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Masturbation

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Peeps   
Peeps

I have a question that probably sounds kinda dumb, but I'm asking it because I need to know.

I'm female and I do not masturbate, and never have any desire to put anything either near my lower regions, even less so inside.

Ocasionally I have some urges, ranging from mild to quite instense, usually during the week before my period when my oestrogen levels are at the highest, but I am never actually moved to the point where I just *have* to masturbate, the mere thought can sometimes be enough to abolish the urge altogether.

However, is this actually physically healthy? Should I release this tension the way my womb seems to want it released, or should I continue just chanelling the urge into art or writing or (if it's the middle of the night and I can't do either) listening to obscenely loud music on my earphones?

:?:

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Lady Heartilly   
Lady Heartilly

I'm not sure of the answer to that, but I can tell you're definitely not alone. I'm female and I've never masturbated except, according to my mom, one time when I was 6 which I don't remember at all. I've never felt an urge to do it and the idea quite frankly grosses me out. If you're not planning to have kids I don't think it matters whether it's healthy or not anyway because you're definitely not going to become physically ill from lack of masturbation. If you are planning to have kids, I still don't think it really matters but I have no way of knowing for sure.

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maco   
maco

Yeah, I've never felt the need to do that. I don't get near "down there" at all. I really doubt there are any health effects. I mean, in Victorian times female orgasm and "horniness" were so rare they were referred to as "feminine hysteria"

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jakendy   
jakendy

Oh, same here..never felt the need, urge,whatever..and I was quite scared when I hears some ppl saying that it's not normal..but it ain't health damaging!

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Amcan   
Amcan

I'm female and I have but only really at the time aorund my period, the urge got stronger.

But there is nothing wrong in not.

Frankly I would like some more self-control so I didn't do it.

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gymgirl   
gymgirl

I can definitely say there are NO negative health effects in NOT doing it (except loud music as in your case might damage your ears :wink: ).

Funny enough, nobody asks whether doing it causes damage...

Myself I never felt any inclination to do it, not even to "channelize" it in any way.

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Wineblood   
Wineblood
Funny enough, nobody asks whether doing it causes damage...

How many times have I said that about sex.. "Careful, it's not all positive, you know", but no one ever listens.

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Friendly   
Friendly

I'm female, and like you, I don't feel the urge/need to masturbate. I only go there for getting clean, and I don't even use tampons. The only suggestion I could make would be to go with the music. Music can be soooo relaxing . . .

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helana12_03   
helana12_03

I am a female and I do not masterbate, nor do I use tampons. I don't care about whether it's healthy or not, some people tried to convince me by telling me that I have to "explore my body" by doing this, but I think it just addicts people and streangthens their horneyness and need in sex.

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Jesse   
Jesse

helana12_02 and all,

No there is no risk or health dangers. if anything it is perhaps "healthier" not to. i am conducting a study quite soon based on people who "do" sexual activity and people who do not. and past research so far is suggesting that people are much more happier and experience less physical problems compared to people who are sexually active.

however if you want to speak to a sexologist they would come up with all sorts saying it;s unhealthy, not to worry though its there job to promote it, other wise people would not go and see them, no job = no money.:!:

And if you are and anyone else is interested in talking part in this study that will directly ask the question in regards to mental/physical well-being (health) compared to the two(sexual and nonsexual) as to whether there is a difference. it will involve simply filling out a questionnaire. will post a link up here in the near furture.

hope this helps. :)

p.s. am i right in thinking that asexuals dont have sex or mastubation and other related topics .

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FISH'   
FISH'

This topic has got me thinking, do sexuals experience the urge to masturbate as overpowering? I feel it every few days (usually when i rub my genitals against something by accident :oops: ) but I don't always do it because it seems pretty pointless and time-consuming.

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oneofthesun   
oneofthesun

It's a mater of willpower, like overcoming the urge to eat candy or whatever.

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FISH'   
FISH'
It's a mater of willpower, like overcoming the urge to eat candy or whatever.

That is one thing I can't do. In fact, I've just come back from my local corner-shop with £2.10 worth of chocolates.

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Wee_Little_Me   
Wee_Little_Me

It sounds like you dont even know HOW to masterbate.

