So.... this is me.

[Frisk]

Hello everyone!

| 15 | INTJ | asexual | heteroromantic | vegetarian | artist | nerd |

My name is Frisk. Frisk the human. For actually more than a year, I've been watching this community while still wondering about my own sexuality, so why not give it a try? Personally, I have been.... in a hole lately. Everything's changing and I actually have to decide on what I want from life. There are so many questions and things I'm not sure about, so I hope we'll get along and have fun together!

I never truly felt comfortable in my body. Even when I was a little girl, i hated how there were boys and girls in the world and how everyone expected me to behave like a "true" girl. But I thought this was stupid. This point of view's still a big part of my life, as I identify as a female, but actually it's not that much. Also, I hate how people throw stereotypes at me. These pictures they protect on me are not real and a terrible thought. But also, I don't identify as a boy either. On a scale from one to six where one is male and six is female, i would probably be a four, which irritates me a lot. I hope I can find a word to describe that soon.

What bothers me a lot is that I don't know how I can find a reason in me being here, and this is where asexuality takes its part. As an asexual person, i don't really understand what my goal in life should be. My parents always told me they want me to get children, but i'm disgusted of this and told it to them many times..... they still tell me it's just a phase.... well, a phase which went on from kindergarden. But as weird as it sounds, I'm not aromantic. I had crushes before, but for me, it was somehow a lot different than to all my friends as I don't feel attracted to one's looks. People told me that my crushes were indeed attractive, but for me, every human is as attractive as an onion.... well, maybe a potato. How does this feel? Do you just look at somebody and suddenly want to kiss them? Is it like love at first sight? I really wanna know as I never experienced it myself.

I fell in love with people's thoughts. Everyone I liked was extremely creative and liked to share their creations and thoughts with me. I really enjoy this.

And after a while, I start to devellop this kind of feeling I don't know how to call. I want to be next to them all the time, listen to their stories and spend time with them. However, this doesn't mean I want to kiss them or hold hands, (I somehow dislike the thought of holding hands. Like.... why do people do this?) it's definitely not that.

I can tell I really like a person when I want to hug them. I never really did this to any of my friends, so hugging became a big expression of love I only use on people I really really liked. Does my asexuality somehow connect to my disgust of touching people? And why do I actually fall in love if i have absolutely no interest in anything? This question bothered me for a long time. What do I get from a relationship and why do I for some reason seem to want one, even though I know this kind of relationship would maybe not be accepted or be refused by the person I like?

(As you( probably) noticed, I'm not a native english speaking person. I hope this doesn't matter, as I love english and want to use it in my life. )

These are just some of my thoughts. I want to find answers, will you help me?

With hope,

Frisk.

I like chocolates.

[RK800]

Hi Frisk, welcome to AVEN.

First off I'd like to suggest poking around the gender discussion forum. Perhaps that'll help you out because there is certainly more than just male and female, there's androgyne, agender, gender fluid, bigender, etc.

Also there are a few different types of attraction:
Sexual: Pretty self explanatory.

Sensual: Wanting to hug, cuddle, etc.

Romantic: The type which would contribute to crushes.

Platonic: Friendship.

Aesthetic: Being drawn to someone's appearance.

The types of attractions sometimes link up but others not so much. It's entirely possible to experience some and not others.

Also don't feel to down, there are people in the world who feel like you do. It'll work out in the end.

And your English is quite good, no worries. :)

Here's some chocolate.

[Oddball-Meo]

Welcome to AVEN. I hope you like it here and make lots of friends! We have many good people here so don't be scared to post on thread :).

[Guest]

Frisk and Sans on the same topic?

This fills me with determination.

[RK800]

Frisk and Sans on the same topic?

This fills me with determination.

Lot of humans showing up these days.

I don't know what to make of it.

Edit: Undyne joined not to long ago. I'm just waiting for Alphys, Papyrus, Toriel and Asgore now.

It's just a matter of time....

[vsall]

You sound fascinating. :)

thats why i dont like titles, because a title is black and another title is white, and if for some reason we are something in between, it tortures our beautiful mind everyday.

Accept yourself and love every inch of what/who you are.

The best things / people / ideas etc in this life, are unique and different from the "normal" factor.

So even if you are not like the others, who cares...!

Love your self, what you are, and one day, the light that comes from you ( i use the word light because i cant find a better one, but i hope you understand what i mean) will be the reason someone will wanna know you , as a person, as an existance, because what you are, is beautiful, unique.

And you can be an example for a person who has the same struggles. The only thing, is to understand and accept yourself.

You are the answer you seek. In every question you ve made. Its because thats who you are. Simple and beautiful as that.

It takes sometime (depends on the person) to trully find and accept what was there since day 1....(ourself).

But dont be anxious, dont be scared, explore yourself as if you were the freaking Middle Earth :P

explore every part inside you, every thought , every emotion. And accept it, with love.

Doesnt matter what your parents think. Or your friends, or society...

They cant put a title to "normal" . They cant say for sure what is "correct and acceptable".

And here a quote from beloved Morticia Addams..... "Normal is just an illusion. What is normal for the spider, is chaos for the fly".

So as long as it feels right, as long as you dont pretend (because life is tooooo short to pretend, only for the sake of others) live and experience every moment of it.

