Andiamo Posted January 13, 2017 Share Posted January 13, 2017 I was trying on some new clothes and showing them to my mom. One of the shirts had an "M" sticker on it for "medium." Mom said "You know, if you're keeping it you can remove the M." My brother looked over and said "M? You can wear that if you decide to change genders!" THAT WAS THE FASTEST MY EXPRESSION HAS REACHED PANICKED AND THE FASTEST IT HAS SWITCHED TO UNCOMFORTABLE FAKE LAUGHTER. They obviously weren't fooled, so I ended up taking the sticker and flipping it upside down so that it said "W" (which felt kind of gross, but whatever) and then they believed it and started laughing. I immediately removed the sticker and threw it in the trash. Link to post Share on other sites
nerdperson777 Posted January 13, 2017 Share Posted January 13, 2017 Don't exactly know where this idea falls under but when you find yourself needlessly gendering items or actions. The other day I was doing my martial arts practice. For the Northern style, it tends to be that the straightsword/spear is the pretty weapon combo since the straightsword is considered a gentleman's weapon. Broadsword/staff is the hack and slash combo. Southern style is considered barbaric since it's the most applicable to actual fighting, so the "manliest" one. I keep catching myself trying to put femme girls and gentle guys in the pretty category and butch girls and masculine guys in the other with the slashing and manly stuff. Afterwards I'll take myself back and remind that I should not place people in categories for them. Unlearning these gender roles can be hard. I've heard people preferring straightsword with Southern and straightsword with staff so I don't even know anymore. I myself might just like swords since staves and spears are long and I may not have the arm strength for them. They tire me out faster. Link to post Share on other sites
Dodecahedron314 Posted January 25, 2017 Share Posted January 25, 2017 Gender/sexuality studies instructor, during a class discussion on the lack of recognition of certain groups' genders (e.g. the lack of recognition of female slaves as women throughout history): "Clearly, everybody has a gender of some sort, it's just a matter of how that gender exists on a nexus of legibility." Me: *looks into camera like I'm on The Office* Link to post Share on other sites
Blueberry Pie Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 One of my friends who knows that I'm agender has frequently asked questions about it. I really like that she's trying to understand and support me, but the way she brings it up bothers me. Like, she gets all awkward and stuff. Yesterday, she told me that she doesn't want to use my preferred pronouns because "it isn't grammatically correct." I told her that the pronoun you is both singular and plural, but she still refused to use the pronoun they. Link to post Share on other sites
Ettina Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 On 4/1/2015 at 5:13 PM, Xycto said: Is it just me or an Agender thing where you just feel like your not fully in your body? Like almost as if you were an inch or two above your skin... No idea if that's an agender thing too, but I get that (I'm cis, but have dissociative symptoms because of PTSD). Link to post Share on other sites
Dodecahedron314 Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 I'm writing the final paper for my gender studies class, and it's taking all my willpower not to have my thesis essentially be, "Hey society, have you tried just...not doing the gender thing?" Link to post Share on other sites
Finn. Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 @Dodecahedron314 I would support this so much though! What will your thesis be on by the way? gender studies is so interesting, I'm sure people come up with the coolest topics for their final paper. Link to post Share on other sites
The-world-is-quiet-here Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 This is kinda like that. So yesterday, I was talking to my dad about the book I was reading in my Anthropology class, called Men and Women. My dad: Was it about... Men and Women? Me internally: no it was about the nonbinaries!! Me externally: haha yeah... Link to post Share on other sites
Dodecahedron314 Posted March 20, 2017 Share Posted March 20, 2017 On 3/13/2017 at 5:06 AM, Finn. said: @Dodecahedron314 I would support this so much though! What will your thesis be on by the way? gender studies is so interesting, I'm sure people come up with the coolest topics for their final paper. The prompt was dealing with the problematization of human rights discourse terminology in relation to gendered violence (e.g. violence against women...of course, none of our readings on this matter focused on any group except cis women, and over the entire two quarters of the course, we've read exactly one trans author ), and I essentially tried to remove as much of the specifically gender-focused bits of the prompt as I could and instead focused on the problems with how the way human rights are defined intersects with pre-existing issues that people of different genders and orientations already face. The course was, indeed, pretty interesting, but it would have been a whole lot more interesting if we'd read any appreciable number of authors who weren't cis white lesbian second-wave feminists. Link to post Share on other sites
Mychemicalqpr Posted March 21, 2017 Share Posted March 21, 2017 Pandora wanted to know my gender in the sign up and there were only two options, no other, no refuse to answer. So I bitterly said male. I just got an ad about shaving stuff and cracked up. So this is why they needed to know. I regret nothing. Link to post Share on other sites
