ItWasNiceKnowingYou Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 I started this thread based on the experience I'd recently had. This person asked me "How do you know you don't like sex if you've never done it?!?!!? Sex has better benefits!" And I instantly reply "I don't know. Hey why don't you go jump off a bridge 'cause I heard the air quality is soooo much better than air conditioning!!!!" (O.O)...they say nothing. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SorryNotSorry Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 In another thread a couple of months ago, I posted "asexuals don't give a fuck". If I remember right, it got 30 likes within a week. For asexuals, DILLIGAF (=do I look like I give a fuck?) takes on a more literal meaning. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
verily-forsooth-egads Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Best one I ever saw (I wish I could remember who posted it) went something like "How do you know you don't like sex if you've never tried it?" "How do you know you wouldn't like stuffing ten dirty socks in your mouth?" "Ew! Of course I wouldn't like that!" "Oh, don't worry, it's just a phase." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Chibihuahua Chan Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 I was asked "don't you have any URGES?" my reply was "to stab people? Yes, but I never act on them." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SorryNotSorry Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 I'm like, ehhh... most people who crave sex are just after the endorphin hit, unless they're trying to make a baby. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DiEvAl Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 "But relationships without sex are just friendships!" "So you wouldn't mind my relationship with your datefriend as long as it doesn't involve sex? How nice of you!" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ElectricMongoose Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 In another thread a couple of months ago, I posted "asexuals don't give a fuck". If I remember right, it got 30 likes within a week. For asexuals, DILLIGAF (=do I look like I give a fuck?) takes on a more literal meaning. We don't give any F***s we only give Cakes. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 I just tell them: Look, you keep your sex talk to yourself and ill keep myself safe and sane from sex-craving wannabees like you, OK? It usually works for me Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ItWasNiceKnowingYou Posted May 23, 2015 Author Share Posted May 23, 2015 "Why don't you like shopping & makeup & other stuff like that?" " Do I look like a cis-sy to you?!" Didn't realize the pun until later though;p Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Merci Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 "If you don't want sex, then you should probably get your hormones checked, because that is not normal." "If you really care that much then you can drive me. And while we are at it, you might want to get an MRI to check your brain because I think it is underdeveloped." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Retronaut Posted May 25, 2015 Share Posted May 25, 2015 'You're telling me you don't like sex and don't want it, but I'm sure if you did actually have it you'd start to like it.' 'That's interesting, can I ask your thoughts on corrective rape?' Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Calvet Posted May 27, 2015 Share Posted May 27, 2015 'You're telling me you don't like sex and don't want it, but I'm sure if you did actually have it you'd start to like it.' 'That's interesting, can I ask your thoughts on corrective rape?' That's fantastic! I really have to find a way to make it work in French too, it would be soooo worth it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mycroft is Yourcroft Posted May 27, 2015 Share Posted May 27, 2015 That's fantastic! I really have to find a way to make it work in French too, it would be soooo worth it. On est d'accord! Alors vous en pensez quoi du viol correctif? Or would 'D'ailleurs, vous en pensez quoi du viol correctif?' work better? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WhatsSheCalled Posted May 27, 2015 Share Posted May 27, 2015 "You can't be asexual unless you reproduce by yourself" "Your nose can't be running, it doesn't have feet. Words have different meanings, you realise?" (or say something about the different meanings of the words gay and straight) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rwkropf Posted May 27, 2015 Share Posted May 27, 2015 "You can't be asexual unless you reproduce by yourself" "Your nose can't be running, it doesn't have feet. Words have different meanings, you realise?" (or say something about the different meanings of the words gay and straight) I generally like to correct their grammar by stating that asexual means non sexual, so asexual reproduction means non sexual reproduction. Seeing as asexual means not sexual, if a person is asexual, it means that he/she is not sexual. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
R_of_C Posted May 30, 2015 Share Posted May 30, 2015 Best one I ever saw (I wish I could remember who posted it) went something like "How do you know you don't like sex if you've never tried it?" "How do you know you wouldn't like stuffing ten dirty socks in your mouth?" "Ew! Of course I wouldn't like that!" "Oh, don't worry, it's just a phase." I think I'm just going to take that and stash it away for a rainy day. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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