Skycaptain Posted July 13, 2020 Share Posted July 13, 2020 That joke's nearly as clichéd, boring and unoriginal as you. You're eyes are sapphire like the sea, and your hair golden like the sands. Your skin is silky like my bedsheets. I'll show you Link to post Share on other sites
Aquatic Paradox Posted July 13, 2020 Share Posted July 13, 2020 Your eyes are like a wastewater pond, your hair as greasy as a KFC, and your skin is like sandpaper. No thanks. Would you like to attend the firework show? We could make our own fireworks when it's finished. Link to post Share on other sites
ThatDamAsexual Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 Fireworks are like your personality: loud, annoying, and can only be tolerated for short periods of time, so no thanks. Hey my mama's Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight? *name's Link to post Share on other sites
Missing Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 Funny you should use that pickup line, because "blue screen of death" was my prison name. I can't think of a cheesy pick-up line, because I'm too distracted by your beauty. Link to post Share on other sites
Peachier Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 i can't think of a response to that sentence, because i'm too distracted by the cringe my doctor says i'm lacking vitamin u Link to post Share on other sites
Fraggle Underdark Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 I hear sewage is a great source of that vitamin. I wish I was your first derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves. Link to post Share on other sites
Aquatic Paradox Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 I’d be persuaded by your money talk and if we were in a Michelin Stared restaurant. But this is a McDonalds, so stop talking bollocks. I’m feeling too dumb for pick up lines, so we can just go for a piss up and bang, innit? Link to post Share on other sites
ThatDamAsexual Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 Yeah. Where you piss off and bang your head against the brick on the way out. Is it just me, or is the brightest thing in the universe standing right across from me? Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted July 15, 2020 Author Share Posted July 15, 2020 Are you calling me an exploding ball of gas? Rude Just call me the International Space Station, because I'm constantly falling for you Link to post Share on other sites
ThatDamAsexual Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 Yeah, but I'm millions of miles away, and moving at high speeds, so you'll be falling for a while. Are you a wii remote? Because I want to bang you against the wall ; ) (That made me uncomfortable typing it) Link to post Share on other sites
Aquatic Paradox Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 If by bang you mean blow my brains out, I'd rather do it myself after that proposal. If you could be a bird what would you be? I think we'd make a good pair of shags. Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted July 17, 2020 Author Share Posted July 17, 2020 Sorry, I'm actually a penguin, and I'm all out of rocks to give. I'm a birdwatcher, and I have to say.., what a lovely pair of tits Link to post Share on other sites
Fraggle Underdark Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 Funny, because I'm a murderer of birdwatchers. You look more beautiful to me than chickens look to Gonzo. Link to post Share on other sites
Missing Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 You have until the count of 3 to walk away. 1 ah ah ah... 2 ah ah ah... If you're half as nice as you look, then you're probably the nicest person I'll ever meet. Link to post Share on other sites
SithLord Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 Well you look way meaner than my usual crowd. Was it on purpose or were you born like that? Do you like Star Wars? Because Yoda only one for me. Link to post Share on other sites
Aquatic Paradox Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 Star Wars I like, but like you I don’t. Can you feel the force between us? Or is it just your allure? Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted July 17, 2020 Author Share Posted July 17, 2020 Luke here, you're Leia - ing it on a bit thick! Wookie move! You half-witted, scruffy looking nerf herder. *Jedi hand wave* This conversation is over. (EDIT: Ninja'd but it still works) Are you the Borg? Because resisting you is futile Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 Borg-off 😋😋 Seeing you makes me feel like I'm floating on air Link to post Share on other sites
Aquatic Paradox Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 That’s because I spiked your drink. Now that I have met you, my suffering has ended and I have reached enlightenment. Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted July 17, 2020 Author Share Posted July 17, 2020 Isn't that what happens when you die? *leans forward, without breaking eye contact, and whispers* and I haven't even killed you yet. Are you Jesus' poop, because Holy Crap! Link to post Share on other sites
Grey-Ace Ventura Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 Ummm, no, not even close... although if you wanna leave the devil a message, I'll give it to him once I head back home If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd make it say "u r a q t" Link to post Share on other sites
Fraggle Underdark Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 8 hours ago, Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion said: Are you Jesus' poop, because Holy Crap! I literally lol'ed at this. But *ahem* getting around to trying to shut it down instead... I'm Buddhist, go suck an egg. I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put myself in your pants. Edit: ninja'd, but what a coincidence that our pick up lines were so similar! Too weird of a coincidence to remove. An intrepid pick-up-line-shoot-down-er might have a simultaneous response to both... Link to post Share on other sites
Aquatic Paradox Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 Не интересно. Do you like this new tattoo of your face on my arm? Link to post Share on other sites
ThatDamAsexual Posted July 18, 2020 Share Posted July 18, 2020 I think you're mistaken, because I don't look that ugly. They really botched that tattoo... oh wait. I was looking in the wrong spot that's just your face. Are you an air conditioner? Because you sure are cool Link to post Share on other sites
Missing Posted July 18, 2020 Share Posted July 18, 2020 I sure am, because I'm about to eliminate all this hot air that just blew over in my direction. Are you a phaser? Because you're set to stunning! Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted July 18, 2020 Author Share Posted July 18, 2020 Damnit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a love interest! I'm a Vulcan and I do not understand your human obsession with intercourse. Perhaps you could teach me to understand it? Link to post Share on other sites
Grey-Ace Ventura Posted July 18, 2020 Share Posted July 18, 2020 Go Picard up someone else because you ain't La-cute-as Are you an alien? Because I'd let you probe me any day Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted July 18, 2020 Author Share Posted July 18, 2020 I am, and I appreciate the offer, however we really need a deeper understanding of humans. How do you feel about vivasection? So much more informative, yes? Oh, forgive me, why am I asking you? The opinion of specimens is unimportant. I'm no Deanna Troi, but I can sense that you're wildly attracted to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Sylenzo Posted October 11, 2020 Share Posted October 11, 2020 well, there doesn't seem to be a deck I must be in space, cause I can see my whole world right here Link to post Share on other sites
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