Cognition! Posted March 21, 2017 Share Posted March 21, 2017 TODAY I TOOK A MATHS TEST WITH A "NON-CONFORMING/UNSPECIFIED" OPTION IN THE PERSONAL DETAILS SECTION Then I remembered that the follow-on rounds involved being put into a team of people decided by gender segregation. So I reluctantly chose the biological option. Link to post Share on other sites
Alex the Queer Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 every single time there's something totally unspecific that doesn't need the gender thing, society decides to do the thing anyway. and literally any situation ever where things are split between male and female Link to post Share on other sites
Andiamo Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 I had to sign up for Facebook for an internship I got for the summer. Only problem is, Facebook forces you to pick "male or female" when you sign up. And since I'm not out but my profile could be found by anyone (even my dad, he's very active on there), I had to put "female." I uploaded a profile picture, and now every single time I so much as glance at that page I see "Brianna changed her profile picture" and I hate it. Link to post Share on other sites
ChillaKilla Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 @Andiamo you can change your pronouns on FB. You can also change your gender and opt to hide it from everyone. I had mine as "they" even before I came out. Link to post Share on other sites
<No longer active> Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 29 minutes ago, ChillaKilla said: @Andiamo you can change your pronouns on FB. You can also change your gender and opt to hide it from everyone. I had mine as "they" even before I came out. same. i'm not out to everyone but pretty much anyone can see my gender on FB if they just look ...nobody looks Link to post Share on other sites
SamwiseLovesLife Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 33 minutes ago, Andiamo said: I had to sign up for Facebook for an internship I got for the summer. Only problem is, Facebook forces you to pick "male or female" when you sign up. And since I'm not out but my profile could be found by anyone (even my dad, he's very active on there), I had to put "female." I uploaded a profile picture, and now every single time I so much as glance at that page I see "Brianna changed her profile picture" and I hate it. Might seem like a waste of time but I would message/email the facebook helpdesk if I were you. The more they see this bothers people, the more likely they are to add a third option Link to post Share on other sites
Andiamo Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 46 minutes ago, ChillaKilla said: @Andiamo you can change your pronouns on FB. You can also change your gender and opt to hide it from everyone. I had mine as "they" even before I came out. 26 minutes ago, AmberLovesLife said: Might seem like a waste of time but I would message/email the facebook helpdesk if I were you. The more they see this bothers people, the more likely they are to add a third option I do know that you can change it. Seeing as I have it for work, though, I'm not sure if I'd be comfortable with changing it, at least not until I know them. Link to post Share on other sites
SamwiseLovesLife Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 11 minutes ago, Andiamo said: I do know that you can change it. Seeing as I have it for work, though, I'm not sure if I'd be comfortable with changing it, at least not until I know them. That's fair enough, though when you do it could be a subtle way of showing you're not cis without coming out. Good luck with the job btw! Link to post Share on other sites
Andiamo Posted June 13, 2017 Share Posted June 13, 2017 I work at an ice cream shop. As I was going to get ice cream for my first customer today, she started saying "I remember when they wouldn't hire girls to work here. They thought that girls like you...." She kept going on about "girls like me" until I had gotten ice cream for everyone in the group, while I was just standing there, fake smiling and saying "anything else for you?" Link to post Share on other sites
Luftschlosseule Posted June 13, 2017 Share Posted June 13, 2017 Having an earworm of "Girls just wanna have fun" on an agender day is... I start singing in my head and close the line with "what did I just do?" Link to post Share on other sites
999papercranes Posted June 13, 2017 Share Posted June 13, 2017 Whenever I try on dresses when I'm shopping with my mom I just look in the mirror and it feels like I'm looking at somebody else and not in a good way. There was this one dress that made me look like I had a really large chest (and I don't, at all) and I hated it so much but my mom was all like, "You look so nice." No. I don't look nice. This stranger standing in the mirror looks nice but it's not me. Link to post Share on other sites
Blueberry Pie Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 I'm usually fine with my body, but when I have to deal with stupid female-bodied stuff... My period recently started up again. I'm usually very irregular (I'm still a teenager), so this is amazing to some of my family, I guess. For example... Mom: Your period began? Me; Unfortunately. Mom: Me too! We're like SISTERS! Me, internally: Heck no, gosh darn-it! I didn't ask for this curse. Later, while I change a pad in the bathroom... Dad, outside the bathroom: It's time to be a woman! Me: Why do you say that? [Crying internally] Dad: Because you're now a woman. Me, internally: STOP, I BEG OF YOU! I DON'T WANT TO BE A WOMAN, GOSH! Meanwhile, my brother looks at me with a slight smile on his face, as if to say, "Glad I never have to deal with that!" But I don't want his male-bodied problems either. Not at all. Can't I just have a sexless body? There's no point in any of these parts! I don't want sex or kids that are biologically related to me, gosh darn-it! Link to post Share on other sites
