve comfort, so just follow what feels best, or what makes most sense to you personally.

Ain't there a gender to who has no idea of their gender?

Maybe *shrug*

Quite interesting, though my issue is I don't have the foggiest how one determines which gender they identify as. How do you know if you 'feel male' or 'feel both female and male'?

maybe I'm just being dense :D

Yeah, this is a major issue with gender identities... I don't know either :P Not that I haven't given to it much thought, but gender is blurred, relative and confusing in its essence.

I guess that following a whim is the best way to choose your gender ;) No, really, the identities serve comfort, so just follow what feels best, or what makes most sense to you personally.

Ain't there a gender to who has no idea of their gender?

Maybe *shrug*

I think apogender works fine.

[ItWasNiceKnowingYou]

I don't understand, how there can be another genders and gender identities that not related to masculinity or femininity or being free of them. It's like say: "My hair colour is my gender" or "my profession is my gender". There are many identities beyond gender identities, why people want to mix them?

Well I don't know necessarily 'how' it happens but it does.

Genders or gender identities are about the words people want to use & that they believe better represents their feelings or better represents their 'gender'. Gender is about feelings and how you view yourself. So I look at it as one's physical sex may have markers but your feelings don't.

That's just my opinion :D

[AVEN #1 fan]

I don't understand, how there can be another genders and gender identities that not related to masculinity or femininity or being free of them. It's like say: "My hair colour is my gender" or "my profession is my gender". There are many identities beyond gender identities, why people want to mix them?

Well I don't know necessarily 'how' it happens but it does.

Genders or gender identities are about the words people want to use & that they believe better represents their feelings or better represents their 'gender'. Gender is about feelings and how you view yourself. So I look at it as one's physical sex may have markers but your feelings don't.

That's just my opinion :D

But still ur gender influence ur sex. Like a Transgender will try to be a transexual and a neutrois will try to be a sexless.

[Dodecahedron314]

I don't understand, how there can be another genders and gender identities that not related to masculinity or femininity or being free of them. It's like say: "My hair colour is my gender" or "my profession is my gender". There are many identities beyond gender identities, why people want to mix them?

Well I don't know necessarily 'how' it happens but it does.

Genders or gender identities are about the words people want to use & that they believe better represents their feelings or better represents their 'gender'. Gender is about feelings and how you view yourself. So I look at it as one's physical sex may have markers but your feelings don't.

That's just my opinion :D

But still ur gender influence ur sex. Like a Transgender will try to be a transexual and a neutrois will try to be a sexless.

Not necessarily--dysphoria is not a requirement to be transgender, so it's entirely possible to be trans and have a gender identity that has nothing to do with your body, as far as I know. There are indeed genders with no connection to femininity, masculinity, neutrality, or the absence thereof, so what would people who identify as those "try" to be? I think the reason this is often a point of confusion is that (a) there are many trans people who do experience dysphoria and so people think the two are necessarily inherent parts of each other, and (b) people who have gender identities that have no binary components whatsoever still generally tend to be read as somewhere on the binary at first glance, because it's hard to present/be recognized as something that most people don't realize exists, and so even if that person doesn't have any masculinity, femininity, or neutrality in their identity, they may still try to do things that are associated with unexpected components of those three "main" recognized gendery things in order to shake traditionally gendered expectations in whatever way they can, which can often be mistaken for a sign of dysphoria but in fact doesn't have to be. I don't have the answers for how all this works, but I think limiting the set of "believable" genders to variations on masculinity, femininity, and neutrality is a rather narrow view to take.

[AVEN #1 fan]

I don't understand, how there can be another genders and gender identities that not related to masculinity or femininity or being free of them. It's like say: "My hair colour is my gender" or "my profession is my gender". There are many identities beyond gender identities, why people want to mix them?

Well I don't know necessarily 'how' it happens but it does.

Genders or gender identities are about the words people want to use & that they believe better represents their feelings or better represents their 'gender'. Gender is about feelings and how you view yourself. So I look at it as one's physical sex may have markers but your feelings don't.

That's just my opinion :D

But still ur gender influence ur sex. Like a Transgender will try to be a transexual and a neutrois will try to be a sexless.

