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What Is Asexuality?


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I didn't like this article. It goes on and on and on about sexual attraction, without definitively explaining what it means by sexual attraction. So anyone can take any random definition of sexual attraction, apply it to this article, and say ''ooh I must be ace'' .. nothing wrong with that, but I see a lot of the time people saying things like ''I never considered myself anything but heterosexual, I love sex and have always felt it's necessary in relationships, but I saw a definition of sexual attraction online that said ''wants sex with this person right now'' ** and I've never really felt that. After reading all this stuff about asexuality and how it's all about sexual attraction, I'm starting to think I'm asexual'' .. things like that. Whereas if people just gave AVENs definition of sexual attraction whenever writing articles like this (ones that go on and on about sexual attraction) that kind of confusion would be avoided. Sexual Attraction: the desire to have partnered sex with someone else, to share your sexuality with them. ... ''Do you innately desire to connect with other people on a sexual level?'' ''do you see sex as an integral part of your enjoyment in romantic relationships?'' etc etc. Much easier than just throwing around a wishy washy term the meaning of which no one can agree upon.

**there are a lot of random obscure definitions online.

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Small point of correction and a request...

Correction: WhatIsAsexuality.com is not the same site as Asexuality Archive, so this page is not actually from AA. It should be attributed to WIA.

Request: Can you only include a summary or excerpt of the page with the link, instead of posting the entire contents? That way, people will be encouraged to visit the site, where they'll get the full experience (and latest updates). For instance, this particular page has a bunch of printable resources that they might be interested in (And I may add more at any time), but they're not showing up here. Plus, I want to have a sense of the number of readers I have. If no one ends up on my site because full pages are being quoted elsewhere, I'll think no one's reading what I've written, and I'll be less likely to write more in the future.

As for the lack of a definition of sexual attraction: That's deliberate. Everyone has a different definition, because everyone who experiences it feels something different. I don't think it's necessary to put a specific definition on the concept, primarily because I have no idea how to define it because I don't know what it is. I do know that I disagree with that definition in your signature, because I have had a "desire to have sexual contact with someone else". It was a logical decision, rather than some innate impulse. The train of thought was something like this: "She wants to have sex with me. Sex will probably feel good for me. I am curious to know what sex is like. I am comfortable with her. Let's give this a try." I can recognize that there is something that is not present in that decision, something that I know she felt, something that I know most other people feel.

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I didn't like this article. It goes on and on and on about sexual attraction, without definitively explaining what it means by sexual attraction. So anyone can take any random definition of sexual attraction, apply it to this article, and say ''ooh I must be ace'' .. nothing wrong with that, but I see a lot of the time people saying things like ''I never considered myself anything but heterosexual, I love sex and have always felt it's necessary in relationships, but I saw a definition of sexual attraction online that said ''wants sex with this person right now'' ** and I've never really felt that. After reading all this stuff about asexuality and how it's all about sexual attraction, I'm starting to think I'm asexual'' .. things like that. Whereas if people just gave AVENs definition of sexual attraction whenever writing articles like this (ones that go on and on about sexual attraction) that kind of confusion would be avoided. Sexual Attraction: the desire to have partnered sex with someone else, to share your sexuality with them. ... ''Do you innately desire to connect with other people on a sexual level?'' ''do you see sex as an integral part of your enjoyment in romantic relationships?'' etc etc. Much easier than just throwing around a wishy washy term the meaning of which no one can agree upon.

**there are a lot of random obscure definitions online.

What about cupiosexuals? Just curious.

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Small point of correction and a request...

Correction: WhatIsAsexuality.com is not the same site as Asexuality Archive, so this page is not actually from AA. It should be attributed to WIA.

Request: Can you only include a summary or excerpt of the page with the link, instead of posting the entire contents? That way, people will be encouraged to visit the site, where they'll get the full experience (and latest updates). For instance, this particular page has a bunch of printable resources that they might be interested in (And I may add more at any time), but they're not showing up here. Plus, I want to have a sense of the number of readers I have. If no one ends up on my site because full pages are being quoted elsewhere, I'll think no one's reading what I've written, and I'll be less likely to write more in the future.

I'm sorry, Redbeard, I made a mistake. This article was published on Twitter by Asexuality Archive (https://twitter.com/AceArchive/status/591826895055884288). I've just asked the Moderator to edit the title of the thread (I cannot do it myself). Thanks for your correction. I always post the links to my sources.

