interpol Posted March 22, 2015 Share Posted March 22, 2015 Some part of me is terrified that I might be viewed as a sexual being if I came out and said I was bi. Sexual beings could be wife or mother, but a total hussy in bed. And a lot of sexual beings I've known who were proud of it were people with multiple partners. Or sexual beings could be people who just did a lot of things with people. I guess I'm just hoping that if I say I do have sexual desires, that I'm not viewed as a sad fuck, or as an object. Or, hoping people don't actually picture me naked because just no. Or masturbating, which is private. Or as disobedient or subversive. Why do I care so much about what other people think of me? Link to post Share on other sites
jimerman Posted March 22, 2015 Share Posted March 22, 2015 Some part of me is terrified that I might be viewed as a sexual being if I came out and said I was bi. that's the same thing i wonder about. i often say i am not gay because i like dicks i am gay because i like guys. Link to post Share on other sites
SkyWorld Posted March 22, 2015 Share Posted March 22, 2015 Some part of me is terrified that I might be viewed as a sexual being if I came out and said I was bi. that's the same thing i wonder about. i often say i am not gay because i like dicks i am gay because i like guys. My goodness, my ex friend had mentioned something like this to me. This was before I knew about asexuality and I told her I was a bit confused about my sexuality but thought I was heterosexual by default. Basically she told me that I for me to like guys, I must like penis. My face. Excuse me, but no... please stop. Link to post Share on other sites
jimerman Posted March 22, 2015 Share Posted March 22, 2015 Some part of me is terrified that I might be viewed as a sexual being if I came out and said I was bi. that's the same thing i wonder about. i often say i am not gay because i like dicks i am gay because i like guys. My goodness, my ex friend had mentioned something like this to me. This was before I knew about asexuality and I told her I was a bit confused about my sexuality but thought I was heterosexual by default. Basically she told me that I for me to like guys, I must like penis. My face. Excuse me, but no... please stop. same with me, i always assumed that i didn't want to have sex with other man so i must hetero. it wasn't till i had sex with a woman that i realized that that sucked too. Link to post Share on other sites
interpol Posted March 22, 2015 Author Share Posted March 22, 2015 The thing is, by themselves, I'm pretty sure everyone thinks genitalia look like fried vegetables that grew hair and came from outer space. Like, they're designed for you to not like them. It's just the nasty connotations that calling anyone a "sexual being" brings up. That they have body parts? Okay, everyone has body parts. But the main thing that worries me about sex is how people seem to think it tarnishes you, makes you no better than a wild animal. That it's a stain on you just for being here, really. I still remember a seventh grade teacher telling us to sit with the knowledge that every single one of us is the result of the weaknesses of our parents, and that nobody is any better. I still can hear my dad saying "this idiot must have screwed around." I don't want to believe this. I also don't want to be viewed as "up for the taking." But I can't act like the women on screen either! I'm just me. Link to post Share on other sites
ByTheTracks Posted March 22, 2015 Share Posted March 22, 2015 Man, the tapes the adults create that we replay in our heads time after time is crazy, yeah? I heard all these same things growing up (and that was a LONG time ago). I'm surprised people still speak like that because most of my adult friends don't think like this. I don't think all people think that it "tarnishes" you. You might live in a much more conservative area of the country. If so, just know that not everyone thinks like that. Link to post Share on other sites
Bezzy-Loo Posted March 22, 2015 Share Posted March 22, 2015 So... biromantic asexual? ^^; Link to post Share on other sites
interpol Posted March 22, 2015 Author Share Posted March 22, 2015 I'm not biromantic. I am heteroromantic bisexual (you could say bidemi but I do not agree with the term "demisexual," as that is normal.) It's the connotations of being sexual that are a problem. Link to post Share on other sites
Bezzy-Loo Posted March 22, 2015 Share Posted March 22, 2015 I'm a bit confused by the bisexual/asexual duality. Do you feel sexual attraction to both genders (if so, maybe you're gray?)? Do you feel only aesthetic attraction to both genders? Link to post Share on other sites
interpol Posted March 25, 2015 Author Share Posted March 25, 2015 I feel that the words I used to describe my orientation above are enough for me and therefore should be enough for anyone else. I do not wish to be viewed as someone sex crazy or flirtatious, or submissive, or in-love, or marked with shame, all of which I have associated with sex. Link to post Share on other sites
Bezzy-Loo Posted March 26, 2015 Share Posted March 26, 2015 My apologies. I was simply trying to help to have a descriptor that would remove the implication of being sexual. I think I may also have misunderstood the issue to begin with. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.