Not necessarily--dysphoria is not a requirement to be transgender, so it's entirely possible to be trans and have a gender identity that has nothing to do with your body, as far as I know. There are indeed genders with no connection to femininity, masculinity, neutrality, or the absence thereof, so what would people who identify as those "try" to be? I think the reason this is often a point of confusion is that (a) there are many trans people who do experience dysphoria and so people think the two are necessarily inherent parts of each other, and (b) people who have gender identities that have no binary components whatsoever still generally tend to be read as somewhere on the binary at first glance, because it's hard to present/be recognized as something that most people don't realize exists, and so even if that person doesn't have any masculinity, femininity, or neutrality in their identity, they may still try to do things that are associated with unexpected components of those three "main" recognized gendery things in order to shake traditionally gendered expectations in whatever way they can, which can often be mistaken for a sign of dysphoria but in fact doesn't have to be. I don't have the answers for how all this works, but I think limiting the set of "believable" genders to variations on masculinity, femininity, and neutrality is a rather narrow view to take.

But still society only see men, women, androgyne, crossdresser and null. It's kinda hard to distinguish things that range outside those manifestations of gender.

[ItWasNiceKnowingYou]

I don't understand, how there can be another genders and gender identities that not related to masculinity or femininity or being free of them. It's like say: "My hair colour is my gender" or "my profession is my gender". There are many identities beyond gender identities, why people want to mix them?

Well I don't know necessarily 'how' it happens but it does.

Genders or gender identities are about the words people want to use & that they believe better represents their feelings or better represents their 'gender'. Gender is about feelings and how you view yourself. So I look at it as one's physical sex may have markers but your feelings don't.

That's just my opinion :D

But still ur gender influence ur sex. Like a Transgender will try to be a transexual and a neutrois will try to be a sexless.

Not necessarily--dysphoria is not a requirement to be transgender, so it's entirely possible to be trans and have a gender identity that has nothing to do with your body, as far as I know. There are indeed genders with no connection to femininity, masculinity, neutrality, or the absence thereof, so what would people who identify as those "try" to be? I think the reason this is often a point of confusion is that (a) there are many trans people who do experience dysphoria and so people think the two are necessarily inherent parts of each other, and (b) people who have gender identities that have no binary components whatsoever still generally tend to be read as somewhere on the binary at first glance, because it's hard to present/be recognized as something that most people don't realize exists, and so even if that person doesn't have any masculinity, femininity, or neutrality in their identity, they may still try to do things that are associated with unexpected components of those three "main" recognized gendery things in order to shake traditionally gendered expectations in whatever way they can, which can often be mistaken for a sign of dysphoria but in fact doesn't have to be. I don't have the answers for how all this works, but I think limiting the set of "believable" genders to variations on masculinity, femininity, and neutrality is a rather narrow view to take.

But still society only see men, women, androgyne, crossdresser and null. It's kinda hard to distinguish things that range outside those manifestations of gender.

In my opinion, binary genders are societal constructs & making the only accepted/acknowledged genders be variations of those two (or neutral) is not fair & open as it should be. The only reason distinguishing things that range outside these is because you can't expect to understand such genders with the limited mindset society expects us to have on the matter. We have to be open to learning & understanding them first to eventually gain acknowledgement

[dash]

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

[AVEN #1 fan]

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

Agender persons usually have those issues and also epicenes does, bc in both cases the external and the internal doesn't match, but i think the external thing should be appearance (with sexual features included) but not the sex if u get me.

[dash]

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

Agender persons usually have those issues and also epicenes does, bc in both cases the external and the internal doesn't match, but i think the external thing should be appearance (with sexual features included) but not the sex if u get me.

I'm not talking about how someone chooses to dress or otherwise express gender. After all, my clothes don't spontaneously change whenever I change context (see something, talk to someone, hear about something, etc.), my hair doesn't change length, and so on. I'm talking about spontaneous shifts in the moment, but "gender fluid" refers to gender as if it's internal rather than external. (The chameleon would be confused by the question "what color do you feel you are inside" -- color is what it's sitting on.) And "agender" means not feeling a gender inside, which is also different.

This also isn't about gender "matching" or not, it's about it being external.

[Anthracite_Impreza]

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

I don't follow this, do you have any other metaphors? :c

[Qwerty321]

I don't understand, how there can be another genders and gender identities that not related to masculinity or femininity or being free of them. It's like say: "My hair colour is my gender" or "my profession is my gender". There are many identities beyond gender identities, why people want to mix them?

