AwkwardlyInvisible Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 If this has already been asked before, I do apologize. For future reference, can someone please give me a good explanation of the difference between asexuality and being repressed? I mean, I need a good way to explain it without going into an awful lot of detail. I also need some help figuring out exactly how to gently explain asexuality to my parents without opening the door to a bunch of embarrassing questions. Any help would be appreciated! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 Just look up he definition of repressed; it means to actively deny something, where as asexuals never have the impulse to do sexual things to other people. (Asexuals can have sex but they don't have the impulse to.) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AwkwardlyInvisible Posted June 25, 2015 Author Share Posted June 25, 2015 Right, and I know that. I'm still trying to figure out a way to explain that to my parents, neither one even knows what asexuality is. I have a feeling that they will find out what asexuality is sooner or later. I wish that they would find out from a neutral source (i.e., just stating that facts) like my brother did, and realize that it describes me perfectly. I have explained to them that I don't feel 'that' way about anyone, I only see them as friends and not as potential love interests. I almost always get the tried and true "How do you know until you try"; "How can you say that when you've never had a boyfriend"; "Don't knock it until you've tried it"; you get the idea. I am almost 100% sure that they would write it off as being repressed, trying to prove that a single woman doesn't need a man, not being able to get said man, or being turned 'off' because of emotional and mental abuse. It makes me sad to think that my parents might never accept it even if they did find out what this is, and therefore pity me because I am 'broken'. -_- Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Absol Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 You could try asking the rhetorical question "are you repressed because you don't feel sexual attraction towards the same sex?" It's the same for asexuals; they aren't repressed, they just don't feel that way about any people. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Prairie Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 As for explaining (to someone who wants to understand), asexuality is an orientation. If your parents think they respect gay people, then they should respect asexual people in the same way. As for the usual "how do you know?" maybe you could ask them what would be sufficient proof to them to accept it. If you tried sex with a male and sex with a female, would that be enough? If you went to a therapist and they said there was nothing repressed, would they accept you as asexual? Or would they forever hold out? (if so, it shows who's really unable to accept things) And would they demand this kind of proof if you had said you were gay? (fat chance, assuming they aren't homophobic). Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bob32 Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 I would quote some very good replies but I'm on mobile so it's hard to do multiple quotes. It sounds like you know this but repressed sexual people feel sexual urges and attraction but for one reason or another don't act on it. This normally causes distress. Asexuals don't feel sexual attraction or urges and don't feel distress. As for being repressed, is everyone except bisexuals repressed? Are your parents repressed because they haven't tried samesex relationships? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Elluna Hellen Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 Asexuality is like not desiring to eat donuts (or any other food XD) Being repressed is like being on a diet and not allowing yourself to eat it even though you really want it. Denying that you want to eat the donut, even. :P Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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