Guys have it easy. Big shaft that inserts into woman. Hand replaces womans fleshy inside. Thus masterbation.

Women? Well if a guy can FIND the g-spot than all the power to him, but although missionary (regular) sex is penis in the vigina, thats NOT what female masterbation is. Unless it feels good. Then go for it. But female masterbation circulates around the clit (generally) which isnt anywhere near the hole.

Some people like different kinds of clit-rubbing, on different sides or in patterns. Of course the g-spot if anyone can manage to find that (some say wave towards yourself, others say its by the butt. So who the hell knows). Playing with the inner lips which are usually fare more sensitive than the outer lips. Whatever floats your boat.

You should probably try experimenting with touching yourself and see if you end up liking any of it. And try it in the bath and/or with a showerhead as well. Some women love the genlte soothing of the water.

Yeah, I've never felt the need to do that. I don't get near "down there" at all. I really doubt there are any health effects. I mean, in Victorian times female orgasm and "horniness" were so rare they were referred to as "feminine hysteria"

It is perfectly normal to masterbate and induce an orgasm, thank you very much. Further, 'female hystaria' was sexual deprovation, not an orgasm. The cure was a dildo which were crappy and wooden and mechanical and had a big metal screw and what-not (not something id want anywhere near my genitalia), but apparently it did the job and 'cured the hystaria'.

I am a female and I do not masterbate, nor do I use tampons. I don't care about whether it's healthy or not, some people tried to convince me by telling me that I have to "explore my body" by doing this, but I think it just addicts people and streangthens their horneyness and need in sex.

What? Are you saying tampons make people horny and addicted to sex? Or are you talking about masterbation? Either way you're WAY off the makr (ok, serious missconceptions amongs the people on this site about female masterbation).

You are the second to mention a tampon as if it has ANY relivance to this. The only far-winged relation between female masterbation and tampons is that females get hornier around their period, their period causes bleeding, bleeding is sometimes cleaned with a tampon rather than a pad.

Serious. NOTHING TO DO WITH IT!!!!

I do NOT masterbate. I do NOT have any desire to do so. But I SWEAR by tampons. I dont give a shit if you dont like them, but dont be leaving this conversaiton thinking there is ANY corrolation between tampons and sex. A tampon is not dirty. Neither is masterbation. Nor is your body. Its all in your head and you need to get over it. Maybe after you become more comfortable with yourself you'll even venture a little rub in various plces ;)

No there is no risk or health dangers. if anything it is perhaps "healthier" not to. i am conducting a study quite soon based on people who "do" sexual activity and people who do not. and past research so far is suggesting that people are much more happier and experience less physical problems compared to people who are sexually active.

I am quite confident that you will find your study will prove the exact opposite....as all studies before have shown, a healthy sex life is healthy for mind body and spirit.

This topic has got me thinking, do sexuals experience the urge to masturbate as overpowering? I feel it every few days (usually when i rub my genitals against something by accident :oops: ) but I don't always do it because it seems pretty pointless and time-consuming.

To my understanding they have sexual urges and sometimes fantasies. It doesnt matter to them HOW the sexual tention is released, just that it BE released. Obviously it is prefered on another human, thus the fantasy more real, but masterbation can be perfectly sufficent.

And just because I feel like putting this out there, there is actually a sexual 'problem' that occurs in some women. I think somewhere around 500 women in the US are diagnosed with this. I cant remember the exact name, i think its a 4-letter accranim that has 'sexual' in there somewhere, but its essenially an addiction to orgasm. They cant stop, urges occure all the time everywhere, cant leave the house because the need to touch oneself is too great to risk going out in public, and its nothing sexual at all, its just the need to get off. Must suck :(

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ghosts   
ghosts

Yeah, I've heard women who were "hysterical" would go to a doctor, who would essentially masturbate the women to orgasm to cure the "hysteria" (sexual deprivation). Eventually the vibrator became a popular alternative to that.

Er... ::stays away from the rest of the conversation for now::

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Wee_Little_Me   
Wee_Little_Me
Yeah, I've heard women who were "hysterical" would go to a doctor, who would essentially masturbate the women to orgasm to cure the "hysteria" (sexual deprivation). Eventually the vibrator became a popular alternative to that.