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I didn't like this article. It goes on and on and on about sexual attraction, without definitively explaining what it means by sexual attraction. So anyone can take any random definition of sexual attraction, apply it to this article, and say ''ooh I must be ace'' .. nothing wrong with that, but I see a lot of the time people saying things like ''I never considered myself anything but heterosexual, I love sex and have always felt it's necessary in relationships, but I saw a definition of sexual attraction online that said ''wants sex with this person right now'' ** and I've never really felt that. After reading all this stuff about asexuality and how it's all about sexual attraction, I'm starting to think I'm asexual'' .. things like that. Whereas if people just gave AVENs definition of sexual attraction whenever writing articles like this (ones that go on and on about sexual attraction) that kind of confusion would be avoided. Sexual Attraction: the desire to have partnered sex with someone else, to share your sexuality with them. ... ''Do you innately desire to connect with other people on a sexual level?'' ''do you see sex as an integral part of your enjoyment in romantic relationships?'' etc etc. Much easier than just throwing around a wishy washy term the meaning of which no one can agree upon.

**there are a lot of random obscure definitions online.

What about cupiosexuals? Just curious.
what do they have to do with the price of fish in New York? I'm talking about asexuals, not sexual people who don't feel aesthetic attraction.

And @ RedBeard, my God asexuality gets enough shit as it is without you adding to the confusion by refusing to define what asexuality is on an education website. Good job. It's bad ebough that AVEN won't put their definition of sexual attraction (the desire for partnered sex, the lack of which is what asexuality actually is) in a place that is more visible to the general public. But refusing to take a stance at all? lol. You disagree with what's in my signature? take it up with AVEN. But how would you know if it's incorrect though if you don't even know what sexual attraction is? Sexual Attraction IS the innate desire to connect with other people on a sexual level. look at any mixed relationship in distress and you have your answer as to what "sexual attraction" is right there. You don't want to define sexual attraction? Maybe you should ditch the use of the term all together then.

And Dutchess, why do you keep quoting entire articles without any commentary or even posting your thoughts on them?

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I didn't like this article. It goes on and on and on about sexual attraction, without definitively explaining what it means by sexual attraction. So anyone can take any random definition of sexual attraction, apply it to this article, and say ''ooh I must be ace'' .. nothing wrong with that, but I see a lot of the time people saying things like ''I never considered myself anything but heterosexual, I love sex and have always felt it's necessary in relationships, but I saw a definition of sexual attraction online that said ''wants sex with this person right now'' ** and I've never really felt that. After reading all this stuff about asexuality and how it's all about sexual attraction, I'm starting to think I'm asexual'' .. things like that. Whereas if people just gave AVENs definition of sexual attraction whenever writing articles like this (ones that go on and on about sexual attraction) that kind of confusion would be avoided. Sexual Attraction: the desire to have partnered sex with someone else, to share your sexuality with them. ... ''Do you innately desire to connect with other people on a sexual level?'' ''do you see sex as an integral part of your enjoyment in romantic relationships?'' etc etc. Much easier than just throwing around a wishy washy term the meaning of which no one can agree upon.

**there are a lot of random obscure definitions online.

What about cupiosexuals? Just curious.
what do they have to do with the price of fish in New York? I'm talking about asexuals, not sexual people who don't feel aesthetic attraction.

And @ RedBeard, my God asexuality gets enough shit as it is without you adding to the confusion by refusing to define what asexuality is on an education website. Good job. It's bad ebough that AVEN won't put their definition of sexual attraction (the desire for partnered sex, the lack of which is what asexuality actually is) in a place that is more visible to the general public. But refusing to take a stance at all? lol. You disagree with what's in my signature? take it up with AVEN. But how would you know if it's incorrect though if you don't even know what sexual attraction is? Sexual Attraction IS the innate desire to connect with other people on a sexual level. look at any mixed relationship in distress and you have your answer as to what "sexual attraction" is right there. You don't want to define sexual attraction? Maybe you should ditch the use of the term all together then.

And Dutchess, why do you keep quoting entire articles without any commentary or even posting your thoughts on them?

I was under the impression that cupiosexual is someone who desires a sexual relationship but doesn't experience sexual attraction? But then, I'm not even going to pretend I know all the different labels. :wacko:

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Request: Can you only include a summary or excerpt of the page with the link, instead of posting the entire contents? That way, people will be encouraged to visit the site, where they'll get the full experience (and latest updates). For instance, this particular page has a bunch of printable resources that they might be interested in (And I may add more at any time), but they're not showing up here. Plus, I want to have a sense of the number of readers I have. If no one ends up on my site because full pages are being quoted elsewhere, I'll think no one's reading what I've written, and I'll be less likely to write more in the future.

I've just edited my post. I removed the entire content of your article. I put only an index and a link.

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And Dutchess, why do you keep quoting entire articles without any commentary or even posting your thoughts on them?

Just knowing they exist is useful. It's good to know where and how asexuality is being picked up in the media, otherwise how can we make any kind of comment on visibility?

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And Dutchess, why do you keep quoting entire articles without any commentary or even posting your thoughts on them?

Just knowing they exist is useful. It's good to know where and how asexuality is being picked up in the media, otherwise how can we make any kind of comment on visibility?

Indeed! World Watch forum is to make the community aware of asexuality appearing in the media, and SpanishDuchess is making a marvellous job at it! Everyone is welcome to share their opinions on articles and alike, but people don't necessarily have to :)

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