38silvertears Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 Im 16, female and have always identified as bi however i have never gotten "frisky" with anyone and ive never even been in a relationship so ive never kissed someone. I get turned on by porn sometimes but i never masturbate to it and i have tried maturation and it was not fun and i didnt get aroused.should i be feeling this was because its really weird i dont even want a relationship but im 100% a people person and love my friends to bits.nobody has ever told me that this is a phase and im kinda worried as i want to be in a relationship sometime in the future. Oh and i dont want any children if that helps. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 Some asexuals masturbate, some don't (these can be called non-libidoists but you don't have to include it in your orientation). Are you Biromantic/have crushes on both sexes, or just view males and females equally and assume you're bi from that? (I'm asking because you said you don't desire a relationship and I've heard many aromantics formerly believe the latter. Being aromantic doesn't mean you're heartless or not a people person, it just means you aren't capable of romantic feelings or do not desire such a relationship despite being capable of those feelings. Aromantics are perfectly capable of platonic love and other values.) Considering that 15 is the typical end mark for sexual awakening and you're 16, I'd say it isn't likely that you're going through a phase. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
verily-forsooth-egads Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 You've described your sexual and romantic history, your libido, your social expression, and your romantic desire. None of these define your sexuality. The only thing that does is whether or not you find other people sexually attractive. And it's totally okay if you don't know. It's not an answer that comes easily to everyone. I'd recommend doing some reading on the wiki to get a better idea of the different types of attraction and such, first. The most important distinction most people aren't used to thinking of is between sexual and romantic attraction, and an understanding of that should at least point you in the right direction toward figuring out your identity. Also of note, for reference, is the concept of libido. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
38silvertears Posted July 1, 2015 Author Share Posted July 1, 2015 Are you Biromantic/have crushes on both sexes, or just view males and females equally and assume you're bi from that? (I'm asking because you said you don't desire a relationship and I've heard many aromantics formerly believe the latter. i firmly believe that gender is not what makes a person a person so i have little preference to which gender i hang out around, this is why i identified as bi, but while i have crushes on people its always been because of their appearance/personality or abilities and not their gender. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Pengwyn Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 Are you Biromantic/have crushes on both sexes, or just view males and females equally and assume you're bi from that? (I'm asking because you said you don't desire a relationship and I've heard many aromantics formerly believe the latter. i firmly believe that gender is not what makes a person a person so i have little preference to which gender i hang out around, this is why i identified as bi, but while i have crushes on people its always been because of their appearance/personality or abilities and not their gender. Are your crushes sexual? Do you desire sexual interactions with them? If so, you would not be asexual, but could be somewhere on the spectrum. Or are they romantic, where you want a relationship (hugs, dates, maybe kisses), but not sex? This would make you biromantic. If you do not desire a romantic relationship your "crushes" could be what we call "squishes". These are Aromantic crushes, where you desire a Queerplatonic relationship, stronger than friendship but not romantic. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
38silvertears Posted July 1, 2015 Author Share Posted July 1, 2015 I think that im sometimes Biromantic about people, i like and enjoy physical contact but i dont want a relationship beyond friends, so is it right to use squishes instead of crushes if i feel this way? thank you so much to all who posted, your comments have been very helpful in the past days :) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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