Anyina Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 I hope this is the right place for this thread. Okay, I really don't feel that comfortable talking about this, but I kind of need to vent right now so... Just deal with me. I'm ace, in my midtwenties and have a low(-ish) sex drive. In my case, my sex drive seems to be very much linked to my hormonal cycle, since I usually only get this kind of feeling around the same period every cycle. I'll be honest here: I find it so utterly annoying. I will get aroused pretty much out of nowhere and/or feel the need to trigger that reaction. By this point in my life I usually just go right ahead and masturbate so I can be done with it and keep on with my life, but I sort of lean towards sex-averse so I find the situation to be disgusting, distressing and very much annoying (as I said), both before, during and after the act itself. Also most of the times I feel really uneasy in the aftermath, like my body will be relaxed but I feel emotionally and psychologically disgusted and inadequate in my own skin; no need to say it's a somewhat confusing and distressing situation for me. Sometimes I think I wish there was a way for me to get rid of this annoyance, like some kind of pill/hormon I could take that would make it go away without any kind of consequence or side effects for my health. But at the same time, I'm a person who believes in accepting oneself and being happy with the way you are, so this creates a conflict in my mind and makes me feel really guilty for thinking that way. I just hope I will learn how to deal with this better in the future. Not that I am expecting any kind of advice, I'm just venting, but if you did have any advice or experience to offer, it will be well appreciated. And I'm done now =) Sometimes writing my thoughts does me good. Link to post Share on other sites
knout Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 I think a lot of people experience a sense of disgust after taking care of business. I find that the best way to not feel this way is to make it part of a routine, just like you have other things you have to do, if you know at that time you have to do that... It can also help, if you feel your body gets gross and all, to do it before showering so you can feel "clean" after and you also got ride of the itch. I don't know about the pill, I've heard that it can change your sex-drive but I don't know... I don't know if you'd want to handle it this way either, that'd be up to you :) Libido also fluctuates randomly and quite unpredictably sometimes... And yes, I agree with you... the best would be to accept it fully, like it's a part of ourselves and that we, as human beings, can never be disgusting for our feelings or bodily functions.... but honestly I never managed that, I didn't give up hope yet. Well, I'm not really helping but you're not alone in this at least :) Link to post Share on other sites
Unlabeled Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 I hope this is the right place for this thread. Okay, I really don't feel that comfortable talking about this, but I kind of need to vent right now so... Just deal with me. I'm ace, in my midtwenties and have a low(-ish) sex drive. In my case, my sex drive seems to be very much linked to my hormonal cycle, since I usually only get this kind of feeling around the same period every cycle. I'll be honest here: I find it so utterly annoying. I will get aroused pretty much out of nowhere and/or feel the need to trigger that reaction. By this point in my life I usually just go right ahead and masturbate so I can be done with it and keep on with my life, but I sort of lean towards sex-averse so I find the situation to be disgusting, distressing and very much annoying (as I said), both before, during and after the act itself. Also most of the times I feel really uneasy in the aftermath, like my body will be relaxed but I feel emotionally and psychologically disgusted and inadequate in my own skin; no need to say it's a somewhat confusing and distressing situation for me. Sometimes I think I wish there was a way for me to get rid of this annoyance, like some kind of pill/hormon I could take that would make it go away without any kind of consequence or side effects for my health. But at the same time, I'm a person who believes in accepting oneself and being happy with the way you are, so this creates a conflict in my mind and makes me feel really guilty for thinking that way. I just hope I will learn how to deal with this better in the future. Not that I am expecting any kind of advice, I'm just venting, but if you did have any advice or experience to offer, it will be well appreciated. And I'm done now =) Sometimes writing my thoughts does me good. I've read that when transsexuals transition, the hormonal treatments can alter their sexual orientation. Trans-women like the doctor in think it's Colorado who does GRS herself (and has a great info site) reported that once 'he' began the estrogen therapy, he found himself attracted to men where he hadn't before. So I'd imagine our hormones levels are in fact responsible for our interests, or lack of interests in sex. If your hormones when in flux during your menstrual cycle causes you discomfort, some kind of hormone blocker regime might be something you could look into. Not sure what risks might be inherent with no hormone levels whatsoever, but if it's upsetting enough, might be something to ask your ob/gyn about. Some kind of hormone suppression treatment that'd mimic menopause diminshing sexual desire like. Link to post Share on other sites
demiandproud Posted July 30, 2015 Share Posted July 30, 2015 Can't offer you any advice, unfortunately, but I did want to say I sympathise with the bind you're in and wish you good luck with finding a solution that fits you and hopefully an open-minded medical professional that can give you some good advice. Link to post Share on other sites
Misaki Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 This happens to me too, and I get really annoyed, even start feeling sad and disgusted. I think it's gross . So I just let it be until it goes away or try to focus in some other activities in the meantime. It does not affect me in a major way though. But I wouldn't take medicines to cure that, since I'm totally capable of controlling it. Link to post Share on other sites
Anyina Posted July 31, 2015 Author Share Posted July 31, 2015 Yeah... I don't really want to take any medicine to "fix" it either. It's more like kind of a wishfull thought that would go away on its own ^^' I still need to figure this out and learn how to deal with it in a healthier way. Anyways. Thanks for the kind words, guys =) Link to post Share on other sites
andreas1033 Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 If i was op, learn to channel it into other things. Link to post Share on other sites
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