The Spout - I am Not a Robot, I am Asexual

[Guest]

I am Not a Robot, I am Asexual

By Joshua Garret, 8th April 2015
Link: http://thespout.co.uk/i-am-asexual/

Recently, I have been looking for representation of an asexual individual in film. I’d hoped for positive representation, but after much searching decided that almost any representation would be better than none. When I began my search, I did not think it would be so difficult to find something as it has been. In the world of cinema, everyone wants sex.Why? Because, as the old adage goes, “Sex Sells.” Straight films, queer films, it does not matter. Sex is everywhere in the media, and this has made my seemingly simple task of finding representation of asexual individuals in film – specifically mainstream films – horrifically difficult.

While there are a number of Indie productions that feature asexual characters, such as The Olivia Experiment, these lack the exposure and visibility of mainstream films. Mainstream films are vital to visibility because of their broad accessibility.



“finding representation of asexual individuals in film [is] horrifically difficult”


I figured that science fiction would be a likely place to start, but even there I found few solid candidates. Beginning to feel discouraged, I brought the matter up with a couple of friends and one of them suggested looking at characters that are robots/androids. Characters such as Sonny from I, Robot, HAL 9000 from 2001: A Space Odyssey, Ash from Alien, or David from A.I. He was right. There are a lot of characters that can be seen as representing asexuality in science fiction and almost all of them are robots. My friends had the best of intentions, but after noticing this trend all I was able to take from this notion was that The only representation you can hope to find in film and media is in characters who don’t have souls or free will. If you are asexual, you might as well be a robot. I am not a robot.



“If you are asexual, you might as well be a robot.”


I am asexual. That doesn’t mean I lack a soul or free will. It just means that I do not experience sexual attraction to anyone, male or female. Being asexual is not a sexual preference nor is it choice or a phase that one goes through. It is a a part of who I am. It means my life, my existence, is not dominated by my desire to fuck and yet, thanks to the pervasiveness of sex in the media, I find myself constantly surrounded by reminders of just how abnormal I apparently am.

My own desires – or lack thereof – don’t often translate well to others. Even among those I consider to be some of my closest friends, those I have come out to, I have been told “No one is really asexual. You just haven’t found the right person yet.” Is there really such a lack of asexual representation in our culture that people don’t even believe it exists? That might sound hard to believe, but from my own experiences it is sometimes the case.



“I find myself constantly surrounded by reminders of just how abnormal I apparently am”


Among members of the local LGBTQ community, my experiences have been mixed. For every supportive and understanding individual I encounter who is willing to accept me for who I am, I meet another who is dismissive or who even outright rejects my orientation. Many bi and transgender individuals have had a difficult time in finding acceptance within certain circles of the LGBTQ community. I have felt similar rejection as an asexual individual. For a demographic that cries out so passionately for acceptance, there are some who are still unable to accept those different from themselves.

I long to see myself represented in film as something more than a robot or other form of semi-sentient computer. I want to be represented as a human being, as someone who has wants and desires that are not all that dissimilar from anyone else. My lack of desire for sex does not equate to a lack of desire for camaraderie, friendship, and a sense of belonging. Being asexual does not make me any less human than anyone else.

I am not a robot, dammit, and I want the world to be able to see that.

[nerdperson777]

I say I'm a robot, but it's not purely because I am ace. I say so because I was raised as a cold individual who understood nothing but getting on the path to a successful future. Yes, I'm ace and aro, but I know that shouldn't be the reason why I am a robot. There's more than an emotional aspect (or lack of it) to be a robot. I think of my robot-ness as just strictly doing tasks as they are. Don't care how it's done but I get it done. The most straightforward way is the best one, unless I suddenly decided to be silly.

[catsaregood]

And equally, I've heard plenty of sexuals describe themselves as robots or robot-like, when they're tired, or super-busy and just going from one thing to another...

This is a great article, well written, and an important comment on how difficult our visibility issues are. Thanks for posting!

[LKR]

Yes the idea that you can have emotions and not desire sex is foreign to many people.