Er... ::stays away from the rest of the conversation for now::

Thank you! Someone else who recalls history correctly! The orgasm is female hystaria. Puh-leez. No wonder so many people are asexual. Theyre just down-right afraid of sex and will do anything to find something to support this theory so that they can continue to be disgusted with the concept.

Educate yourselves, people! EDUCATE!!!!

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Shockwave   
Shockwave
But female masterbation circulates around the clit (generally) which isnt anywhere near the hole.

The nature of the clitoris is a very common misconception. What most people call "the clit" is actually just the glans of the clitoris. The rest of it is a figure-eight shaped network of muscle and nerves that circles the introitus of the vagina and the anal sphincter.

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Wee_Little_Me   
Wee_Little_Me
But female masterbation circulates around the clit (generally) which isnt anywhere near the hole.

The nature of the clitoris is a very common misconception. What most people call "the clit" is actually just the glans of the clitoris. The rest of it is a figure-eight shaped network of muscle and nerves that circles the introitus of the vagina and the anal sphincter.

Yes, hence people not TRULY knowing where the g-spot is. The clit is just the tip. But its what is most commonly used in female masterbation to achieve orgasm. And some women are quite obsessed with their clit. Ooooh I knew a girl who got it pierced once while plastered. Idiot. But thats neither here nor there.....

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Jesse   
Jesse

Hi Wee_Little_Me yes i am aware of ramdom samples etc etc. but i also need a range of poeple AS WELL.

From what i have gathered studies based on sex being possitive for mind body etc etc is that simulare to shopping you feel great after etc but after, after, you dont feel so great, such as the need for it again etc. it's complex to expain how i am approching it. but basically this method would indirectly measuring the out comes. this way is less bias.

but yes i am aware of the studies thank you

thank you though.

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ghosts   
ghosts
The orgasm is female hystaria.

No no, I was actually referring to the state that women were in before they went to the doctor, not the orgasm itself, although perhaps the orgasm was seen as hysteria too. Anyway, I can't find that section in a book of mine right now, so here's something from wikipedia:

Patients diagnosed with female hysteria would undergo "pelvic massage" — manual stimulation of the woman's genitals by the doctor to "hysterical paroxysm", which is now recognized as orgasm.
No wonder so many people are asexual. Theyre just down-right afraid of sex and will do anything to find something to support this theory so that they can continue to be disgusted with the concept.

I don't believe that is the case. I for one am not afraid of sex, I don't find it disgusting. There may be some asexuals who *are* afraid of sex, but many are not.

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Wee_Little_Me   
Wee_Little_Me
From what i have gathered studies based on sex being possitive for mind body etc etc is that simulare to shopping you feel great after etc but after, after, you dont feel so great, such as the need for it again etc. it's complex to expain how i am approching it. but basically this method would indirectly measuring the out comes. this way is less bias.

This is why your asexual. Because you dont understand what is posetive about sex. after you dont feel so great? ARE YOU KIDDING?!?! Have you ever seen someone after theyve had sex? THEYRE FUCKING GLOWING!

And people addicted to sex are another matter all together. Its almost like the opposite of asexual and neither are anything compared to the happy median of a sexually active individual. I imagine sex addicts view us with the same disgust as we view them.

No no, I was actually referring to the state that women were in before they went to the doctor, not the orgasm itself, although perhaps the orgasm was seen as hysteria too. Anyway, I can't find that section in a book of mine right now, so here's something from

Um, I wasnt refering to you, I was talking ot Maco ["in Victorian times female orgasm and "horniness" were so rare they were referred to as "feminine hysteria""]. And if you read what I wrote you'll notice I am fully aware of this. I didnt need you to post it a second time...expecially after I have shown that I comprehend the situation.

:?

Whatever.

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ghosts   
ghosts
Um, I wasnt refering to you, I was talking ot Maco ["in Victorian times female orgasm and "horniness" were so rare they were referred to as "feminine hysteria""]. And if you read what I wrote you'll notice I am fully aware of this. I didnt need you to post it a second time...expecially after I have shown that I comprehend the situation.

:?

