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Friend of the Piper...


damnitsham

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Now I've been mates with Lonepiper for eons, but I must say that I've been really lucky to see a facet of him that has been confided only to me. Can't say I'm the first one to say that in this topic, but hey I'm a newb so give me your piece.

In fact I may have a tale you'd like to hear from someone of the most heterosexual (yeah never thought you'd hear that did ya?!) nature...

I have been, and always will be, a ladies man. There is no argument in my mind, I think of the girls, and I am enitced by the girls, and 'everything else' by the girls. Don't take me for a questioning or even curious type, I've had a go at the other side of the spectrum, and frankly it's just not right so very much. Nope, won't see me going the guys any time soon (hey, at least I tried...).

No, my problem is a lack of satisfaction. Not that I don't enjoy the company of females or their efforts; much like you would enjoy a spa or a back rub. But I'm just not satisfied. The end result is myself spending hours attending to their whims without any recompense, regardless of their efforts. It may seem like a pointless affair to those of your nature, but I have resorted to taking pleasure in the enjoyment of others, much like a perverted form of nurse. Although I haven't been without satisfaction; there was one girl who actually managed it, but she had to put in a hell of a lot of effort. I guess it was worth what she had to do, but I have to lay the question down: Am I going to be forced to wait for every 20th woman before I find physical gratification? And is it worth all that effort to recieve the gratification?

Not to mention the others who failed. It's strange how much girls take pride in their sexual dominance... And it was hard to see them get so demoralised just because they had to please me, but they couldn't. In fact, you could say that they had the same objective I have, to make others happy, with no concern for your own enjoyment.

I guess what makes it different is that I am SUPPOSED to enjoy and be pleased; I am MAN and the WOMAN must make me happy. She is WOMAN and must please the MAN. It may seem like a shallow P.O.V, but biologically that's meant to be the score (guess it's no good preaching that to you good folk hey?). So for some reason (maybe the one above?) I find myself constantly enamoured by women until a point that they find themselves sexually useless and get insecure, even though I'm more concerned with the person I'm talking to, not fucking.

Am I seriously being hindered by my peculiarity? I've no problem with female friends, it's just when things become physical that I end up with 'girl with complex'...

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Based on your previous post and the information therein, I'd guess that you are, quite simply, oversexed. You've overdone it, and now the gratification has become less and less. Eventually, gone entirely. It seems strange you would post this on the Asexuality forums, but there are many understanding people here, so I'd bet you'll get advice. All I have to offer is, if you enjoy speaking with them, then speak with them. Try to back off the sex for a while, and eventually, things might return to normal.

I've heard of this happening with other people, too. Eventually, the pleasure is gone if it's done too much. You need more and more, eventually too much.

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I guess what makes it different is that I am SUPPOSED to enjoy and be pleased; I am MAN and the WOMAN must make me happy. She is WOMAN and must please the MAN. It may seem like a shallow P.O.V, but biologically that's meant to be the score (guess it's no good preaching that to you good folk hey?)

Biologically? i honestly dont get it, u must be jokin..

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I guess what makes it different is that I am SUPPOSED to enjoy and be pleased; I am MAN and the WOMAN must make me happy. She is WOMAN and must please the MAN. It may seem like a shallow P.O.V, but biologically that's meant to be the score (guess it's no good preaching that to you good folk hey?)

Biologically? i honestly dont get it, u must be jokin..

I don't think he is. The P.O.V. comment is a bit of a "warning, unwise attitude next" kind of thing. Whether it's been instilled by nature or nurture, the fact is it's been that way for a long time (*) and you can expect that kind of attitude to persist a bit.

(*) = What I'm reffering to is the male dominance seen throughout history. I'm not a historian, psychologist or sociologist, but it seems clear that the notion that women are somehow intended to please the men they are with is an assumption derived from the fact that men have risen to the top of society and women are in some respect inferior.

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Silly Green Monkey

Weird, all the stories I've read indicate that males achieve pleasure quickly and easily, and that females take more effort to pleasure.

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I think men are easier to please sexually, which may make a woman feel insecure if she isn't able to do it.

With my (sexual) husband, all I have to do is raise an eyebrow and he can get aroused. As an asexual, this can be annoying, but it is a feeling of power that I'm used to.

I can imagine a woman who wants to arouse a man, and is trying all sorts of stuff to do it, but he isn't interested in sex - if she is used to sexual interest being a determination of his interest, she may feel completely useless.

welcome to the board damnitsham. :)

hawke

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Weird, all the stories I've read indicate that males achieve pleasure quickly and easily, and that females take more effort to pleasure.

Perhaps it's a continuum sort of thing, like a lot of other aspects of sexuality - maybe men are on average more easy to please, but there could be easier and harder-to-please men and easier and harder-to-please women.

Anyway! Welcome to AVEN, damnitsham! :cake:

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Wow what can I say? I'm feeling mighty welcomed by you all and thankyou... It's hard to try and explain yourself within a general society who expect normality.

Solodric, I can understand you, and I have in fact been keeping dry as of late. But then again: Can you forget to ride a bike after you have learnt to ride for so many years?

Jamiemeister, I've been hearing mighty things about you from LonePiper (loving the avatar!), and no arguments towards your misunderstanding. But dude, some of these kids have a point.

Razust OMFG, you've hit the nail on it's head! I would like to say it has to do with my opinion on the matter (and I have, may I add ['it's not you it's me scenario']), but I rarely have any say in the matter. I'm inclined to make both genders equal, but the general populace have difficulty accepting that, why I don't know. Maybe they are missing out big time on such a society as yours', perhaps?

Silly Green Monkey knows what I'm talking about, and they're not stories. If they were, I wouldn't have this trouble.

And hawke, you've got the score too. Imagine if you lost that 'eyebrow raising' power you currently possess with your husband?

And Hallucigenia, I wish I could work with the average, but it's just not me. I am NOT the AVERAGE.

Anyways... Thanks for the invite kids {non-comittal term of affection}, I appreciate it. Maybe we can bounce off each other. And I'm always happy to help out with any questions I can answer. Worst case scenario, talk to LonePiper.

damnitsham

:)

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Erm... I told him you had a cool avatar. I swear that's all I said! ;)

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str8fuknpimpin

Jamiemeister, I've been hearing mighty things about you from LonePiper .

hmm is that a good thing? :)

watch it mo-fo...she's miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine! :twisted: :twisted:

:wink:

*quietly slinks away* owh, i'm gonna get bitty-slapped for that one.. :? :roll:

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