is this asexual too?

[Hail]

I was definitely a sexual person a couple of years ago,

but one day I suddenly started feeling disgust at the feeling without any traumatic triggers.

I was pretty sure asexual people just didn't feel any sexual feelings but further research has made me confused.

now, saying "I'm not asexual." feels like denial.

but saying "I'm asexual" feels like lying.

can it not be defined 'asexual' because I feel sexual feelings?

or should it be considered 'asexual' because I find no pleasure in that feelings?

right now, I find sexual things boring and time consuming..

am I asexual, antisexual, or just sexual with low libido?

borderline asexual?

what even is asexuality exactly?

[ThaHoward]

So you have sexual feelings, but you don't like having them? If that's the case, that doesn't male you asexual. Perhaps anti-sexual, sex repulsed etc. If you don't experience sexual attraction and/or sexual desire, then you're asexual. If not, then I would say you're "sexual" who just don't like having these feelings.

[Rising Sun]

Asexuality is an absence, not repulsion. There are many sexual persons who feel repulsed by sex. It's just that it's taboo because it's considered so old-fashioned.

[Jea]

can it not be defined 'asexual' because I feel sexual feelings?

What do you mean by 'sexual feelings'? I think the answer lies in there :)

what even is asexuality exactly?

There are two main definitions:

An asexual person is a person who doesn't feel sexual attraction.

An asexual person is a person who doesn feel a desire for partnered sex.

Or both, whatever.

Anyway, if you manage to define your feelings, perhaps you will be able to find out if you are asexual or not, because you're the best one to know. Consider gray-asexuality too perhaps :) And don't hesitate to ask more questions :)

[Guest]

What a_fox said. :)

There's a possibility that you are sexual, but sex-repulsed. It's an uncommon combination, and it's bound to be one of the most frustrating and depressing positions to be in, but it does exist. (I've been through that, myself - just not with sex, but with romance. Hearing the term "romance-repulsed romantic" on here for the first time was a big eye-opener for me.)

[Archon]

If you feel sexual attraction to people but don't want to act on those feelings, you might be lithsexual, which falls under the gray-asexual umbrella. That's just one possibility, of course only you can say for sure.

[Merperson]

That sounds more like sex repulsion to me, tbh

[Frigid Pink]

I define "asexuality" as "no inherent desire for partnered sex." Basically, an "asexual" person isn't drawn towards sexual interaction with others. Beyond that, it varies from person to person, regardless of sexual orientation. If you want to learn more about asexuality, then I highly recommend this (scholarly) article.

[Hail]

clarifying;

1.I've never had actual sex, nor feel any desire to do it.

2.here I'm saying sexual feelings as the sensation of blood pooling in sexual organs.

so that's physical arousal?

minus desire.

3.when I say disgust, I mean mild unpleasantness. not out right hate.

also, thinking maybe this has to do with my new found agenderness?

taking that in to account, does your views change, or is it the same?

[Hail]

Asexuality is an absence, not repulsion. There are many sexual persons who feel repulsed by sex. It's just that it's taboo because it's considered so old-fashioned.

not exactly repulsion..

more like, arousal is uncomfortable and unpleasant.

no desires whatsoever.

can asexual people become physically aroused too?

like blood in genitals arousal.

[Xavy]

My view is that you can use whatever label you think is most appropriate for you, nobody else gets to decide tagged for you. Now, having said that, I have to agree with some of the comments above, I think you are mainly sex repulsed, which doesn't necessarily mean tang you are not also asexual, but, I see more sex repulsion in your story.

[Autumn Season]

clarifying;

1.I've never had actual sex, nor feel any desire to do it.

2.here I'm saying sexual feelings as the sensation of blood pooling in sexual organs.

so that's physical arousal?

minus desire.

Asexuality is an absence, not repulsion. There are many sexual persons who feel repulsed by sex. It's just that it's taboo because it's considered so old-fashioned.

not exactly repulsion..

more like, arousal is uncomfortable and unpleasant.

no desires whatsoever.

can asexual people become physically aroused too?

like blood in genitals arousal.

In this case you can indeed be asexual. As the others already mentioned, asexuals don't experience any desire to engage in sexual activities with other people. You seem to fit this description.

Asexuals can become aroused, have a libido, masturbate, feel romantically, want to be sensual with a partner (cuddle, ...), ... They just don't want partnered sex for their own sake.