Well I don't know necessarily 'how' it happens but it does.

Genders or gender identities are about the words people want to use & that they believe better represents their feelings or better represents their 'gender'. Gender is about feelings and how you view yourself. So I look at it as one's physical sex may have markers but your feelings don't.

That's just my opinion :D

I've always thought gender is a kind of objective mental condition, like being extraverted/introverted, or logical/emotional, etc. One can say, for example "I'm an extraverted person", but there are psychological tests to confirm or disapprove that. As I know there are psychological tests for gender identity, too.

I don't understand, how there can be another genders and gender identities that not related to masculinity or femininity or being free of them. It's like say: "My hair colour is my gender" or "my profession is my gender". There are many identities beyond gender identities, why people want to mix them?

Well I don't know necessarily 'how' it happens but it does.

Genders or gender identities are about the words people want to use & that they believe better represents their feelings or better represents their 'gender'. Gender is about feelings and how you view yourself. So I look at it as one's physical sex may have markers but your feelings don't.

That's just my opinion :D

But still ur gender influence ur sex. Like a Transgender will try to be a transexual and a neutrois will try to be a sexless.

I think, generally speaking, it's not nesessary. Probably, most non-cis people would prefer their bodies to fit their genders, but there can be non-cis people who are absolutely OK with their bodies assigned at birth (I mean they were initially OK with them, not just "ajusted theselves"), but their gender identity is still different from their biological sex.

I don't understand, how there can be another genders and gender identities that not related to masculinity or femininity or being free of them. It's like say: "My hair colour is my gender" or "my profession is my gender". There are many identities beyond gender identities, why people want to mix them?

Well I don't know necessarily 'how' it happens but it does.

Genders or gender identities are about the words people want to use & that they believe better represents their feelings or better represents their 'gender'. Gender is about feelings and how you view yourself. So I look at it as one's physical sex may have markers but your feelings don't.

That's just my opinion :D

But still ur gender influence ur sex. Like a Transgender will try to be a transexual and a neutrois will try to be a sexless.

Not necessarily--dysphoria is not a requirement to be transgender, so it's entirely possible to be trans and have a gender identity that has nothing to do with your body, as far as I know. There are indeed genders with no connection to femininity, masculinity, neutrality, or the absence thereof, so what would people who identify as those "try" to be? I think the reason this is often a point of confusion is that (a) there are many trans people who do experience dysphoria and so people think the two are necessarily inherent parts of each other, and (b) people who have gender identities that have no binary components whatsoever still generally tend to be read as somewhere on the binary at first glance, because it's hard to present/be recognized as something that most people don't realize exists, and so even if that person doesn't have any masculinity, femininity, or neutrality in their identity, they may still try to do things that are associated with unexpected components of those three "main" recognized gendery things in order to shake traditionally gendered expectations in whatever way they can, which can often be mistaken for a sign of dysphoria but in fact doesn't have to be. I don't have the answers for how all this works, but I think limiting the set of "believable" genders to variations on masculinity, femininity, and neutrality is a rather narrow view to take.

Supposing, there are "third gender marker". Why should it be counted as a gender marker, not as a marker of some another identity?

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

Genderless? There are cis-genderless people, as I understand they don't feel their gender and they're cis by defoult, cause they were raised in a cis-society. If they were raised as "the opposite gender" they would probably be "trans-genderless" in sense they would take the opposite gender roles.

[Qwerty321]

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

Agender persons usually have those issues and also epicenes does, bc in both cases the external and the internal doesn't match, but i think the external thing should be appearance (with sexual features included) but not the sex if u get me.

I'm not talking about how someone chooses to dress or otherwise express gender. After all, my clothes don't spontaneously change whenever I change context (see something, talk to someone, hear about something, etc.), my hair doesn't change length, and so on. I'm talking about spontaneous shifts in the moment, but "gender fluid" refers to gender as if it's internal rather than external. (The chameleon would be confused by the question "what color do you feel you are inside" -- color is what it's sitting on.) And "agender" means not feeling a gender inside, which is also different.

This also isn't about gender "matching" or not, it's about it being external.

