What am I?

[TheGentleHerbivore]

I'm seriously confused about my sexual and romantic orientations, can someone help me?

Romantically, I have never felt romantic attraction until I got to know someone really well, I've only ever had one crush, maybe two?

I don't think a person's genitalia or gender identity would matter to me.

And I find it very hard to desipher between what is and what isn't romantic feelings. Very hard.

Sexually, I don't think I have ever felt sexual attraction, when I like someone I rarely if ever think about having sex with them.

But I'd be willing to do it, if they wanted to. But I don't care, I could die a virgin and that wouldn't really bother me.

It's like cake, I could never have cake again and it would rarely cross my mind, or I could have cake every day and that'd be cool too.

Sometimes I do feel like cake, but it's far from necissary and I could easily and just as happily live without it.

And I've never looked at someone and thought "Mm, I would love to go get a slice of cake with that person."

Bad analogy but it's all I could think of.

I have a boyfriend at the moment and I've known him for years. I didn't begin to like him until we started hanging out a lot. And I'm still kind of confused about my feelings for him. I know I like him as more than a friend, but it's like ever-so-slightly. But at the same time I know I really love him, and never felt this way for just a friend, which is confusing to me. Cause it's such a slightly different feeling yet at the same very different. I don't know if this makes sense, I'm even confusing myself.

I think I have some sexual attraction to him now after knowing and dating him for so long, we're really close, I kind of maybe want to but at the same time I really don't care and it's not like necissary. And I wouldn't be at all bummed out if it never happened.

What am I? I'm so confused. I've been confused for years.

[Star Bit]

Demiromantic: needing a specific bond to feel romantic attraction.

Quoiromantic: unable to tell the difference between romantic and platonic emotions.

All of those are under the Gray-romantic umbrella so that could also be used. But Quoi can be helped with better information. Romantic attraction is an emotion so it's hard to put into words but it can be inadequately put as soft/fuzzy feelings with some degree of fixation (at least in comparison to how one normally is with other people). Some people react to it with butterflies in their stomach, dreamy mind set, increased heart rate, etc., and others don't.

People can also mistake one attraction for another when they don't know what they are. There are 6 types of attraction. They can be felt separately and in different combinations. They're all typically felt with romantic attraction but aren't needed. Other than romantic attraction, obviously, they can all be felt platonically. You already know the first two.

• Aesthetic attraction is the pull to look at someone because of their looks and or mannerisms. It's different from recognizing good looks/what is aesthetically pleasing.
• Emotional attraction is the fixation on someone because of their emotions (their optimism, stoicness, etc.), and by extent personality. I would compare it to having a favorite character or admirance.
• Sensual attraction is the urge to have non-sexual physical contact. Platonically displaying this above the norm qualifies as a type of queerplatonic relationship (QPR). I would compare it to how many people have the urge to act toward their pets. Though this term is typically applied to other humans.
• Platonic attraction (aka a squish; a play on the romantic word crush) is the strond urge to know or befriend someone.
• And it's possible to find someone charming without romantic attraction. (look up charming's definition for further clarification)
• It's also possible to have queerplatonic feelings for someone; to emotionally feel platonic but have the characteristic(s) associated with a romantic/sexual relationship. It can be an importance/closeness stronger than the best friend norm, displaying platonic sensual attraction above the norm (only differing from romantic sensual attraction with chaste kissing, although preferring chaste kissing or no kissing does not make one’s feelings unromantic), friends with sexual benefits, romantically pleasing someone they platonically love (QP to one and romantic to the other, although it's their decision on what they call the relationship), or any combination of those. They may or may not have monogamy, live together, have kids, or look like a couple to the public. Romantics and Aromantics can have QPRs.

There are two things; the desire and the urge to have that relationship/act on the desire. It's possible to have sexual attraction (the impulse/urge/compulsion to have sex with someone specific) with an indifferent sex-drive.

[CMV]

Demiromantic: needing a specific bond to feel romantic attraction.

Quoiromantic: unable to tell the difference between romantic and platonic emotions.

All of those are under the Gray-romantic umbrella so that could also be used. But Quoi can be helped with better information. Romantic attraction is an emotion so it's hard to put into words but it can be inadequately put as soft/fuzzy feelings with some degree of fixation. Some people react to it with butterflies in their stomach, dreamy mind set, increased heart rate, etc., and others don't.

