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Sex dreams? is that really a thing? [TMI]


allrightalready

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allrightalready

i just saw a mention of having sex dreams and i am wondering if i am the only one who does not have dreams about sex?

i think if i ever did have one (i am in my 50s) it would be worse than having any of the violent nightmares i have had from my PTSD

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Elluna Hellen

I never have them either.

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I'm 31 and I think I've had two in my entire life. They're very odd indeed.

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ShyFeather

I once had a dream that I made out with a friend of mine. After they had announced their engagement. I've never felt more disgusted with a dream in my life.

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You're not the only one. People in middle school and high school would talk about how they have several sex dreams... I'm 17 and I've yet to have a sex dream. The most intimate my dreams have gotten was soft cuddling and one of those quick, peck kisses. And even those are really rare to come by. I recall only 3 dreams like that.

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I've never had a dream involving sex. Just kissing and holding hands and that sort of thing.

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allrightalready

You're not the only one. People in middle school and high school would talk about how they have several sex dreams... I'm 17 and I've yet to have a sex dream. The most intimate my dreams have gotten was soft cuddling and one of those quick, peck kisses. And even those are really rare to come by. I recall only 3 dreams like that.

now this sounds like a nice dream

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I don't dream a lot (if I do, I don't usually remember it). But I do remember dreaming once or twice that I was making out and having sex with one of my friends. As if having a sex dream wasn't creepy enough, the person I dreamt of was a girl, which I thought it was very weird, because (AFAIK) I'm a heteroromantic ace. O.o

Anyway, it was almost a decade ago, and I'm glad it stopped (at least for now).

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Yes. I can't remember how many in my life and they're certainly not a very regular occurrence... but then they're never with anyone I know personally and I'm never "Me" in my dreams either. More a ... well a version of me that isn't me. Confusing I know.

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Warning maybe TMI:

When I was about 10 years old, I had a dream I was in the studio audience at a late night talk show. If I recall correctly, I think it was Letterman. There was nothing sexual about being there. It's not like everyone had their clothes off. It's not like I was naked on the stage in front of everyone. It was simply as if we were watching a normal live taping of the show.

So he looks out to the audience, and says in his signature comic tone, "Okay everyone, let's all tighten everything up!"

And boom, at the moment I woke up and found myself... um... nocturnally emitting.

So. Was it a sex dream? No idea.

Was it weird? Yes. Yes indeed.

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Probably unconnected, C-lo. At that age biology has a mind of its own :)

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I barely remember any of my dreams. So. I honestly dont know. But I did have a dream recently where they made a nightmare before christmas live action movie and jack and sally were lesbian lovers.

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That asexual guy

I've had wet dreams. But they never had sex. I always had to pee really bad in them. I actually thought that's why they were wet dreams until it was explained to me otherwise.

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Commander Werther

Ive had them and I dont mind them, I really dont mind the idea of sex tooo much (I dont like anything outside of dreams haha) and I dont mind it when if I have that dream, in those dreams its usually with whatever guy Im currently 'dating' and it happens only rarely so Im not bothered. I think Id be bothered if I had them ALL the time

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My sexual friend told me that she has dreams about sex and the morning after etc (with a weird dream twist as per usual in any dream) but the furthest I ever got with anyone in any of my dreams (which are insanely vivid) is a hug or kiss. There was an almost sex 'scene' but it wasn't me. It was someone else. I personally think dreams reflect conscious thoughts and are further evidence of potential asexual nature.

I hope your PTSD nightmares don't bother you too much, all the best!

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allrightalready

My sexual friend told me that she has dreams about sex and the morning after etc (with a weird dream twist as per usual in any dream) but the furthest I ever got with anyone in any of my dreams (which are insanely vivid) is a hug or kiss. There was an almost sex 'scene' but it wasn't me. It was someone else. I personally think dreams reflect conscious thoughts and are further evidence of potential asexual nature.

I hope your PTSD nightmares don't bother you too much, all the best!

three years into recovery from the incident and things are getting better thanks :)

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They're rare for me, but they do happen.

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Mine I always find to be disturbing... They always revolve around my close friends, and as someone who's already borderline sex-averse, it's actually pretty sickening. I find it super-difficult to look at them the next day, because the scene always plays out again in my mind's eye...

