Mr Robot Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 I thought I was Demisexual. I only experience sexual attraction when I have a close bond with the person. I have not yet experienced a close enough bond with someone to be 100% sure about Demi, but I am somewhat sure if I experience sexual attraction, it would have to be with someone close. But after looking more into things, I'm thinking I may be Gray Asexual? I do sometimes find someone hot. I don't exactly think about sex with them, but I do rarely find someone hot/ very good looking type of thing. I don't know if that would be Gray Asexual or if I'm Demisexual. I don't know if you could be both? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SkyWorld Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 Hullo, nice to meet you and welcome! I could relate to you here, I also thought that I was demisexual and then considered grey-a. Although my situation is a little different, I have experienced sexual attraction at all and I was just going by what I "think" would happen in the future. Really it's all about what you feel right here and right now. Demisexual is part of the grey-a spectrum. Grey-a (grey-asexual) is experiencing sexual attraction rarely or under specific circumstances. Here's AVENwiki's definition of grey-a. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 Sexual attraction: someone's presence is sexually arousing and you have a desire/impulse to do sexual things to/with that person. Alone they do not make it. What is sexual strictly involves genital arousal in any direct or indirect way. Your body may find things sexual/react with arousal, but actions should not be called sexual unless you want them done for the arousal. Aesthetic attraction: a fixation on someone because of their looks and or mannerisms; having a pull to look at them. It is different from recognizing good looks/ what is "aesthetically pleasing" with no fixation. This does not automatically mean a romantic or platonic relationship is desired but attractions can be felt with other attractions. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Robot Posted May 22, 2015 Author Share Posted May 22, 2015 I think I am more aesthetically or sensually attracted to people. Is there a certain term when you are only aesthetically or sensually attracted to someone? Or do you just say you are only "aesthetically attracted" to people. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 does this aesthetic and sensual attraction not include romantic attraction (the soft fuzzy feelings)? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Robot Posted May 22, 2015 Author Share Posted May 22, 2015 I don't get those feelings just by looking at them really. I might get a little, but it's not much. I just find them attractive or hot or super cute? I would find it nice to cuddle or hug or something of that sort. That's really all. I don't think I have experience sexual attraction. I can sometimes heavily experience romantic attraction. Such as if someone does something super nice and I'm in a good mood, I really just want to compliment them and love them and make them happy. Be romantically involved, but that's it. When it comes to being attracted to a stranger such as I was saying, I sometimes find them hot or cute or whatever. I might think it would be nice to hug and such, as I said. I think mainly their voice, personality have something to do with if I feel romantically attracted or get those fuzzy feelings. If they have a nice voice, personality, AND face, I might find them attractive or hot. But I can't even imagine myself having it with that person. No matter who. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 Theres no needed name for just finding someone aesthetically attractive, but if you want a sensual relationship without the romantic attraction aspect then there is a queerplatonic relationship. Queerplatonic relationship (QPR): an emotionally platonic relationship that has characteristics of a romantic/sexual relationship. It can be an importance/closeness stronger than the best friend norm, displaying platonic sensual attraction (only differing from romantic sensual attraction with chaste kissing, although preferring chaste kissing or no kissing does not make one’s feelings unromantic), friends with sexual benefits, romantically pleasing someone you platonically love (QP to one and romantic to the other), or any combination of those. They may or may not have monogamy, live together, or look like a couple to the public. Romantics and Aromantics can have QPRs. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Robot Posted May 22, 2015 Author Share Posted May 22, 2015 I'm still quite confused. I believe what you meant by Queerplatonic is that they would want to feel someone. Hug, cuddle, etc. But not necessarily be in a relationship or romantically involved with them? I don't know if that's me or not. Like I said before, if someone is nice and cute to me, I want to hug and compliment them and make them feel good. Wouldn't that be romantic? Doing things for them, showing them how I care, how much they mean, etc. I don't know if I'd want a relationship. I'm bad with relationships. I might be happy in one at first, but even if I really like the person, I don't want to be in a relationship. I guess I would be Queerplatonic? I want a romantic and cute and sensual relationship, but not be dating or calling each other "boyfriend" or "girlfiend". Like the feeling of being in a relationship, but not in using the word "dating" Sort of thing. I hope I'm making sense. Thank you so much for helping me, too. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Robot Posted May 22, 2015 Author Share Posted May 22, 2015 I was thinking. I want to have something like a queerplatonic relationship? Something with a strong bond and commitment and love, but not saying were "dating". Like we act how people dating are, but I don't like saying I'm dating someone, etc. But I feel if I got close enough to them and really liked them, I would go into a real relationship with them? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 if someone is nice and cute to me, I want to hug and compliment them and make them feel good. Wouldn't that be romantic? Doing things for them, showing them how I care, how much they mean, etc. I don't know if I'd want a relationship. I'm bad with relationships. I might be happy in one at first, but even if I really like the person, I don't want to be in a relationship. I guess I would be Queerplatonic? I want a romantic and cute and sensual relationship, but not be dating or calling each other "boyfriend" or "girlfiend". Like the feeling of being in a relationship, but not in using the word "dating" Sort of thing. Demiromantic? feeling romantic attraction after a certain bond But if you just wana go out with someone without calling it dating or them your bf/gf, then you can also do that. Perhaps you feel pressured into expectations with those words, which is fine, relationship anarchy is fine. What you describe you want to do could be romantic attraction, but it could also be a form of platonic adorment. I had a few friends in high school that metaphorically went by the word mother or father and they did the same thing to me and our relationship was platonic. It was literally like Ouran High School Host Club-- well, the anime; they eventually feel romantically in the manga. Do you just wanna act like Haruhi's papa basically? Perhaps your a Lithromantic that wants a QPR? Lithromantic being the romantic reciprocation (over time or immediately or over time) causing indifference, loss of interest, or repulsion. According to AVEN "Romantic attraction is a very difficult thing to pin down. Put as simply as possible, it is a distinct fondness or affection toward someone that differs from what you would feel toward friends, family, or people you admire. It may be characterized by a unique, almost surreal anxious-euphoria when sensing or thinking about this person and is distinguishable from hero worship. It typically involves butterflies in the stomach, heart fluttering or “melting” when interacting with them, some obsessiveness, all over warm and fuzzy feeling, and being swept into a dreamy state of mind, but experiences may vary depending on the individual and intensity of the case. Desires such as wanting to bond or be physically close with them are extremely common when experiencing romantic attraction, but there is no desire exclusive to romantic attraction, nor are desires necessarily present at all when being romantically attracted to someone." So with all the wants and unwants that are possible in a romantic relationship, it's left up to an emotion, and emotions don't translate well into words so it's then left up to your own interpretation. But it at least involves soft/fuzzy feelings and a fixation which can differ in intensity by person. +=+ btw, your icon is from Jellyfish Princess, daiski Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Robot Posted May 22, 2015 Author Share Posted May 22, 2015 I do enjoy romance, making people happy, and yes when someone is nice or cute to me, with a great personality and such, I sometimes get butterflies. I want to be friends with them, make them happy as I said, but not date. Whenever I go into relationships, I deeply like the person, but after awhile I start disliking being in a relationship. Everytime. I want to act like a relationship, but not necessarily date. I'm not sure if I am Lithromantic. At the beginning, I'd just admire them and be friends and such, but after a while, if I really like them. They have a great personality, nice, and all, I would want them to feel the same. But thats only if I REALLY like them. I may even date them. So would I be Lithromantic wanting a QPR? And yes it is. I love the anime xD Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted May 29, 2015 Share Posted May 29, 2015 The english dub is crap tho. And why has no company translated the manga? They don't normally translate the anime but not the manga. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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