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Constant Self-Doubt?


Hiltibrant

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Hello lovely people of AVEN!

I started identifying as a Gray-A a few days ago (still in the questioning phase, I suppose), and for a while it felt like it fit so well, but now I'm really starting to freak myself out. Instead of living my life normally, I've become a little obsessed over seeing if I'm really what I think I am. I spent today thinking almost constantly about whether or not I felt sexually attracted to anyone, and then kind of panicking so I can't tell what I'm feeling. To make matters worse, I do have a libido, so it's easy for me to confuse myself about what I'm feeling, and getting aroused when I otherwise wouldn't have. It's been a super stressful day for me, and I really feel like it shouldn't have been. Just yesterday I felt so good about finding this community, but now I have doubts that maybe I'm just fooling myself into thinking I'm gray asexual :(

Any advice for keeping cool? Or do I just need to ride out the initial confusion and see where it leads?

Thanks a bunch!

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residentmusician

It's easy to be confused in the beginning! At least it was for me haha. When you learn all these new things about asexuality, it can be difficult to sort through everything and make sense of it. For me, it just took time to live with the labels and think about them. They make you put everything in a new light. So just take some time to think about it. Maybe the things you learn through this community will make sense of your experiences. Read around the forums and talk to people. You'll likely find someone who shares similar feelings and experiences as you.

Best of luck! PM me if you ever wanna talk about asexuality experiences or just mundane things :)

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Hello, first I'm sorry the day was stressful for you. That's never fun :(

Second, I've been having the same problem a lot recently. I'm ace and have a medium-to-high libido and have been wondering the same thing you have. So I can't really help you, I'm afraid, but I want you to know you're not alone. If you don't ever figure it out, then we can be confused together.

Good luck!

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I suppose it is just me trying to work out how these new labels apply to my life, I'll try to calm down and just think about things instead of panicking all day. This community has already helped me get some of my thoughts together, and I'm sure sticking around longer will help even more, even if I never figure everything out.

katspark, you don't need to have an answer for our problem, knowing I'm not alone is more than enough to make me feel better ^_^

Thank you both for the reassurance!

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