999papercranes Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 1 hour ago, Blueberry Pie said: I'm usually fine with my body, but when I have to deal with stupid female-bodied stuff... My period recently started up again. I'm usually very irregular (I'm still a teenager), so this is amazing to some of my family, I guess. For example... Mom: Your period began? Me; Unfortunately. Mom: Me too! We're like SISTERS! Me, internally: Heck no, gosh darn-it! I didn't ask for this curse. Later, while I change a pad in the bathroom... Dad, outside the bathroom: It's time to be a woman! Me: Why do you say that? [Crying internally] Dad: Because you're now a woman. Me, internally: STOP, I BEG OF YOU! I DON'T WANT TO BE A WOMAN, GOSH! Meanwhile, my brother looks at me with a slight smile on his face, as if to say, "Glad I never have to deal with that!" But I don't want his male-bodied problems either. Not at all. Can't I just have a sexless body? There's no point in any of these parts! I don't want sex or kids that are biologically related to me, gosh darn-it! Wow, I relate so hard to this! I just got my period like three hours ago I hate it. It's so foreign and disgusting and ahhhh! I totally want that sexless body right now. Reproductive organs are useless in my case as I'm never going to have sex or biology children. Luckily when I exercise a lot my period pretty much goes away. (This probably isn't very healthy because that means my body fat percentage is too low, but eh... I'm fifteen and I have a crazy metabolism. I'll gain some weight soon enough.) Link to post Share on other sites
Andiamo Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 4 hours ago, Blueberry Pie said: I'm usually fine with my body, but when I have to deal with stupid female-bodied stuff... My period recently started up again. I'm usually very irregular (I'm still a teenager), so this is amazing to some of my family, I guess. For example... Mom: Your period began? Me; Unfortunately. Mom: Me too! We're like SISTERS! Me, internally: Heck no, gosh darn-it! I didn't ask for this curse. Later, while I change a pad in the bathroom... Dad, outside the bathroom: It's time to be a woman! Me: Why do you say that? [Crying internally] Dad: Because you're now a woman. Me, internally: STOP, I BEG OF YOU! I DON'T WANT TO BE A WOMAN, GOSH! Meanwhile, my brother looks at me with a slight smile on his face, as if to say, "Glad I never have to deal with that!" But I don't want his male-bodied problems either. Not at all. Can't I just have a sexless body? There's no point in any of these parts! I don't want sex or kids that are biologically related to me, gosh darn-it! I relate to this way too much. Link to post Share on other sites
Dodecahedron314 Posted June 22, 2017 Share Posted June 22, 2017 On 6/20/2017 at 4:20 AM, Blueberry Pie said: I'm usually fine with my body, but when I have to deal with stupid female-bodied stuff... My period recently started up again. I'm usually very irregular (I'm still a teenager), so this is amazing to some of my family, I guess. For example... Mom: Your period began? Me; Unfortunately. Mom: Me too! We're like SISTERS! Me, internally: Heck no, gosh darn-it! I didn't ask for this curse. Later, while I change a pad in the bathroom... Dad, outside the bathroom: It's time to be a woman! Me: Why do you say that? [Crying internally] Dad: Because you're now a woman. Me, internally: STOP, I BEG OF YOU! I DON'T WANT TO BE A WOMAN, GOSH! Meanwhile, my brother looks at me with a slight smile on his face, as if to say, "Glad I never have to deal with that!" But I don't want his male-bodied problems either. Not at all. Can't I just have a sexless body? There's no point in any of these parts! I don't want sex or kids that are biologically related to me, gosh darn-it! Just...all of the godawful gendering going on here... *screams internally* Link to post Share on other sites
Luftschlosseule Posted June 22, 2017 Share Posted June 22, 2017 The pads I use at the moment are individually packed, which I like, but unfortunately, "girls" is written over and over on the packaging, which you didn't see from the outside. It really bothered me, the last time I had my period. Link to post Share on other sites
Blueberry Pie Posted June 22, 2017 Share Posted June 22, 2017 16 hours ago, Dodecahedron314 said: Just...all of the godawful gendering going on here... *screams internally* Yes, and this always seems to happen whenever my period starts. It's terrible and makes me feel so uncomfortable; it's like they're mistaking me for a different person who is very feminine. Unfortunately, my mother's nickname for me is "sweet girl." In addition, my dad has ranted on about me being his "little girl" in the past. They gender me no matter what, and it's like they expect me to be something I'm not. I guess it's my fault though... I have not told them anything. It's interesting how a close relative of mine can be out as gay while I can't be out as asexual, aromantic, or agender. When I tried to discuss my asexuality it was called a phase by my mom. Link to post Share on other sites
Dodecahedron314 Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 I'm out to my QPP and he's been great about it (he's got a better track record with pronouns than my mom does, even though we've only seen each other twice in the past 2 years), but I've got no hope of ever explaining being agender to my dad, so when we said goodbye before I had to leave for my job tomorrow on the other side of the country, my QPP had to misgender me because my dad was picking me up. Link to post Share on other sites
Destan Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 [Deleted] Link to post Share on other sites
Destan Posted November 11, 2017 Share Posted November 11, 2017 [Deleted] Link to post Share on other sites
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