Whatever.

I'm... sorry. I didn't mean to get you upset or anything, I just misread your post. I guess that's why I was a bit confused, because I thought you were saying two different things.

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Hallucigenia   
Hallucigenia
From what i have gathered studies based on sex being possitive for mind body etc etc is that simulare to shopping you feel great after etc but after, after, you dont feel so great, such as the need for it again etc. it's complex to expain how i am approching it. but basically this method would indirectly measuring the out comes. this way is less bias.

This is why your asexual. Because you dont understand what is posetive about sex. after you dont feel so great? ARE YOU KIDDING?!?! Have you ever seen someone after theyve had sex? THEYRE FUCKING GLOWING!

To be fair, I don't think that Jesse was talking about people who are experiencing the afterglow immediately after sex. I think she was talking about the next couple of days, when that effect fades and the person starts questioning whether the sex was a good idea and/or craving more of it.

I will be interested to see what direction this study goes in.

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Wee_Little_Me   
Wee_Little_Me
To be fair, I don't think that Jesse was talking about people who are experiencing the afterglow immediately after sex. I think she was talking about the next couple of days, when that effect fades and the person starts questioning whether the sex was a good idea and/or craving more of it.

Yes. Exactly. This is why she's asexual.

In the real world (you know, after highschool dating) there isnt any of that crap. Sex is just another activity. Infact its viewed by many (apparently a majority) that starting a serious relationship without having sex first is rediculous because you need to see if your sexually compatable. Which is good news for us, actually, because that should get out of the way rather quickly.

Any way, after the 'glow' fades they have sex again and it comes back. And after that sex gets boring they introduce new positions and pron flicks or locations or something to get it exciting.

I dont think she needs to stop trying to prove the benifits of asexuality but rather understand why sexuals do what they do because she doesnt seem to understand it. What she views as a drawback is what they view as a posetive. And that is why she is asexual, and they are not.

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starrysky   
starrysky
This is why your asexual. Because you dont understand what is posetive about sex. after you dont feel so great? ARE YOU KIDDING?!?! Have you ever seen someone after theyve had sex? THEYRE FUCKING GLOWING!

You are making a lot of assumptions in this thread. Feel free to tell me why I am asexual, I would genuinely like to know. I've seen people after sex, I have it all the time and I'm no more glowing than I am after doing the dishes.

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Xenon   
Xenon
Sex is just another activity. Infact its viewed by many (apparently a majority) that starting a serious relationship without having sex first is rediculous because you need to see if your sexually compatable. Which is good news for us, actually, because that should get out of the way rather quickly.

That is one of the most ridiculous things I've read today. You make it sound as if sex is about as important or significant to a person as eating, a mundane activity that people do without much thought. How depressing.

And this line about "sexually compatible" is a load of crap. Two people who barely know each other having sex is little more than masturbating with a partner. Sex as part of a committed relationship is a sharing of intimacy that can exist only where an emotional bond has been established. Me, I would not have sex until and unless a serious relationship -- or, at the very least, a close friendship -- has developed.

Any way, after the 'glow' fades they have sex again and it comes back.

Sounds like being addicted to a drug -- when the high wears off, you need another fix to get high again.

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Wee_Little_Me   
Wee_Little_Me
This is why your asexual. Because you dont understand what is posetive about sex. after you dont feel so great? ARE YOU KIDDING?!?! Have you ever seen someone after theyve had sex? THEYRE FUCKING GLOWING!

You are making a lot of assumptions in this thread. Feel free to tell me why I am asexual, I would genuinely like to know. I've seen people after sex, I have it all the time and I'm no more glowing than I am after doing the dishes.

:roll: Yeah, im making assumptions. I would never DARE tell an asexual why they are they way they are. I can pass along theories I have, but it is ultimatly for the person to decide their sexuality and their reasions (if any).

Now if we please, can we go back to the topic at hand: masterbation.

That is one of the most ridiculous things I've read today. You make it sound as if sex is about as important or significant to a person as eating, a mundane activity that people do without much thought. How depressing.

Im going to have to agree. I dont like it either. But, alas, that is the situation.