Seems like flexible genderless people who can take any gender roles. As long as our society is a cis-society, they will take cis-gender roles more often, but depends of their enviroment they can be "trans-genderless" (for example, parents wanted a boy and raised their daughter more like a boy, and she acted that way to please her parents, but when she got a romantic partner, she began to act more feminine to please her romantic partner). Is it the thing?

[Emery.]

Probably, most non-cis people would prefer their bodies to fit their genders

I'll never get it :P (see: my signature) Very wierd criterion of "matching", usefulness for a purpose is much better and far less vague :D

#NerdsVsHumans

[dash]

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

I don't follow this, do you have any other metaphors? :c

I'm trying to say that my gender changes with context. I usually describe it as a die -- only one side is up at any given point, but all are part of me. Usually I am agender, but sometimes one of the clear binary genders is "up." Gender shifts happen due to external, contextual cues (when I am working out, I am binary male, when I am cosplaying, I am binary female, some other things that would take much longer to describe).

I am NOT cis-genderless (as some people have misunderstood me to be saying). I actually have some level of dysphoria pretty much all the time (because of my chest, now that I've stopped my menstrual cycle), and it's sometimes very intense. I plan to have top surgery some day.

I am also absolutely NOT talking about society's "gender roles," whatever that means -- I mean that my gender itself changes with context, not a thing about what I am doing or how I am expressing it.

The term gender-fluid, however, doesn't work for me for several reasons. One, my gender states are discrete, and at no time do I EVER feel "fluid." That is what someone on the "outside" might say to describe what they see, but it is NEVER how I feel. Two, when a certain gender state is "up," is has ALWAYS been my gender -- there is no sense of "yesterday I was male" except in metacognition, wherein I remember intellectually that my gender changes (this took a very long time to figure out, because I do not feel "shifts" at all!). Third, some gender fluid people experience shifts internally without external cues, whereas mine seems to be entirely a product of context (defined broadly).

[Anthracite_Impreza]

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

I don't follow this, do you have any other metaphors? :c

I'm trying to say that my gender changes with context. I usually describe it as a die -- only one side is up at any given point, but all are part of me. Usually I am agender, but sometimes one of the clear binary genders is "up." Gender shifts happen due to external, contextual cues (when I am working out, I am binary male, when I am cosplaying, I am binary female, some other things that would take much longer to describe).

I am NOT cis-genderless (as some people have misunderstood me to be saying). I actually have some level of dysphoria pretty much all the time (because of my chest, now that I've stopped my menstrual cycle), and it's sometimes very intense. I plan to have top surgery some day.

The term gender-fluid, however, doesn't work for me for several reasons. One, my gender states are discrete, and at no time do I EVER feel "fluid." That is what someone on the "outside" might say to describe what they see, but it is NEVER how I feel. Two, when a certain gender state is "up," is has ALWAYS been my gender -- there is no sense of "yesterday I was male" except in metacognition, wherein I remember intellectually that my gender changes (this took a very long time to figure out, because I do not feel "shifts" at all!). Third, some gender fluid people experience shifts internally without external cues, whereas mine seems to be entirely a product of context (defined broadly).

Ah, understood :)

[Qwerty321]

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

I don't follow this, do you have any other metaphors? :c

I'm trying to say that my gender changes with context. I usually describe it as a die -- only one side is up at any given point, but all are part of me. Usually I am agender, but sometimes one of the clear binary genders is "up." Gender shifts happen due to external, contextual cues (when I am working out, I am binary male, when I am cosplaying, I am binary female, some other things that would take much longer to describe).

I am NOT cis-genderless (as some people have misunderstood me to be saying). I actually have some level of dysphoria pretty much all the time (because of my chest, now that I've stopped my menstrual cycle), and it's sometimes very intense. I plan to have top surgery some day.

I am also absolutely NOT talking about society's "gender roles," whatever that means -- I mean that my gender itself changes with context, not a thing about what I am doing or how I am expressing it.

The term gender-fluid, however, doesn't work for me for several reasons. One, my gender states are discrete, and at no time do I EVER feel "fluid." That is what someone on the "outside" might say to describe what they see, but it is NEVER how I feel. Two, when a certain gender state is "up," is has ALWAYS been my gender -- there is no sense of "yesterday I was male" except in metacognition, wherein I remember intellectually that my gender changes (this took a very long time to figure out, because I do not feel "shifts" at all!). Third, some gender fluid people experience shifts internally without external cues, whereas mine seems to be entirely a product of context (defined broadly).