So when you say you're "sexual", it sounds like you mean that you have a libido as well as the ability to become aroused. Those don't actually make you "sexual" as opposed to "asexual". It just has got nothing to do with it.

I'm sorry to hear that arousal gives you discomfort. If it wasn't like this before and you see it as a big problem, then you might want to talk to your doctor about it.

[Frigid Pink]

clarifying;

1.I've never had actual sex, nor feel any desire to do it.

2.here I'm saying sexual feelings as the sensation of blood pooling in sexual organs.

so that's physical arousal?

minus desire.

3.when I say disgust, I mean mild unpleasantness. not out right hate.

also, thinking maybe this has to do with my new found agenderness?

taking that in to account, does your views change, or is it the same?

If you want to learn more about asexuality, then I highly recommend this (scholarly) article.

(see excerpts below)

"the definition of asexuality as a lack of sexual attraction (or lack of sexual desire for others) does not necessarily imply that asexual people lack physiological arousal experiences. The capacity for erection and vaginal lubrication in asexual people may be fully intact"

"there are a number of definitions of asexuality, although a lack of sexual attraction (or a lack of desire for others) is, arguably, the most common definition in both recent literature and among individuals who support the most popular chat/Web site (AVEN) devoted to asexuality issues. Also notable is that a lack of attraction is, at least to some degree, independent of other facets of pyschosexual functioning (e.g., sexual desire, sexual behavior, pysiological arousal, romantic inclinations)."

"More research needs to be conducted on the complex relationship between attraction and desire, but recent evidence and theory sugest the lack of desire in asexuals may be primarily a lack of desire for others - not a lack of desire per se; thus again, a lack of sexual attraction/desire for others may be a defining characteristic of asexuality. In short, when there is evidence of a form of desire in asexual people, it is often a "solitary" desire - a desire that is unconnected to others or a nonpartnered desire. For example, there is evidence that a significant number of asexual people masturbate, and thus asexual people may not lack all forms of sexual desire."

[Hail]

That's quite enlightening.

"the definition of asexuality as a lack of sexual attraction (or lack of sexual desire for others) does not necessarily imply that asexual people lack physiological arousal experiences. The capacity for erection and vaginal lubrication in asexual people may be fully intact"

"Thus, genital arousal patterns are important and informative in understanding sexuality, particularly for men, but these patterns should not necessarily trump subjective attraction in determining sexual orientation."

ReClarification:

1. I have capacity for erection that can be triggered through applying pressure on genital.

2. I can feel the erection but it is not in anyways pleasant or desirable. it is rather unpleasant in a way that nausea is unpleasant.

so that's..physically unpleasant?

The article presents the definition of Asexuality as

1. lack of desire for sexual stimulus.

2. lack of sexual attraction towards others, but not necessarily lack of desire for sexual stimulus.

3. people who self identify as asexual.

I don't really get why self identification is legitimate.

there's a set for a term made of many different sets of definitions.

if my set of definitions is a sub set of the set for the term asexual, then I'm asexual. if it's not, then I'm not asexual.

but it's probably different. I'll save that for later discussion.

so, erasing def3, I think I'm defined as def1.

but there are people telling me I'm asexual, then there's people telling me I'm sex-repulsed.

I'm not sure what sex repulsed is, and how it's different from asexual.

is sex repulsed is due to psychological animosity against the idea of sex? like how some traditional religious people think of it as taboo?

[Hail]

clarifying;

1.I've never had actual sex, nor feel any desire to do it.

2.here I'm saying sexual feelings as the sensation of blood pooling in sexual organs.

so that's physical arousal?

minus desire.

Asexuality is an absence, not repulsion. There are many sexual persons who feel repulsed by sex. It's just that it's taboo because it's considered so old-fashioned.

not exactly repulsion..

more like, arousal is uncomfortable and unpleasant.

no desires whatsoever.

can asexual people become physically aroused too?

like blood in genitals arousal.

In this case you can indeed be asexual. As the others already mentioned, asexuals don't experience any desire to engage in sexual activities with other people. You seem to fit this description.

Asexuals can become aroused, have a libido, masturbate, feel romantically, want to be sensual with a partner (cuddle, ...), ... They just don't want partnered sex for their own sake.

So when you say you're "sexual", it sounds like you mean that you have a libido as well as the ability to become aroused. Those don't actually make you "sexual" as opposed to "asexual". It just has got nothing to do with it.