And dont worry, everything will be allright. Dont seek approvement from others , until the end, the only thing you have is yourself. Good luck ^_^

[WinterWanderer]

Welcome to AVEN!

I'm aaaalmost INTJ. I'm actually INFJ, but I was very close to being INTJ.

I'm glad you like the community here. It is definitely very creative and tight-knit.

[Sapphire Rose]

Hello and welcome to AVEN. I am an INTJ as well. Also, I love Undertale.

[Teeyr]

Frisk and Sans on the same topic?

This fills me with determination.

Lot of humans showing up these days.

I don't know what to make of it.

Edit: Undyne joined not to long ago. I'm just waiting for Alphys, Papyrus, Toriel and Asgore now.

It's just a matter of time....

Have you seen my old friend, Chara, wondering around? I can't find them anywhere...

[pinkroses]

yes i agree.

Hi Frisk, welcome to AVEN.

First off I'd like to suggest poking around the gender discussion forum. Perhaps that'll help you out because there is certainly more than just male and female, there's androgyne, agender, gender fluid, bigender, etc.

Also there are a few different types of attraction:

Sexual: Pretty self explanatory.

Sensual: Wanting to hug, cuddle, etc.

Romantic: The type which would contribute to crushes.

Platonic: Friendship.

Aesthetic: Being drawn to someone's appearance.

The types of attractions sometimes link up but others not so much. It's entirely possible to experience some and not others.

Also don't feel to down, there are people in the world who feel like you do. It'll work out in the end.

And your English is quite good, no worries. :)

Here's some chocolate.

hi where is the gender discussion. i have questions and unsureness.

I have issuses with touch. i have confusion about my gender. which confuses me and frustates me. which what this message here is really about is the touch issues. my brain is all backwards. :( people that dont like to be touched that is okay.

but in my brain i want to and i dont want to.

for example, I am a romantic, yet pda makes me feel comfortable.

more specific example: a guy i used to be into and date, he would hold my hand in public. that's it. he didn't like lick it in public or try to do something werid to it in public, just hold it.

and I could not handle it. I would start to get anxious, my heart would start racing, not in a good way, bad way.

if it was just me and him , him being affectionate, i was fine; but in public i couldn't.

I watch romantic movies. I want that, I want romance. I was able to get it, and then i would get anxiety. -_-

things didn't work out between us. maybe it was my subconcious' way of sending me a message. :/

[Lady Girl]

Hi and welcome to AVEN! Glad you made your way here and I hope you enjoy being part of the community. The members are friendly and supportive, so don't hesitate to join in the conversations! :)

Your English is very good!

[Semtex in August]

Hello Frisk The Human

don't let anyone tell you what you should or should not be

the mighty universe tells me that everything will be really good for you in the future

I am mystical this way

so here is some chocolate

[deltaX]

Hello, and welcome to AVEN!!

I would also recommend checking out the gender discussion forum if you want to explore your gender a bit more. I can't link to it right now because I'm on mobile at the moment, but if you go to the front page of the forum (by pressing the "forums" button at the top of this page) and scroll down, the gender discussion forum will be about halfway down the page.

Anyway, I'm glad you decided to de-lurkify and join the forums! Thanks for taking the time to share your story, and I hope you enjoy being a member here! :)

[RK800]

yes i agree.

hi where is the gender discussion. i have questions and unsureness.

I have issuses with touch. i have confusion about my gender. which confuses me and frustates me. which what this message here is really about is the touch issues. my brain is all backwards. :( people that dont like to be touched that is okay.

but in my brain i want to and i dont want to.

for example, I am a romantic, yet pda makes me feel comfortable.

more specific example: a guy i used to be into and date, he would hold my hand in public. that's it. he didn't like lick it in public or try to do something werid to it in public, just hold it.

and I could not handle it. I would start to get anxious, my heart would start racing, not in a good way, bad way.

if it was just me and him , him being affectionate, i was fine; but in public i couldn't.

I watch romantic movies. I want that, I want romance. I was able to get it, and then i would get anxiety. -_-

things didn't work out between us. maybe it was my subconcious' way of sending me a message. :/

Hi pinkroses, gender discussion is here: http://www.asexuality.org/en/forum/57-gender-discussion/

It is not uncommon for some people to have anxiety related to sensual behavior especially in a public setting. I'm sure you'll notice many here feel similar.

Frisk and Sans on the same topic?

This fills me with determination.

Lot of humans showing up these days.

I don't know what to make of it.

Edit: Undyne joined not to long ago. I'm just waiting for Alphys, Papyrus, Toriel and Asgore now.

It's just a matter of time....

Have you seen my old friend, Chara, wondering around? I can't find them anywhere...

Bad times pal, bad times.

[lina-gray]

hi Frisk and welcome!

your english are good! thanks for introducing yourself and i m happy to have you here!

[marauders]

Welcome to AVEN, Frisk! Your English is very good! I hope that you have a great time here, and that you find the forums welcoming. :)

[kelico]

Welcome to AVEN! Gosh, I read your whole post and totally couldn't tell English isn't your native language! Your English is great! : ) Thank you so much for introducing yourself and joining this community. You've already gotten some really great advice and suggestions. The Gender Discussions forum is fantastic, and basically, everyone here is supportive and helpful. Take your time exploring, ask questions if you have any, and I hope you enjoy being a member!