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allrightalready

Mine I always find to be disturbing... They always revolve around my close friends, and as someone who's already borderline sex-averse, it's actually pretty sickening. I find it super-difficult to look at them the next day, because the scene always plays out again in my mind's eye...

this makes me even more glad not to have them

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Autumn Season

I had a few and I have no idea what caused them. They weren't pleasant, more like night mares and when I woke up I was always very disturbed.

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fish of hearts

I'm 31 and I think I've had two in my entire life. They're very odd indeed.

Thirty-five, and same: just two. They were not about sex with other people. Not unpleasant, but still strange.

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Probably unconnected, C-lo. At that age biology has a mind of its own :)

I'd say that's true for any age. :(

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Sex dreams are one of the most common type of dreams. I remember hearing from scientists that most people have at least one per night, but people usually don't remember them. Generally, you only remember one if you wake up during it

I wouldn't know if asexual people have as many of those as allosexual people. But even allosexual people only remember a small fraction of those. Some people never even remember their dream (sexual or otherwise).

Not remembering that you had sex dreams, ever, may mean that you didn't, or that you simply don't remember them (which is good as sex dreams are often very disturbing and not at all representative of what the person would actually enjoy or want).

But yes, they are definitely a thing. A very common thing, according to studies made on people while they sleep (based on their brain activity and arousal).

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Lost247365

If I have had any, I do not remember them.

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givememyname

I've had like... 3 sex dreams during my entire life (I'm 27) but I'm not actually having sex during these dreams, I'm just feeling a lot of pleasure, if you know what I mean (WOAH! TMI).

Thankfully I've never had dreams about any of my friends of anyone I know. This could be really awkward.

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Crowfather

I can't recall my dreams ever, if I even dream at all.
Last time was a nightmare when I was little and the Looney Tunes were all trying to kill me, so no erotic subconscious here.

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I have had them......they are awful. It totally sucks but normally my brain wakes me up from them and I can run to a bathroom. But it isn't ever me having sex, normally it is like watching a porn or something in my sleep.

But yeah, totally awful so you should be super happy to not get them, I wish I didn't!

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TheKindredSoul

Unfortunately (but fortunately for most other people in the world), sex dreams do occur regardless if one is asexual or not. I used to get a lot of sex dreams, though the sex itself does not....translate well.

It is more like cuddling naked....and the person who I am supposed to be "having sex" with has no pelvis (and neither do I). If they even try to have sex with me, there will be nothing there. Oh yeah...the most disturbing part of my dreams is that they involve close friends who are girls. :redface: I went through these dreams a lot while I was questioning my asexuality and romantic orientation, so I think that was the reason why I got these dreams. I am a non-libidoist aromantic asexual by the way, so I literally get no response from these dreams other than "What the heck was that all about?!"...then awkwardly fall back to sleep like nothing ever happened.. :blink: I envy the people who have never had sex dreams....they really are terrible even, if mine do not involve the real thing. Luckily, I do not get them anymore!

I can't recall my dreams ever, if I even dream at all.
Last time was a nightmare when I was little and the Looney Tunes were all trying to kill me, so no erotic subconscious here.

Everyone dreams. You biologically have to. Even if you do not remember them, you have many, many dreams. That is how we clear our neural pathways.

Oh, wow! :blink: That sounds horrifying! I am imagining a psycho ax-murderer Bugs Bunny chopping through a door, then peering his face through it, saying "Heeeeere's Bugsy, doc!". **shivers**

Mine I always find to be disturbing... They always revolve around my close friends, and as someone who's already borderline sex-averse, it's actually pretty sickening. I find it super-difficult to look at them the next day, because the scene always plays out again in my mind's eye...

Ewwwwwww! :wacko: Sex dreams with friends and family members are the worst to get! I think our brain just loves to troll us sometimes. Mine sure does, no matter what time of day it is. <_<

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LadyWallflower

I have never had a dream where I am having sex with anyone (or kissing or hugging or anything). I have had dreams where I am with someone, usually a guy but sometimes a girl, and we do fun stuff together. I never really thought much about these dreams until just recently, when I wondered if I was having these type of dreams instead of sex dreams. The entire idea of myself engaging in sex just seems so ridiculous.

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