Jump to content

Can get aroused but can never "finish": male asexual problem


Recommended Posts

I am a male asexual (i think). I find that during kissing / caressing i can get aroused, but sex feels like work and i can never "finish". Anyone else can relate to this? I've had several partners / attempts at sex, but the same result....

Link to post
Share on other sites

Ehhh...if you're sexually attracted to people, you're not asexual. Asexual has nothing to do with sexual dysfunction.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't know how you feel but if sex feels like work, then maybe you don't actually want to finish? Arousal can be enjoyable without following through on it.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Acting sexually toward someone you're not sexually attracted to can be an arousal deterrent, asexuals can have problems with arousal, orgasming, and less pleasure.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes. Yes I can relate.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Autumn Season

Cannot relate (because I'm female), but heard a similar story from a male friend (who's relatively sexual though). He find's it easier without the pressure of having to go all the way.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe it's more of an emotional thing than an asexual thing. If it feels like a chore there is more to it in my opinion. I don't mind the kissing and touching stuff but I don't get aroused by it. The thought of sex however makes me feel disgusted. I like that I don't have to put up with putting out. I dunno. Maybe talk to yr GP and make sure everything is medically ok and go from there.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone....now i feel the best option is to go back to the GP, even though my bloodwork was fine the first time, including normal testosterone levels. I've had a history of anxiety...so perhaps that is the ultimate culprit that's making sex feel like work. It's confusing quite frankly. It's causing enormous stress with my current girl i'm seeing. I appreciate your responses!!

Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone....now i feel the best option is to go back to the GP, even though my bloodwork was fine the first time, including normal testosterone levels. I've had a history of anxiety...so perhaps that is the ultimate culprit that's making sex feel like work. It's confusing quite frankly. It's causing enormous stress with my current girl i'm seeing. I appreciate your responses!!

Link to post
Share on other sites

Sex has always felt like work. I enjoyed all the things leading up to the "finish", but never the "finish" itself. The foreplay and intimacy were great, but the actual sex act was never good.

As I can "finish" when I'm alone, I'm sure, for me, that it's not a medical issue. I am Asexual and loving it!

Link to post
Share on other sites
TheLycanthrope

The few times I have had (reluctant) sex with people to rid myself of the virgin stigma I never finished. It wasn't pleasurable at all. With masturbation I can get myself aroused after some working and thinking etc. but it can take a while to finish, sometimes I have just given up. When you don't find other people sexually attractive it can be hard to get yourself aroused (but that is why we have the internet). So, I can relate a litle bit. . . but it has never been a major problem of mine.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I hate the fact I could be ace...really hating it. Prospects of no children, no partner, I feel castrated from society. Oh well, it's a bombshell but I suppose I can adapt to the reality : (

Link to post
Share on other sites

Being ace does not mean no partner or no children. If you can masturbate, you can have kids. Finding a compatable partner may be hard, but not impossible. :)

Link to post
Share on other sites

A positive attitude is a good first step. ;)

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...