And this line about "sexually compatible" is a load of crap. Two people who barely know each other having sex is little more than masturbating with a partner. Sex as part of a committed relationship is a sharing of intimacy that can exist only where an emotional bond has been established. Me, I would not have sex until and unless a serious relationship -- or, at the very least, a close friendship -- has developed.

Yeah thats how I view it too. But thats why Im asexual :D

Sounds like being addicted to a drug -- when the high wears off, you need another fix to get high again.

No. Its like watching a movie. It gets boring. You need to spice it up with different things. But if youd like to prove that sex is a drug and todays highly sexual society is leading to the cause of violence in sex then go for it. I doubt you'll get very far, for many sexuals who enjoy rough sex have always prefered that to gentle sex. But to each their own, eh?

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Shockwave   
Shockwave

Wee_Little_Me, passing on theories and trying to educate people is a good thing. However, you come across as very condescending, which is counterproductive to what you are trying to do. Most people react to this attitude by either ignoring what you are saying or reflexively closing their minds to it. I suggest wording your posts differently and not using the rolling eyes smilie.

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Xenon   
Xenon
That is one of the most ridiculous things I've read today. You make it sound as if sex is about as important or significant to a person as eating, a mundane activity that people do without much thought. How depressing.

Im going to have to agree. I dont like it either. But, alas, that is the situation.

It may be for some people. But certainly not for everyone.

And this line about "sexually compatible" is a load of crap. Two people who barely know each other having sex is little more than masturbating with a partner. Sex as part of a committed relationship is a sharing of intimacy that can exist only where an emotional bond has been established. Me, I would not have sex until and unless a serious relationship -- or, at the very least, a close friendship -- has developed.

Yeah thats how I view it too. But thats why Im asexual :D

My girlfriend in college -- the woman I first had sex with -- had indicated to me that she needs to have a strong positive connection with someone in order to get into the sack with them. But at the same time, once she finds that someone, she enjoys it. So, she and I view things in the same way; the big difference there is, she had a much stronger sex drive than I do (mine is practically nonexistent). I would hardly call her asexual.

If you need to have a committed relationship in order to have sex, that isn't being asexual, that's having standards. (Standards I find admirable, btw.)

Sounds like being addicted to a drug -- when the high wears off, you need another fix to get high again.

No. Its like watching a movie. It gets boring. You need to spice it up with different things. But if youd like to prove that sex is a drug and todays highly sexual society is leading to the cause of violence in sex then go for it. I doubt you'll get very far, for many sexuals who enjoy rough sex have always prefered that to gentle sex. But to each their own, eh?

:shock: Okay, where the hell did that come from??? How did the level of violence in our society get into the discussion? I sure as heck didn't bring it up.

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Wee_Little_Me   
Wee_Little_Me
That is one of the most ridiculous things I've read today. You make it sound as if sex is about as important or significant to a person as eating' date=' a mundane activity that people do without much thought. How depressing. [/quote']

Im going to have to agree. I dont like it either. But' date=' alas, that is the situation.[/quote']

It may be for some people. But certainly not for everyone.

Not once did I say it was, nor did I try to imply it. But im glad we agree on something.

And this line about "sexually compatible" is a load of crap. Two people who barely know each other having sex is little more than masturbating with a partner. Sex as part of a committed relationship is a sharing of intimacy that can exist only where an emotional bond has been established. Me' date=' I would not have sex until and unless a serious relationship -- or, at the very least, a close friendship -- has developed. [/quote']

Yeah thats how I view it too. But thats why Im asexual :D

My girlfriend in college -- the woman I first had sex with -- had indicated to me that she needs to have a strong positive connection with someone in order to get into the sack with them. But at the same time, once she finds that someone, she enjoys it. So, she and I view things in the same way; the big difference there is, she had a much stronger sex drive than I do (mine is practically nonexistent). I would hardly call her asexual.

If you need to have a committed relationship in order to have sex, that isn't being asexual, that's having standards. (Standards I find admirable, btw.)

Everyone is intitled to their own morals and standards. Im glad you found someone who you aprove of.

On a slightly unrelated note, there is that thing about intimacy taht does seem to bother sexuals. The kiss is a very intimate thing. Prostitutes charge a LOT for a kiss.

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