*my gender itself changes with context, not a thing about what I am doing or how I am expressing it.*

Gender shifts are the sigh of being genderfluide, those shifts can work different for different people, as I know they can be sharp or gradual, and there is no reason why they cannot be caused by some external reasons.

But your description of yourself seems more like an agender person who just "plays" gender roles, not live in them. Like an actor who plays, for example, Hamlet, and he lives in that role while playing it, but tomorrow he will play another role. There is a term "crosdresser", but what I mean is a broader concept, like "gender cosplaying" or something, when you "try on" male and female roles.

[dash]

Can we also please have a word for people whose gender is an external thing instead of (or at least as much as) an internal thing? It's like asking a chameleon what color they "feel like" inside. "Gender fluid" doesn't get at this "external" or contextual quality.

I don't follow this, do you have any other metaphors? :c

I'm trying to say that my gender changes with context. I usually describe it as a die -- only one side is up at any given point, but all are part of me. Usually I am agender, but sometimes one of the clear binary genders is "up." Gender shifts happen due to external, contextual cues (when I am working out, I am binary male, when I am cosplaying, I am binary female, some other things that would take much longer to describe).

I am NOT cis-genderless (as some people have misunderstood me to be saying). I actually have some level of dysphoria pretty much all the time (because of my chest, now that I've stopped my menstrual cycle), and it's sometimes very intense. I plan to have top surgery some day.

I am also absolutely NOT talking about society's "gender roles," whatever that means -- I mean that my gender itself changes with context, not a thing about what I am doing or how I am expressing it.

The term gender-fluid, however, doesn't work for me for several reasons. One, my gender states are discrete, and at no time do I EVER feel "fluid." That is what someone on the "outside" might say to describe what they see, but it is NEVER how I feel. Two, when a certain gender state is "up," is has ALWAYS been my gender -- there is no sense of "yesterday I was male" except in metacognition, wherein I remember intellectually that my gender changes (this took a very long time to figure out, because I do not feel "shifts" at all!). Third, some gender fluid people experience shifts internally without external cues, whereas mine seems to be entirely a product of context (defined broadly).

*my gender itself changes with context, not a thing about what I am doing or how I am expressing it.*

Gender shifts are the sigh of being genderfluide, those shifts can work different for different people, as I know they can be sharp or gradual, and there is no reason why they cannot be caused by some external reasons.

But your description of yourself seems more like an agender person who just "plays" gender roles, not live in them. Like an actor who plays, for example, Hamlet, and he lives in that role while playing it, but tomorrow he will play another role. There is a term "crosdresser", but what I mean is a broader concept, like "gender cosplaying" or something, when you "try on" male and female roles.

I'm sorry, no. You are misunderstanding me. I do not "play" any gender roles. My gender changes. These shifts have nothing at all to do with gender "roles." Nor did I ever say I "cross-dress" -- I always dress as the gender that I am. There is no "cross" to "me". That doesn't even make any sense. (I'm wearing a t-shirt and fuzzy pants. What is this "cross" of?)

Please do not compare my actual lived genders to playing a part on stage. This is incorrect, and it hurts. I do not "try on" genders. They happen on their own, in context. It is actually because of gender issues that I have left theater, which I really used to enjoy.

As for my issues with the term "gender fluid," which I have used for myself but which does not entirely work, I have explained the reasons for this above.

[Qwerty321]

Sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. I think, "genderfluide" is a rather broad term that fit for people with different types of gender switches, if it doesn't fit you, maybe, someone could suggest something better.

[dash]

Sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. I think, "genderfluid" is a rather broad term that fit for people with different types of gender switches, if it doesn't fit you, maybe, someone could suggest something better.

I know I don't ever feel "fluid." A die isn't fluid. Or to say it another way, since everyone's going for mirror analogies these days, my gender feels like a broken mirror. Those edges are sharp enough to draw blood.

There isn't "one image," or one thing that changes back and forth. There are discontinuous pieces. Depending on the angle at which I'm standing, I'm a this, or I'm a that, but I've always been that thing.

"Gender discontinuous" doesn't have a ring to it. :)