Never had it and couldn't imagine it

[somethingrandom]

So basically I've never had sex and I don't know but it bothers me and doesn't bother me. I keep thinking that one day I will and it will be with someone I love but at the same time I don't think I would ever want to do that because I'm not dying to try it or anything, like I can quite happily spend my day without it and feel fine. I just don't get why everyone bangs on about it all the time (all my friends have done it I think).

I've just done my first year at uni and never once even touched a guy but a lot of my friends that also moved away to uni have kissed plenty of guys and had one night stands. I just think, how could you ever do that? I think that I could only imagine doing it with someone I can completely trust and have been with for a long time, but at the same time I don't think I would ever want someone to get that close to me.

It's strange, sometimes I think I want to experience sex and then a lot of the time I don't. But I'm worried that I am asexual and the only reason I want to experience sex sometimes when I think about my situation, is because everyone else has. I think that if all my friends haven't had sex then I wouldn't be thinking of wanting to do it ever.

I just feel so confused, am I asexual? Do I ever want sex? It's like, I don't want to die never having had experienced it but at the same time I have no interest in doing it. Any thoughts or advice would be nice or if anyone is in a similar situation???

Thank you from a confused person!

[Bristol]

There are lots of things in your post that I can relate to personally - particularly the bit about

I just don't get why everyone bangs on about it all the time

You might well be asexual - if this were a game where we had to guess and you already knew, I'd say you are. But the way it works is, only you can decide that. And you're allowed to change your decision later on if you want to.

At one AVEN meet I went to, an asexual who had experienced sex told me she found it about as interesting as going to the toilet. If you are asexual, you're probably not really missing anything. If not - even for sexual people the first time can be a disappointment. If you're worried that you're missing out on a life-changing experience that will be the best thing ever: I don't think you are.