People can also mistake one attraction for another when they don't know what they are. There are 6 types of attraction. They can be felt separately and in different combinations. They're all typically felt with romantic attraction but aren't needed. Other than romantic attraction, obviously, they can all be felt platonically. You already know the first two.

• Aesthetic attraction is the pull to look at someone because of their looks and or mannerisms. It's different from recognizing good looks/what is aesthetically pleasing.
• Emotional attraction is the fixation on someone because of their emotions (their optimism, stoicness, etc.), and by extent personality. I would compare it to having a favorite character or admirance.
• Sensual attraction is the urge to have non-sexual physical contact. Platonically displaying this above the norm qualifies as a queerplatonic relationship. I would compare it to how many people have the urge to act toward their pets. Though this term is typically applied to other humans.
• Platonic attraction (aka squish; a play on the romantic word crush) is the strond urge to know or befriend someone.
• And it's possible to find someone charming without romantic attraction. (look up charming's definition for further clarification)
• It's also possible to have queerplatonic feelings for someone; to emotionally feel platonic but have the characteristic(s) associated with a romantic/sexual relationship. It can be an importance/closeness stronger than the best friend norm, displaying platonic sensual attraction above the norm (only differing from romantic sensual attraction with chaste kissing, although preferring chaste kissing or no kissing does not make one’s feelings unromantic), friends with sexual benefits, romantically pleasing someone they platonically love (QP to one and romantic to the other, although it's their decision on what they call the relationship), or any combination of those. They may or may not have monogamy, live together, have kids, or look like a couple to the public. Romantics and Aromantics can have QPRs.[/size]

There are two things; the desire and the urge to have that relationship/act on the desire. It's possible to have sexual attraction (the impulse/urge/compulsion to have sex with someone specific) with an indifferent sex-drive.

Really awesome and detailed way to describe it!

[TheGentleHerbivore]

Demiromantic: needing a specific bond to feel romantic attraction.

Quoiromantic: unable to tell the difference between romantic and platonic emotions.

All of those are under the Gray-romantic umbrella so that could also be used. But Quoi can be helped with better information. Romantic attraction is an emotion so it's hard to put into words but it can be inadequately put as soft/fuzzy feelings with some degree of fixation (at least in comparison to how one normally is with other people). Some people react to it with butterflies in their stomach, dreamy mind set, increased heart rate, etc., and others don't.

People can also mistake one attraction for another when they don't know what they are. There are 6 types of attraction. They can be felt separately and in different combinations. They're all typically felt with romantic attraction but aren't needed. Other than romantic attraction, obviously, they can all be felt platonically. You already know the first two.

• Aesthetic attraction is the pull to look at someone because of their looks and or mannerisms. It's different from recognizing good looks/what is aesthetically pleasing.
• Emotional attraction is the fixation on someone because of their emotions (their optimism, stoicness, etc.), and by extent personality. I would compare it to having a favorite character or admirance.
• Sensual attraction is the urge to have non-sexual physical contact. Platonically displaying this above the norm qualifies as a type of queerplatonic relationship (QPR). I would compare it to how many people have the urge to act toward their pets. Though this term is typically applied to other humans.
• Platonic attraction (aka a squish; a play on the romantic word crush) is the strond urge to know or befriend someone.
• And it's possible to find someone charming without romantic attraction. (look up charming's definition for further clarification)
• It's also possible to have queerplatonic feelings for someone; to emotionally feel platonic but have the characteristic(s) associated with a romantic/sexual relationship. It can be an importance/closeness stronger than the best friend norm, displaying platonic sensual attraction above the norm (only differing from romantic sensual attraction with chaste kissing, although preferring chaste kissing or no kissing does not make one’s feelings unromantic), friends with sexual benefits, romantically pleasing someone they platonically love (QP to one and romantic to the other, although it's their decision on what they call the relationship), or any combination of those. They may or may not have monogamy, live together, have kids, or look like a couple to the public. Romantics and Aromantics can have QPRs.

There are two things; the desire and the urge to have that relationship/act on the desire. It's possible to have sexual attraction (the impulse/urge/compulsion to have sex with someone specific) with an indifferent sex-drive.

Thank you this helps a lot.