Being romantic sucks.

[cavyX]

Does anyone else hate that they are romantic? I don't even know what type of romantic I am, Lith, demi, whatever I am, I just find it a constant struggle lately... I hate these feelings, I hate that I like people, it's just so much hassel and hurt for very little reward.

I wish I had an off switch that I could flick that would just numb it down a little.

[scarletlatitude]

Amen my cat sister. Amen. Asexual and romantic (even somewhat gray-romantic like me) is just a pain in the rear.

[Phaetion]

I could not agree more. All the romantic side has ever given me was rejection and, by extension, pain. This is one of the main reasons why I envy aros so much, because they don't have to put up with the problems. However I have heard otherwise.

I remember a post a long time ago that said something along the lines of this: Being a romantic ace is arguably the most painful combination because you know you want a relationship, but being ace significantly diminishes your chances of getting into one, no matter how happy you are being single.

[AVEN #1 fan]

I think ĺoving is great, doesn't matter what u love and how u love unless if you don't have common sense. :)

[Sandshrew]

I have very mixed feelings about this. I hate that I can't control who I like or how I act because of it because its a huge annoyance, but I think the feeling of liking someone kinda makes up for it. However if there was some sort of on and off switch I think I'd leave it off pretty much all the time...

[ace11]

yeah i totally understand. ace and romantic (probably kinda gray romantic but still)....most of the people i'm romantically attracted to are gonna want to have a sexual relationship. i know it can work for many aces, but it definitely doesn't work for me. so it seems like there is no one out there for me at all.

[CatastropheCat]

Being romantic is definitely hard. For me, it doesn't distress me when I don't have crushes, but when I do? Whoo boy. All the feelings bubble up and it's like you can't live your own life. I think that's just part of being romantic, though. The hardest part for me is combining my asexuality with it because most of the people I know/am romantically attracted to are sexual. I'm sex indifferent when it comes to the thought of having sex myself, but I know that would be something a partner would want me to enjoy as well, you know? I just feel like even if I could make them happy by having sex with them, our relationship wouldn't work.

[Guest]

Being romantic has its ups and downs. I like being romantically attracted to my boyfriend, but I don't like some of the consequences like the hurt when I'm upset with him or vice versa. I don't like the longing feeling whenever he leaves, either. But when he's with me and we're happy it's nice...

[Semtex in August]

being romantic and Asexual is HARD

I have someone but I always call her my friend

because she is only here for a month

but I want to spend tons of time with her

but at the same time a small part of me is happy that she is leaving

but I constantly think of romantic gifts and things for her

I held her hand yesterday and felt such joy but I had to let go of her hand right away

I hugged her

and kissed her on the cheek

but that was only as i was saying goodnight and there was no chance of anything else occurring

its like I feel to much and my brain gets overloaded just being around her I hyperventilate a little bit but I don't want it to stop

its kind of like being addicted to WASABI

and you can't stop yourself from consuming large quantities of wasabi

[Reset]

I agree. I don't suffer from it too much, but the idea of probably being alone forever hurts. Theoretically, the perfect ace guy is out there, but the chances of meeting him--and him liking me as well--and things just working out nicely are soooooo unlikely, it's awful. And anyone you actually meet and be okay with staying with forever has that one difference that ruins everything.

Frick.

[timewarp]

I wish I had an off switch that I could flick that would just numb it down a little.

My personal off switch is playing the bass. It takes all my concentration and maybe the best way to describe it is that it makes me notice everything as it is, without "judging" it. All the emotions remain the same and as intense as before, but I'm way more relaxed about them, almost like observing them from a different location. I would even go so far and say that for me overwhelming emotions = lack of concentration, and changing one automatically changes the other.

[TiffanyJung]

being romantic and Asexual is HARD

I have someone but I always call her my friend

because she is only here for a month

but I want to spend tons of time with her

but at the same time a small part of me is happy that she is leaving

but I constantly think of romantic gifts and things for her

I held her hand yesterday and felt such joy but I had to let go of her hand right away

I hugged her

and kissed her on the cheek

but that was only as i was saying goodnight and there was no chance of anything else occurring

its like I feel to much and my brain gets overloaded just being around her I hyperventilate a little bit but I don't want it to stop

its kind of like being addicted to WASABI

and you can't stop yourself from consuming large quantities of wasabi

I love the poem Semtex :)

[Semtex in August]

being romantic and Asexual is HARD

I have someone but I always call her my friend

because she is only here for a month

but I want to spend tons of time with her

but at the same time a small part of me is happy that she is leaving

but I constantly think of romantic gifts and things for her

I held her hand yesterday and felt such joy but I had to let go of her hand right away

I hugged her

and kissed her on the cheek

but that was only as i was saying goodnight and there was no chance of anything else occurring

its like I feel to much and my brain gets overloaded just being around her I hyperventilate a little bit but I don't want it to stop

its kind of like being addicted to WASABI

and you can't stop yourself from consuming large quantities of wasabi

I love the poem Semtex :)

wow. Thank you and thank you for taking me back to that moment. She is in Budapest now, our story concluded. But what a whirlwind time. One must always feel thankful for anytime that we are able to feel profoundly human. And this was indeed one of those times.