I'm sorry to hear that arousal gives you discomfort. If it wasn't like this before and you see it as a big problem, then you might want to talk to your doctor about it.

nope, no problem. :-) . unless it affects romantic relationships, but that's for waaay later.

[Hail]

My view is that you can use whatever label you think is most appropriate for you, nobody else gets to decide tagged for you. Now, having said that, I have to agree with some of the comments above, I think you are mainly sex repulsed, which doesn't necessarily mean tang you are not also asexual, but, I see more sex repulsion in your story.

as posted above, I don't do self labeling. it doesn't make sense to me.

also, I want to know what sex repulsion is, and how it's different from asexuality.

[Rising Sun]

Sex-repulsion is simply feeling disgusted by sex (slightly or a lot, it doesn't matter). While asexuality is usually considered innate, sex-repulsion is certainly acquired. It might be positively correlated to asexuality, but beyond that, there is no link between both ; there are sexual persons who are sex-repulsed and sex-favorable asexuals.

[Autumn Season]

The article presents the definition of Asexuality as

1. lack of desire for sexual stimulus.

2. lack of sexual attraction towards others, but not necessarily lack of desire for sexual stimulus.

3. people who self identify as asexual.

Lack of desire for PARTNERED sexual stimulus to be exact.

but there are people telling me I'm asexual, then there's people telling me I'm sex-repulsed.

I'm not sure what sex repulsed is, and how it's different from asexual.

is sex repulsed is due to psychological animosity against the idea of sex? like how some traditional religious people think of it as taboo?

When I read your first post, I also thought you were "only" sex repulsed and not asexual. This is because you said:

I was definitely a sexual person a couple of years ago,

but one day I suddenly started feeling disgust at the feeling without any traumatic triggers.

[...]

can it not be defined 'asexual' because I feel sexual feelings?

or should it be considered 'asexual' because I find no pleasure in that feelings?

When the members on AVEN say things like "sexual person" and "sexual feeling", they usually mean "somebody who desires partnered sex" and "a desire for partnered sex".

However you later clarified that by "sexual feelings" you mean "arousal" and that you don't have any desire to engage in partnered sex. So I commented that you sound like an asexual person.

You might find this thread about sex repulsion interesting or one of these three articles.

repulsed asexual — these asexuals feel a strong aversion to the idea of participating in sex. It should be noted that their repulsion often has nothing to do with sexuality in general or, more specifically, with other people engaging in sex. Their repulsion is only in reference to themselves engaging in sex. A repulsed asexual’s reaction to sex (that they participate in or are asked to participate in) may range anywhere from mild discomfort to panic to revulsion. Some asexuals may be sex-repulsed to a point where they cannot watch pornography or think about sex in the abstract without feeling emotionally and/or physically distressed.

Sex-repulsed: Repulsed by sex. Makes you sick, disturbed, uncomfortable, etc. A whole slew of negative feelings.

Sex-averse: Generally a lesser degree of sex repulsion - or, someone who isn’t necessarily repulsed by sex, but would rather not see/hear/talk about it. They tend to avoid sexual things because they make them uncomfortable or displeased.

[SkyWorld]

is sex repulsed is due to psychological animosity against the idea of sex? like how some traditional religious people think of it as taboo?

Everyone did a great job explaining what sex-repulsion is before I had a chance to get to it. :D Though, I'll answer this part of your question.

sex-repulsed =/= sex-negative

[Hail]

Oh, so to recheck the feeling of sex repulsion I did another 'experiment on body'. (last experiment; last week of September)

I was startled to find that I could not get a physiological arousal. :O

this is a first and it's rather disturbing.. because it sounds like 'inability'.

does this have to do with the more hormonal concepts (dopamine ect.) (in which case I don't mind that much)

or is it a physical health problem? does it affect other aspects of my health? because I've been suffering from insomnia lately..

hell, what is happening? I don't exactly have a doctor to ask this. I'm curious of the science behind this.

[Rising Sun]

If you try sexual activity not because you really want it but because you're forcing yourself, sure, it won't work. It's exactly like trying to date to check if you can fall in love. It simply doesn't work that way. On the contrary, you can develop a mental block with that because it creates more and more repulsion.

[Hail]

huh. ah, well. might as well leave it at that then.

is this going to be problematic?