clueingforlooks Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 TMI WARNING Is there a difference between having a libido and having a sex drive? I feel like I may have one without the other, but I don't know. I figured along with being asexual, I was a nonlibidoist as well. I don't feel sexual attraction and I don't ever masturbate, fantasize, or ever really get "turned on". I read a lot of pornographic fanfiction (I don't read it for the porn part of it, but its really the only sexual thing I do, I suppose), and sometimes I feel something, but I don't know how to explain it really. I've always just referred to it as my "down there business" in my head, and just ignored it and it goes away pretty quickly, because I've never really liked it. So now I'm wondering if maybe this is actually my libido, or if this is some sort of sex drive without the desire for sex? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Annapox Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 As far as I know, libido and sex drive refer to exactly the same thing. Maybe what you're feeling is arousal? It's possible to experience arousal even if you don't have a libido/sex drive. Libido is your body saying "I want sexual stimulation." It isn't necessarily directed at someone, but it is an urge. Arousal is just a feeling. It often occurs with libido, but it doesn't have to. So if you're feeling something in response to a stimulus such as erotic fiction, but you have no urge to do anything about it, that could be arousal without libido. I hope that makes sense. It's hard to explain. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kelico Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 I can really relate to what you said! And how I see it, yeah, libido and sex drive mean the same thing. But arousal is separate. That is what you're feeling. Arousal is a natural reaction to stimuli...said stimuli would include erotic material or touching, etc. When the stimuli is removed, the reaction/arousal will go away (like you said, when you ignore it, it just fades). This is all possible even if you identify as a nonlibidoist because arousal is separate from having a libido...which is a desire to satisfy the sexual urge. Soooo basically, I agree with everything Annapox said. : )) Best wishes! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
deltaX Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 The people who commented above me basically said was going to say. I'm also pretty sure that libido and sex drive are synonymous, but arousal is different. Most likely you are experiencing arousal without a libido/sex drive. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Sex-drive and libido are synonyms to allosexuals but in the asexual community we use libido to mean masturbation-drive. Some ppl use sex-drive but its very misleading/sounds like desire for sex with someone else. Though definition wise it just means "desired satisfaction of sexual urges" which is vague enough to mean sex or masturbation. Though i would assume they mean sexual as in sex and not the words original meaning of refering to sex organs. I dont think we have an actual/non-repurpiced name for masturbation-drive other than that. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
clueingforlooks Posted March 13, 2015 Author Share Posted March 13, 2015 As far as I know, libido and sex drive refer to exactly the same thing. Maybe what you're feeling is arousal? It's possible to experience arousal even if you don't have a libido/sex drive. Libido is your body saying "I want sexual stimulation." It isn't necessarily directed at someone, but it is an urge. Arousal is just a feeling. It often occurs with libido, but it doesn't have to. So if you're feeling something in response to a stimulus such as erotic fiction, but you have no urge to do anything about it, that could be arousal without libido. I hope that makes sense. It's hard to explain. This helped a lot! I had thought arousal was something that was directed at someone, but this makes a lot of sense. Thanks! :D Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rising Sun Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 No, arousal doesn't have to be directed at somebody. It's another word to describe an erection and potentially other physical "symptoms" that usually go with it, nothing more, nothing less. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
MoraDollie Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Libido is synonymous with sex drive, as well as sexual desire and passion for someone. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AWhiteGyrfalcon Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 As far as I know, libido and sex drive refer to exactly the same thing. Maybe what you're feeling is arousal? It's possible to experience arousal even if you don't have a libido/sex drive. Libido is your body saying "I want sexual stimulation." It isn't necessarily directed at someone, but it is an urge. Arousal is just a feeling. It often occurs with libido, but it doesn't have to. So if you're feeling something in response to a stimulus such as erotic fiction, but you have no urge to do anything about it, that could be arousal without libido. I hope that makes sense. It's hard to explain. I tend to agree with Annapox here...:-) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AWhiteGyrfalcon Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Rising Sun' = had a good point too!! No, arousal doesn't have to be directed at somebody. It's another word to describe an erection and potentially other physical "symptoms" that usually go with it, nothing more, nothing less. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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